# Who is the breadwinner in your home?



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

Both or is one dependent on the other? Could you go it alone?

I won't ever be rich. I will always be able to support myself. We work as a team. I am happy to see that so many young women are financially independent these days. It must be a horrible feeling to be beholden to someone else for your lifestyle.


----------



## TnAndy (Sep 15, 2005)

Wife out earned me for last 20yrs we worked. She went back to night school (local State U) and got her Masters & EdD in education because she worked for local school system and the only way to advance up the pay scale is time and degree level....so she maxed out the later in mid 90's.

I was self employed in the construction/remodeling business and earned about 1/2 what she did income wise, but I managed to build 3 rental homes, and do a lot of the homestead infrastructure during times there were no 'cash' jobs. Once I figured out rental income wasn't subject to the 15.3% social security tax I was paying for the privilege of being self employed, I was gung ho about making that a big part of my income.(Surprised SS didn't call about mid 2000's to see if I was still alive, my earnings statement had lot of zero years..... )

That, of course, resulted in my SS only being about 1/2 what hers is + she has a nice retirement check from State of TN, (the last 5 yr income averaged makes a huge difference in retirement check) but between the 3 checks, we manage to put 20%/mo in savings, so we do fine. The infrastructure stuff I did reduced out outflow of cash quite a bit, so "penny saved is a penny earned" (or more, given today's tax structure ). Sold the rentals off before retirement (too much PITA), and have a nice nest egg from that....so, life is good if you have a plan, and work it. 

We've always worked as a team as well....and nearly 48 years later, still are.


----------



## happy hermits (Jan 2, 2018)

My husband is the bread winner. I am the bread maker. We are a team I do the preserving. making cheese. foraging. the list goes on and on. I have had jobs but am the one to stay home with kids. Now I watch grandson and two more grandbabies on the way. It works for us today is our anniversary 29 years.


----------



## CKelly78z (Jul 16, 2017)

For the past 20 years, I made more than my wife did working in a factory, but just barely. Recently, she finally got the huge raise she deserved for all the work she does as a home builder project manager job, that she has been doing for 18 years. She now makes 30% more than I do, and things are starting to get easier. We just need to get through our daughter's upcoming wedding, and help my son move out and find his own place.

We are a team, and nothing is off limits for each of us as far as responsibilities around our farm.


----------



## tiffanysgallery (Jan 17, 2015)

Just one, no one else in the household, and I won't lie, I've had a few times where it's been rough, but mostly I've been blessed.





edit: misspelled, ruff


----------



## Evons hubby (Oct 3, 2005)

Both of us have adequate incomes of our own so neither is dependent upon the other financially. I am dependent upon her for her love, kindness, and caring.... She is what makes my life worth living!


----------



## alleyyooper (Apr 22, 2005)

We both have our own income. I admit I hussle more than her and keep a bit of jingle for my self. I have been keeping a bit back from my lawn mowing and yesterday while she was at a family function went and spent $200.00 of that held back jingle on reloading supplys. 

She frowns if I mention I need to get an 8 pound jug of powder, a 1000 primers even bother her when you can just buy 100 at a time. 
Why do you need so much at a time.

Be cause I have let my supplys run low before and had to wait many months because primers are not to be found any where.
I allowed my reduced load powder supply to get low and now they don't make the stuff any longer and I need to set down and work up new reduceload recipes.

 Al


----------



## Ronney (Nov 26, 2004)

No doubt about it, my other half is the bread winner in our home - and it worries me not at all. "Bread winner" could be considered the operative term - he puts the food on the table, pays the power, phone etc. but I run the farm and it pays part of the mortgage, rates (land tax) and fert, lime, fencing maintenance expenses and puts meat and vegetables on the table. Am I able to be independent? -yes! and so is he. In the meantime we run as a co-operative.

Cheers,
Ronnie


----------



## TripleD (Feb 12, 2011)

I'm all alone. I haven't missed a meal in over 25 years since the divorce...


----------



## Oregon1986 (Apr 25, 2017)

I don't think either one of us could do it without the other,we both contribute to what makes our house run. Technically speaking though,he is the bread winner and I am thankful for that because I get to stay home and raise our children. I make sure the house is clean, dinner is ready when he gets home and kids are taken care of.


