# Have you ever......



## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

Packed it up, and moved to a new state......without knowing a soul in the place where you moved?


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## SimplerTimez (Jan 20, 2008)

Yep.  Although it was technically still in the same state, just the opposite side of the state. 

When I bought my place after my husband's death, I moved from NE TN to NW TN. I only knew three people in NE TN, in addition to my husband when we lived there. The only person I knew at the new place was the Realtor, whom I had never met until after the closing.

By the time that I had to leave it, I knew most of my neighbors (closest one a half-mile away), the country store owners, the Mennonites that ran the dry goods store, and many others just through the course of business.

It didn't bother me, as I am not particularly social person, and I was very early in my grief - didn't want others around.

In small towns, it doesn't take long to meet other people once you leave your house. In my situation, people often just stopped in my driveway to come introduce themselves - including the mail carrier. There were good people there.

You can do it, if you want to 

~ST


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## nehimama (Jun 18, 2005)

Many times! Even moved to different countries! Having served 27 years in the USAF, such move were unavoidable. However, the "Air Force Family" was always there to help smooth the transition.


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## craftychick (Nov 11, 2013)

I've moved to completely new states, some of them were places where I had never ever seen before; 18 times in my lifetime, the last move was just 5 yrs ago. Everywhere I have landed, I've made friends through the schools where I volunteered and also at church festivals & craft fairs. Some of my best memories are of the gypsy part of my life. The experiences and friendships I've made along the way are real treasures.


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## BetsyK in Mich (May 14, 2002)

I have not, live in the house I was born in, so have not wandered far. However, if I had the resources I do now and was 46 instead of 66 I'd do it in a heartbeat. Have always loved the west.


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## sustainabilly (Jun 20, 2012)

When we moved here. The in-laws were over in Knoxville, but that's about an hour and a half away. We didn't see them much at all. Had to contend with the usual yankee bashing, yada, yada, yada... No big deal, most of the time. Once people find out you're struggling to make ends meet and get ahead, just like everyone else, they accept you. It's cool. One thing, of all the places I've lived, I've never met more folks that were willing to 'hep' you out than I've met here.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

I love south/eastern TN, western NC....I love the mountains (well, not way up high, I like the valley-ish areas).

I love the Knoxville area. Beautiful scenery, people, etc.
Warmer than where I am (N. Ind)....

However, I went to Florida early Nov........
I just don't know if the heat and humidity would wear me out?
Maybe a couple more trips down will help? 

I want to be somewhere where I can have a little home, some land to garden, some chickens...and enough space that IF I wanted a cow, I could have one.
Far enough away from the big city, the noise, crime, lights, etc BUT close enough that I can drive to the big city so I can work!! (Bartend, Serve, restaurant)

I don't want a trailer or manufactured home....and I am finding that in the Knoxville area, in my price range, that's about all there is!! 

I am just a chicken I suppose....stuck in the rut of complacency,.....but growing more and more restless every day.
Just curious if others over 40 just packed it up and headed out......


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## foxfiredidit (Apr 15, 2003)

To Tennessee in '92. The backwoods down near Booger Woods near the big bend in the river, very rural to say the least. It was quite a change from my really deep south roots (climate and culture). At that time there wasn't a bridge nearby to cross the river so crossings were made by ferry, one near my place, and another 20 miles south. I learned a lot, and left a lot when I moved again. After almost 8 years in that place, moving away from my cabin in Martin Hollow to another new place was the hardest move I've ever had to make.

So lay me down
in this sweet 'Bama ground,
have someone sing
Amazing Grace over me.

But if I'm just gone 
and no where found,
you'll know
I'm back in Tennessee.


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## Fowler (Jul 8, 2008)

Yes, many times.


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## dustyroad (Nov 13, 2013)

When I was 43 I went to China and had no plans to return, just keep going. The strangest feeling was when I handed over my car keys to my sister at the airport. No house keys, no car keys and nothing that needed to be locked. Good but odd.
The arrangements for my daughters school weren't what we needed so I wound up having to come back but not willingly. Six months of eye opening intellectual whiplash. Very complicated. 
Certainly one of the best adventures of my life and I don't regret even one second or dollar.


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## Terri in WV (May 10, 2002)

Yep, did it 6 years ago with young kids(5,7,8) and my oldest, that is handicapped. I was 43. Didn't know a soul and have never regretted a day of it.

I'm now looking again, either in another part of Ky or Va. When I find the place, I'll know it(hopefully).


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## homebody (Jan 24, 2005)

I found the climate differences the most challenging. I am past ready to go in a southern direction but will have to adjust to excessive heat again after a 20 year absence. People are basically the same in the state where we lived, some snobs, most ordinary people. I liked Alabama the best, would go back in a heartbeat if DH would.


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## L.A. (Nov 15, 2007)

Does college count,,or,,out on the road for months at a time ????