----------



## tripletmom (Feb 4, 2005)

I've always had a good job and it made sense for him to not work. He's very talented, builds, gardens, cans, mechanic, you name it. 
I'm retired now and we live on our savings. Only able to do so as a team. He could earn a living easy enough if necessary.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> It must be a horrible feeling to be *beholden* to someone else for your lifestyle.


I don't see anything "horrible" about having one spouse that makes enough money that the other one doesn't need to get a paying job. 

There's enough "work" to be done at most homes to keep someone occupied.

It's not "being beholden".
It's simply a personal choice by consenting adults.

Having a job doesn't make a person better than anyone else, as long as they aren't living on welfare.


----------



## newfieannie (Dec 24, 2006)

yeah I think that was probably the wrong word. I was feeling bad about it and didn't want to answer until BFF explained it. I've never worked for pay in my life. I just took care of my family, home , land, animals etc. my love when he was dying.

then when I remarried a couple times I mostly just took care of them to the end. let me tell ya lots of work there. ~Georgia


----------



## Cabin Fever (May 10, 2002)

I bring home a paycheck, but my wife works a heck of a lot harder and puts in more hours than I do to keep this homestead maintained, clean, and organized. I could not do it without her.


----------



## po boy (Jul 12, 2010)

I am, all the dog and cats do is beg!


----------



## wr (Aug 10, 2003)

painterswife said:


> Both or is one dependent on the other? Could you go it alone?
> 
> I won't ever be rich. I will always be able to support myself. We work as a team. I am happy to see that so many young women are financially independent these days. It must be a horrible feeling to be beholden to someone else for your lifestyle.


Women should do what they feel is fulfilling and enriches their lives, not make choices because other women look down upon their choices. 

Most women can go it alone, if they have to or not and I've watched many use life skills on a resume and easily secure something other than a minimum wage job.


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

There is a big difference between being a functional important working part of the household and being entirely dependent on another for your lifestyle. Seems some might think I don't know the difference. I mentioned women because so many older women can't leave their husbands because they are not financially independent on their own. That now is also happening with men as more househusbands left the workplace to raise the children. I believe it very important to teach our youth to have the ability to be financially independent.

I believe that our younger generation is doing a pretty great job at making sure that even if they choose to be the one at home raising the children. They do amazing things from internet businesses or other small businesses from home.

It is actually pretty amazing how easily someone can end up with very little because of prenups and spouses keeping business and personal wealth legally seperate.


----------



## Oregon1986 (Apr 25, 2017)

I look at life as cycles. I have been a stay at home mom and I have worked 60 hours a week 9 months pregnant because it was what I needed to do. I don't see how someone can judge another for what works best for them


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

Oregon1986 said:


> I look at life as cycles. I have been a stay at home mom and I have worked 60 hours a week 9 months pregnant because it was what I needed to do. I don't see how someone can judge another for what works best for them


Is that really true? You don't judge other peoples choices?


----------



## mreynolds (Jan 1, 2015)

CKelly78z said:


> For the past 20 years, I made more than my wife did working in a factory, but just barely. Recently, she finally got the huge raise she deserved for all the work she does as a home builder project manager job, that she has been doing for 18 years. She now makes 30% more than I do, and things are starting to get easier. We just need to get through our daughter's upcoming wedding, and help my son move out and find his own place.
> 
> We are a team, and nothing is off limits for each of us as far as responsibilities around our farm.


That's good. It really bothers me when I see companies that pay women less for doing the same job in construction. In my lifetime I have had mostly better luck with women PMs and architects.


----------



## Fishindude (May 19, 2015)

We were lucky that I had a pretty good paying job and as soon as we had kids my wife was able to stay home full time with them. She worked full time prior to that and once they got to about high school age she took up seasonal part time work, kind of a "fun job". We're both unemployed loafers every day now, but still seem to stay darned busy.


----------



## wr (Aug 10, 2003)

painterswife said:


> There is a big difference between being a functional important working part of the household and being entirely dependent on another for your lifestyle. Seems some might think I don't know the difference. I mentioned women because so many older women can't leave their husbands because they are not financially independent on their own. That now is also happening with men as more househusbands left the workplace to raise the children. I believe it very important to teach our youth to have the ability to be financially independent.
> 
> I believe that our younger generation is doing a pretty great job at making sure that even if they choose to be the one at home raising the children. They do amazing things from internet businesses or other small businesses from home.
> 
> It is actually pretty amazing how easily someone can end up with very little because of prenups and spouses keeping business and personal wealth legally seperate.