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## sidepasser (May 10, 2002)

Yes, I moved to Huntsville in 2010 after accepting a new position and had one week to get moved and report to work. I did not know one soul in Huntsville personally and had no idea where to live.

I did have a cousin in Athens but she also had just moved and she didn't know anyone either. As an Army brat I was used to "up and moving" and not knowing anyone in the new base, so it didn't bother me too much.

Now I know lots of people, but none are real "close"..I never have made friends easily as I got used to moving too much over the years as a kid. I did meet my DH but met him online - lol..

I do know that there are a LOT of single men up here..jeez, one could have a date with a different man every night and twice on Sunday..wonder if it is because most of the folks here are military or ex military? Where I moved from, there were very, very few single men (and those were divorced with a lot of baggage, same as the women - small town, you know everyone and their baggage)..


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## Guest (Dec 9, 2013)

Oh yes..and I'm tired of it now..I make friends everywhere I go, and that's great..yet I would very much enjoy longevity in one place..


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## calliemoonbeam (Aug 7, 2007)

Several times, when I was younger and healthier. I always found it exciting, invigorating and, for lack of a better word, liberating. One time I got rid of everything I owned that didn't fit in a Camaro and headed out! I think that was the most exciting time of all.

I'd still do it, given the right opportunity, but would be a little more nervous about finding a good doctor and the actual work of packing, moving and unpacking. It was a lot easier and a lot more fun when I was younger, lol!


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

Numerous times. Have been here for around 20 years, now there's no need for me to stay. Considering Florida, the Cape Coral area STRONGLY, but am open to explore other areas. That's about the largest place I'd be interested in tough.

Although....Gulfcoast Alabama might not be too bad.....

Long as there's fish!

Mon


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

calliemoonbeam said:


> ....It was a lot easier and a lot more fun when I was younger, lol!


You mean, back when you had less? LOL! We do kinda tend to cement ourselves in place after a time...

Mon


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## Twp.Tom (Dec 29, 2010)

No Laura, I have not. I was born in Ohio,and have spent most of my life in a 50 mile radius of where I am presently. My two sisters,and my brother,live about 45 min. away.And I really like it here. If I do decide to leave here,I would really like to live in Pa.,or WV.-near the forest,and mountains of course.I am also very fond of upstate Michigan. If I migrate anywhere,I want to be back in the woods-way back! As long as I can get to a trauma unit,in case of an emergency(think helicopter ride).


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## simi-steading (Sep 27, 2012)

Hey Laura... take a look at my signature.. 

I've moved around most all my life. My wife and I are getting ready to quit high paying jobs, move to the hills, and hopefully find jobs after we get there... We really don't have much for money set back to survive on once we move.... We're just throwing caution to the wind and hoping we've scored some good enough Karma to get us through... 

I've moved many times not knowing a sole, not having any money, and what little I owned in the back of a small pick-up.. I always managed to land fairly square on my feet.. .

Sacry, yes.... but it's better than sitting around looking at the same scenery all your life and wondering what if... at least that's the way we feel about it...


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## sherry in Maine (Nov 22, 2007)

yes, in the US Army. And, after that, too, a few times. It's ok, you can do it.


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

Laura, if you're interested in Florida, you might consider going down in July and August which I believe are the hottest months. Humidity, depends on where you are....just because there's ocean doesn't mean it's unbearably humid...only in places 

Mon


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## roadless (Sep 9, 2006)

Yep. I was part gypsy in my younger years. ...who knows maybe I'll do it again!


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## Brighton (Apr 14, 2013)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> Packed it up, and moved to a new state......without knowing a soul in the place where you moved?


I have done that four times actually, and since you don't seem to have any close friends or family (other than your kids) where you currently live, why not??


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## CountryWannabe (May 31, 2004)

LOL. When DH was made an offer he couldn't refuse I packed up and moved to a whole different country where I didn't know a soul.

I have never regretted it. 

Mary


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## Jaclynne (May 14, 2002)

I've moved all my life, but I'd rather not. I expect to move, maybe once more, closer to family, or to build a new family unit. 
I will say, as an adult, I've always been blessed with the very best neighbors a person could ask for.


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## SimplerTimez (Jan 20, 2008)

frogmammy said:


> Laura, if you're interested in Florida, you might consider going down in July and August which I believe are the hottest months. Humidity, depends on where you are....just because there's ocean doesn't mean it's unbearably humid...only in places
> 
> Mon


I don't mean to be disagreeable, but I'm a Florida native, and humidity is EVERYWHERE here. I'll be gone from here (again) five minutes after my financial goals are accomplished. It's been in the 80's here nearly every day this week - humidity right now is 86%. 

That said, a bazillion people move here every day, so something draws them here, lol! 

The Northern part of the state can be more rural, and there are some places mid-state as well; depends on what you need to do for work if you aren't retired. Property is expensive here, especially the land part - but I realize that is all relevant, depending on where you are coming from. 

I lived here all of my life until I hit my 40's - I then moved to GA, VA and TN and discovered seasons! I love them. We have two - heatstroke and tourist (oh, and hurricane). There are some positives - you can grow (if you amend our sandy soil) in every month except the hottest three (July-Sept). You don't need winter coats or boots or fuzzy caps. I never run the heat. You're never far away from a bay, the Gulf or the Atlantic. We have extremely lush vegetation. Believe it or not though, green all of the time can get boring. I live 35 miles from work- it takes me an hour to get there. Lots of people love it here, I am not one of them :/ Maybe I am not old enough yet, lol! They call us the home of the newly wed and the nearly dead - at least the section that I live in. 

If I can help you LZ5, or Frogmammy, feel free to drop me a PM. And LZ5, if you move here before I leave dust trails, you'll know at least ONE person in the state 

~ST


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## Skittles2u (Apr 13, 2005)

I am wanting to retire and up and move.... whether I actually have the nerve I don't know yet; but I certainly want to leave and live more rural

(as you can see I haven't posted much), but thought I'd try to respond a little more frequently.


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

ST, I live in St Louis, MO, and we get some hefty humidity here, too. Not quite as much as when I lived in Houston, I don't think. Surprisingly, Corpus Christi, TX did not seem as humid as either here or Houston.

I lived in Ft Worth/Dallas and it wasn't much for humidity but did get a touch hot.

I've lived in mid-Michigan/New York, northern Indiana, and Lubbock/Wichita Falls, TX and I do NOT like cold and wet or snowy!

Mon


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## SimplerTimez (Jan 20, 2008)

FM, 

Florida certainly doesn't have the corner on humidity, that's for sure. I've been to TX, but not the other states. I want cold and snowy, lol! 

I've been looking at MN, ME and WI, as well as some in VA. The heat has always bothered me, even as a child. I always had nosebleeds when young. When I was in the cold (for me, cold = -2), I was happy and invigorated. The heat just makes me want to take a nap, lol!

~ST


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

Believe me, MN will keep you cool!

Mon


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## moxiegal62 (Nov 28, 2013)

Yes. I did that same thing just back in 08'. I moved 1,000 miles east, from Kansas City to South Carolina. I knew no one. I relocated here for jobs and better weather.


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

frogmammy said:


> Believe me, MN will keep you cool!
> 
> Mon


Serously!

When you can CHEER because the temperature has risen to a minus 17...you need to live WAY down south!

Mon


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## moxiegal62 (Nov 28, 2013)

I was also a military wife for 15 years. We moved quite often and I loved it! That's because, where I grew up...nobody EVER moves! They are still in the same homes...same neighborhoods. Same everything.


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## WhyNot (Jun 21, 2011)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> Packed it up, and moved to a new state......without knowing a soul in the place where you moved?


Five times.


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## lonelytree (Feb 28, 2008)

21 years in the AF. I moved a few times. Sometimes to foreign countries. Usually, there was at least someone that I had worked with before.


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## AlaskaSue (Mar 27, 2013)

Why yes, that is how this former Cali-Okie-Texan has been an Alaskan for 43 years! Dad came home from work one day and asked Mamma and us 6 kids if we wanted to build a pool out back, move to Australia, or move to Alaska (we knew no one in Australia or Alaska). It was unanimous, we began preparing and studying for the year ahead of the move and all 8 of us, with 2 dogs and a cat drove from Corpus Christi to Anchorage in 1970, where we all graduated from high school, the folks moved to Kodiak Island in '72, my sons and grandchildren are here. 
We knew no one and all we knew was what we read but boy! Am I ever glad Daddy asked us that question that day. They were brave people, my parents, God bless them!


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

http://www.zillow.com/homes/for_sal....153748,31.355982,-82.773743_rect/7_zm/0_mmm/

By far my favorite.
Fowler, you should love the address.......


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## viggie (Jul 17, 2009)

I hope to some day. I am really ready for a warmer climate. But it's historically taken me a long time to find work, and my home is unusual being a little granny house in an area with larger homes, so it'll be tricky to line everything up. Especially since I'll need to move as soon as I find work, and then start looking for a place to live, and hope I find it before the gov decides to take capital gains...worry worry worry


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## Wavertree (Dec 1, 2013)

Sometimes you find a place and your souls speaks and says "yes, this is it". You can go away and try to live in other places but your soul knows the truth.
I like fresh water and open skies. I like peaceful noise. Pollution is a silent thief. It leans on you and tugs at your will.

I took a wrong turn and ended up in the city for a few years. A few months back, I had one of those 'why am I still here?" moments and decided to get on with the business of living my life.