I'm pretty firmly of the opinion that nobody is forced to live with someone because they are financially dependent, although I can't imagine many who haven't heard of spousal support.


----------



## nehimama (Jun 18, 2005)

It's always only been me. I'm the only one I can depend on.


----------



## HDRider (Jul 21, 2011)

I got the bread, she won me.


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

wr said:


> I'm pretty firmly of the opinion that nobody is forced to live with someone because they are financially dependent, although I can't imagine many who haven't heard of spousal support.


Force may not be the correct word. Need is sometimes a force in itself. I think you might be very suprised how well some spouses tie up the money in ways that spousal support is minimal and community property is almost non existent. You might be able to survive but it could be a meager existence. Not all states are community property states.


----------



## alleyyooper (Apr 22, 2005)

A friend of mine owns a beef operation farm In Wisconsin. Has been about 22 years he moved there from Michign. When he first got there he tried to hire young high school men/boys thru the high school ag department. He was paying pretty good, so good in fact I told him I waas about to buy a travel trailer and move to his farm for summer work.

Those young men/boys would just not show up when there was hay to be put in thre barn. They were abuseing his tractors and other equipment too.
Then one day a young lady came to his house and asked for a job on the farm. that lead to more young women coming to work for him.

He no longer will let the young men/boys work for him saying they had their chances.They probably want to work there because he has as many as 4 young ladies working depending on the seasonal work required.

He has had several move on to college along the way and return to work the hay season while off from college for the summer even though he incourges them to take classes in the summer.

 Al


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> There is a big difference between being a functional important working part of the household and *being entirely dependent* on another for your lifestyle.


That time passed for the majority of women back in the 60's and 70's.
Being able to fend for yourself isn't related to sex anymore.


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

Bearfootfarm said:


> That time passed for the majority of women back in the 60's and 70's.
> Being able to fend for yourself isn't related to sex anymore.


That time has not passed. I know several women who have not had a job outside the home since they started having children and very little work history before. Their husbands control the money and limit their ability to make financial decsions for themselves. Supporting yourself is also not about what sex you are just how much control you give up to those that do support yourself.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> *That time has not passed*. I know several women who have not had a job outside the home since they started having children and very little work history before.


"For the majority".


> Bearfootfarm said: ↑
> That time passed for the majority of women back in the 60's and 70's.





painterswife said:


> Supporting yourself is also *not about what sex you are* just how much control you give up to those that do support yourself.


That's what I said too.



painterswife said:


> Their husbands control the money and limit their ability to make financial decsions for themselves.


People get to make their own choices.
"Control" issues aren't restricted to just one sex either.


----------



## HDRider (Jul 21, 2011)




----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

HDRider said:


> I got the bread, she won me.


I wish I had thought to say that.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> I think you might be very suprised how well some spouses tie up the money in ways that spousal support is minimal and community property is almost non existent.


Wouldn't that problem really have to begin before the relationship?
Wouldn't it still be a choice the woman made herself?

It's starting to sound like a general "male bashing".


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

Bearfootfarm said:


> Wouldn't that problem really have to begin before the relationship?
> Wouldn't it still be a choice the woman made herself?
> 
> It's starting to sound like a general "male bashing".


I made it quite clear in my first post and subsequent ones that giving up control of your financial future is an individual problem. Sorry you did not understand that. Others understand and now that I have reiterated the point hopefully you will as well.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> I made it quite clear in my first post and subsequent ones that *giving up control of your financial future *is *an individual problem.* Sorry you did not understand that. Others understand and now that I have reiterated the point hopefully you will as well.


Not everyone sees it as a "problem".
It's an individual's choice.

Do women who stop working while their husband still work have a "problem", or must everyone always work in a manner that meets your approval?

Wouldn't a spouse who has no "real" job also be dependent on the one who does for the insurance benefits?

Is that a "problem" or just "life"?

If the people themselves aren't complaining, how is it a "problem"?


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

[


Bearfootfarm said:


> Not everyone sees it as a "problem".
> It's an individual's choice.
> 
> Do women who stop working while their husband still work have a "problem", or must everyone always work in a manner that meets your approval?
> ...


No problem until there is one. No spouse ever has this problem. Great, all solved in your world.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> No problem until there is one. No spouse ever has this problem. Great, all solved in your world.


Some like to create their own problems.

I didn't say there is "never" a problem.
Let's keep it honest.


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

Well, I know spouses with this problem. It is a problem for them and I hope discussing it with others will put a little light on it for our younger generations.


----------



## alleyyooper (Apr 22, 2005)

A friend of mine owns a beef operation farm In Wisconsin. Has been about 22 years he moved there from Michigan. When he first got there he tried to hire young high school men/boys thru the high school ag department. He was paying pretty good, so good in fact I told him I was about to buy a travel trailer and move to his farm for summer work.

Those young men/boys would just not show up when there was hay to be put in thre barn. They were abuseing his tractors and other equipment too.
Then one day a young lady came to his house and asked for a job on the farm. that lead to more young women coming to work for him.

He no longer will let the young men/boys work for him saying they had their chances.They probably want to work there because he has as many as 4 young ladies working depending on the seasonal work required.

He has had several move on to college along the way and return to work the hay season while off from college for the summer even though he incourges them to take classes in the summer.

 Al


----------



## tripletmom (Feb 4, 2005)

@painterswife, your original post was 'who's the breadwinner' but YOU have morphed it into something weird. I feel like you're trying to pick a fight with those not winning the bread...


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

tripletmom said:


> @painterswife, your original post was 'who's the breadwinner' but you have morphed into something weird. I feel like you're trying to pick a fight with those not winning the bread...


I responded to others posts to me. Should I have not?


----------



## alleyyooper (Apr 22, 2005)

Appears they have lead you in to a non winable battle.
But this isn't the first time is it?

 Al


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

alleyyooper said:


> Appears they have lead you in to a non winable battle.
> But this isn't the first time is it?
> 
> Al


The win is the discussion itself.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> The win is the discussion itself.


There is no "win" when there never was a "fight".

Again, some create "problems" where there never was one to begin with. 

It's all just a discussion.


----------



## painterswife (Jun 7, 2004)

Discussion is a win. There does not need to be a fight for a win.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

painterswife said:


> Discussion is a win. *There does not need to be a fight *for a win.


I've said that many times.



> *Definition of win*
> (Entry 1 of 2)
> 
> transitive verb
> ...


----------



## birdman1 (Oct 3, 2011)

its just I ; but the lands paid off , health care is covered ,and i get a retirement pension that covers bills .


----------



## barnbilder (Jul 1, 2005)

If you want bread, you need to pick a winner.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

barnbilder said:


> If you want bread, you need to pick a winner.


Are you trying to buy an election?
Are you Russian?


----------



## Miss Kay (Mar 31, 2012)

We both worked and now both retired and both have retirement income. We actually work harder now than ever but enjoy it so much more.

As for the whole debate about being dependent, I know way too many poor women who go from man to man (usually losers so not sure why they wanted them) and have a baby by each only to end up living with mom in between relationships. Work at the sonic just doesn't support a woman and several kids. I think everyone needs an education or skill they can use to support themselves and children should they have to. Maybe it's just this culture here in in rural Arkansas but these folks seriously need to learn to be independent from the government and family. I think team work is great when one can hold down the fort while the other pays the bills and provides insurance. Just always have a plan B just in case!


----------



## whiterock (Mar 26, 2003)

what birdman said


----------



## hiddensprings (Aug 6, 2009)

Both hubby and I work. He usually makes more than I do, but there are years when I made more than him. He supports me if I decide to try a different career field, and I support him when he wants to do the same. I know if something ever happened, I could go it alone because I am capable. He could too. It works for us!


----------



## wdcutrsdaughter (Dec 9, 2012)

you guys are funny with the same old same old back and forth. 

my 2 cents on all of this - I supported myself for many years before I met DH. He also was on his own. Now we are a team and quality of life has increased for both of us. Teamwork makes the dreamwork.

Something else about bread winning that we've observed with some married couples we know that are in their 30s. They don't combine accounts. They keep things separate and split the bills. Wouldn't work for us, works for them. Just showing things are always evolving.