My land is in a town of 95 people.....doesnt matter if I know them or not. That area is where I have spent the most peaceful years of my life. My happiness comes from being comfortable in my surroundings.


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## thestartupman (Jul 25, 2010)

Yes, I have. About 2 years ago, my wife and I left Vancouver Washington area and moved to south central MO. We didn't know a person in the state before we came. We miss our kids and grandkids, but we still have a hope that we can get them to move too. We really enjoy it here though.


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## azuresky (Feb 26, 2012)

Yep. Went from La. to California to N. Carolina to Tennessee and finally settled in SC. Been here 17 years. Thinking of moving to another city next year so I will be closer to work.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

azuresky said:


> Yep. Went from La. to California to N. Carolina to Tennessee and finally settled in SC. Been here 17 years. Thinking of moving to another city next year so I will be closer to work.


What part of SC??


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## azuresky (Feb 26, 2012)

Hi Laura, I currently live in Aiken County but I am looking to move in the next year or two toward Columbia because I work there. I've been perusing the land/small house market. I'm sooooo ready to get back onto some land-even if its just an acre of two.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

So there are SHELVES of books on "how to be divorced after 40".
Seems that all of those books are published by women who:

1. Got a HUGE fat daddy settlement from the divorce, and are set!

2. Already had careers that pay fat daddy bucks.

Either way, I am struggling to find a book written by a 'simple' person....
Something I can relate too, seeing as I am a bartender w/o any degree.....

I have SO many things to do, I get overwhelmed, shut down, and stay in my rut. 
It's manageable, and predictable.
However I am SICK of that rut and ready for a big change.
BIG change.

Something my daughters recruiter said stuck with me:

You never know what you can do until you challenge yourself.
We are here to challenge her, daily.

I want some of that action......I think I am ready for the challenge.

I can find a job anywhere. I'm a bartender / server.
I am loving the area between Charleston SC and Savannah GA.

I just don't know where to start....


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## elkhound (May 30, 2006)

this should start with prayer...ask for guidance.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

Seems lately all my calls are going straight to VM.
I'll keep trying though...;-)


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## elkhound (May 30, 2006)

maybe the lesson is patience??


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## craftychick (Nov 11, 2013)

Where to start? Do what Elkhound suggested and then get online and find both an area with lots of job potential and also where there are some good apartments.
I would suggest renting for at least 6 mos in a new area; once you're there you can then drive around, talk to people and get a feel for the area.
Once you have established yourself in your new community ie; job & a few acquantances, it will be much easier as well as much safer to actually consider buying a place. By safer, I mean not buying on emotion only but actually finding a place that suits your needs for room as well as safety and accessibility to work & stores. 

I bought a place years ago that looked perfect; I had only been able to fly down for a few days to check it and the area out.
I lived to regret that quick decision. I learned it takes more than a few days to really know if the neighbors, area mindset and community are going to mesh with your needs and your own values. 6 mos of living in the area would have told me so much and I wouldn't have made a mistake that I had to live with for 5 yrs before getting the chance to sell and move on.

I hope you are able to spread your wings and fly off on a new adventure. Now is your time to do what works for you; your family is raised and you'll be free of the emotional drain that from what you've posted has happened in your marriage.


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## moxiegal62 (Nov 28, 2013)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> What part of SC??





azuresky said:


> Hi Laura, I currently live in Aiken County but I am looking to move in the next year or two toward Columbia because I work there. I've been perusing the land/small house market. I'm sooooo ready to get back onto some land-even if its just an acre of two.



Hey...we are locals! We could actually meet in person!! :happy2:


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## Terri in WV (May 10, 2002)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> I want some of that action......I think I am ready for the challenge.
> 
> I can find a job anywhere. I'm a bartender / server.
> I am loving the area between Charleston SC and Savannah GA.
> ...


From what you've posted here ^^^, I think you've already started! 

You want some of the action.

Change think to believe you are ready for the challenge.

You know you can find a job anywhere.

You are loving an area.

Now you have to decide what's holding you back and when you want to soar.

It can be very scary to think of such a move, but it can also be exhilarating. I don't regret for a minute, the move I made. It was very freeing and I expect the next one will be too. And if I can do it with 4 kids in tow, I'm sure that you can too!


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> ...I just don't know where to start....


Suitcase and a roadmap would be good. If you'd prefer to travel lighter, ditch the roadmap.

Mon


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## Shrek (May 1, 2002)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> Packed it up, and moved to a new state......without knowing a soul in the place where you moved?


 For a few years working through a temp agency I worked 8 months and spent 4 months however far half of my road trip vacation stake took me.

Once at the halfway point of my road stake I would find work in a bowling alley, truck stop or such and work and hang out until 4 months passed then headed home after my working vacation. One year I came back home with my complete road stake intact and enough extra to only have to work 6 months through the temp agency.


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