----------



## newfieannie (Dec 24, 2006)

I fully admit I couldn't have been a bread winner. I don't know what I could have done. all my brothers went to university but I didn't. dad wanted me to stay home and I can honestly say I was happy learning to cook with mom and helping dad outside.

I went from my fathers house to a house he bought for my husband and I. years later we moved to ns. bought some land and that's all I wanted to do . work on that and in my home.i still do that but in a different home. I certainly don't know how I would earn a living now . darn good thing I don't have to. ~Georgia


----------



## Irish Pixie (May 14, 2002)

Back in the day, I earned more than Mr. Pixie, unless he was a working a lot of overtime. He provided the excellent health, vision, and dental insurance, and still does. And I handle all the money, bills, investments, etc. anyway. He doesn't want to have anything to do with it. 

I have my own money, and could absolutely support myself in the style that I have become accustomed.


----------



## empofuniv (Oct 14, 2005)

We have tried to be a team throughout our 50+ yrs of marriage. Both retired now. Both have our federal pensions, his larger than mine because he had a much higher skillset than I did. He has a montly benefit from the VA due to the damage that has been caused by Agent Orange. We used his Thrift Savings Plan (think Federal version of 401K) to pay cash for our retirement home, and we draw a smallish monthly amount from mine for pocket money. Both have Soc Sec and his is about $11 a month more than mine. It would have been a lot more than mine, but I continued working after the government bought his job and retired him. I worked for 7 more yrs after he retired. I've always been the financial person in the family and handle all the bank accounts, investments etc and have managed to stash away enough that I think our children are going to be pretty darn surprised when it comes time to have the Great Yard Sale. We have lived debt free for decades now. I know that if he goes before me, I'll have to cut back considerable. But I'm sure I can handle it financially as long as I can keep the lights on and the taxes paid. A lady who worked for my command and taught financial classes used to tell us that if on the day she passes and all of her bills are paid, that if there is so much as $1 left over in her checking account she didn't use her money wisely. Living that close to the edge is just too scary for me.


----------



## wr (Aug 10, 2003)

newfieannie said:


> I fully admit I couldn't have been a bread winner. I don't know what I could have done. all my brothers went to university but I didn't. dad wanted me to stay home and I can honestly say I was happy learning to cook with mom and helping dad outside.
> 
> I went from my fathers house to a house he bought for my husband and I. years later we moved to ns. bought some land and that's all I wanted to do . work on that and in my home.i still do that but in a different home. I certainly don't know how I would earn a living now . darn good thing I don't have to. ~Georgia


And yet, I've seen pictures of your wonderful baking and decorating. Under different circumstances, I feel you would have easily had the skills to open a little cafe or bakery.


----------



## Evons hubby (Oct 3, 2005)

newfieannie said:


> I fully admit I couldn't have been a bread winner. I don't know what I could have done. all my brothers went to university but I didn't. dad wanted me to stay home and I can honestly say I was happy learning to cook with mom and helping dad outside.
> 
> I went from my fathers house to a house he bought for my husband and I. years later we moved to ns. bought some land and that's all I wanted to do . work on that and in my home.i still do that but in a different home. I certainly don't know how I would earn a living now . darn good thing I don't have to. ~Georgia


If need should arise.... We have a spare room and I love to eat! I'm sure arrangements could be made.


----------



## GTX63 (Dec 13, 2016)

Silly rabbits.
So many think being the breadwinner means being the primary provider in a household and woe is the stay at homer/part timer that brings home a pittance and depends on the other for their "support."
What my SO brings into our home exposes the dollar for the paper it is.
Without her skills, gifts, and talents I would starve emotionally. She has elevated my standard of living as it relates to marriage, and I could never exist in another relationship without such luxury.
Living with the idea that one is beholden to their spouse over income speaks more about the perception of individual choice and is just a wee bit uninformed when it comes to what "bread" each person truly brings into a relationship.


----------



## Irish Pixie (May 14, 2002)

The point of the discussion was that there are partners/spouses that do not have access to the family money, and could not support themselves if the partner withdrew support.

No one was bashing men, judging stay at home moms, etc. It would be more interesting to think that tho.


----------



## mreynolds (Jan 1, 2015)

Irish Pixie said:


> The point of the discussion was that there are partners/spouses that do not have access to the family money, and could not support themselves if the partner withdrew support.
> 
> No one was bashing men, judging stay at home moms, etc. It would be more interesting to think that tho.


I guess that went over my head then. I can relate because when my brother in law had a heart attack I had to loan me sister 100 dollars until she could find out what bank he used and the account numbers. 

Never could understand that because my sister has a degree in accounting and is good with the money. But she is partly to blame for that too.


----------



## Irish Pixie (May 14, 2002)

Did he allow her access? That’s the issue, I handle everything financial but that’s the way Mr Pixie wants it. 

Many partners are not allowed access, the other controls it all. Some have tied it up so the other can’t legally touch it.


----------



## mreynolds (Jan 1, 2015)

Irish Pixie said:


> Did he allow her access? That’s the issue, I handle everything financial but that’s the way Mr Pixie wants it.
> 
> Many partners are not allowed access, the other controls it all. Some have tied it up so the other can’t legally touch it.


That I don't know for sure. It appears he didn't because she didn't even know there name of the bank. 

She is on her own now and doing just fine though. 

My wife and I have several accounts. I control the emergency and investment accounts. She controls the main and the other accounts. She pays the bills and I pay for emergencies. I always talk to her about any investment we might try and if we do one she knows every thing about it. 

If either was to drop off the face of the Earth it wouldn't be an issue for the other to pick up the slack on any of it. This works for us so one of us doesn't have to do it all.


----------



## emdeengee (Apr 20, 2010)

Breadwinner or bread maker - equally important. Even in my lifespan the place for women in society has changed dramatically. Women we grew up with had to leave their jobs when they married - not a choice - and men felt it was a real knock at their manhood if their wife worked outside the home. And yet there were thousands of women who did work even back then but many in rather hidden jobs. And of course the way magazines, TV and movies portrayed the rose coloured life back then it was a dream world where the woman stayed home and catered to every need of the kids and man. 

The general belief is that women wanted to be in the work place - and many did especially those with professions and training that gave them a salary that was worth the effort - but the reality is that as things became more and more expensive women had to work just to help keep the family. And access to education made women completely competitive. 

And of course birth control allowed women to make the choice about how many kids they wanted. In the past women had to stay at home because there were so many kids to look after.

I have to admit that I laugh at men who support the concept that women do not deserve to be paid the same as a man for the same work and experience. They just don't see that it is their wives, partners and daughters who are being cheated as well and that in the end the men themselves are being cheated.

We have always worked as a team - everything belongs to both of us and we decide together what we want. Sometimes I earned more, sometimes he did. He supported me with furthering education and I supported him. 

Many couples keep their money separate and that is fine if it suits them. However I have noticed in my work that many split the bills 50/50. That is actually not fair - it should be divided by percent. The higher earner pays more. Otherwise the lower earner never has an equal ability to use their left over money for other things and that can lead to real resentment.


----------



## Bearfootfarm (Jul 13, 2006)

Irish Pixie said:


> The point of the discussion was that there are partners/spouses that do not have access to the family money, and could not support themselves if the partner withdrew support.
> 
> *No one was bashing men, judging stay at home moms, etc.* It would be more interesting to think that tho.


Opinions vary.


----------



## macmad (Dec 22, 2012)

We don’t eat bread at our home.


----------



## GTX63 (Dec 13, 2016)

I don't care who brings home our bread, I know who butters it...


----------



## Lisa in WA (Oct 11, 2004)

I was a SAHM since my oldest daughter was born but went back to work part time several times over the years when we needed extra. That’s not been necessary for a long time now.

Several years ago my husband was diagnosed with bipolar type 2 and while he’s doing great on medication and likely will for the rest of his life he wanted me to be protected “just in case” and because I was concerned and so we visited our estate attorney and banker and accounts were made in my name with enough funds to last me well beyond my projected life span and in the same lifestyle we both live.

SAHMs can be very vulnerable in divorce situations and while that isn’t a worry for us, I appreciate having my own accounts. Kind of fun, learning about investing my own money. My husband is a successful trader so I’m learning from the best.

While my oldest daughter has chosen to be a SAHM, she is running a Business from home and can easily return to the work force (she’s a CPA and forensic accountant) any time she chooses. Youngest is almost done with law school so thankful they are (or can be) financially independent.


----------

