# Dealing with school question



## hoggie (Feb 11, 2007)

OK - I am spitting nails right now.

DD came out of school late today. It appears that her science class were given some work to do 15 mins before the end of school. 5 mins before the end of school they were told they wouldn't be allowed home until they had finished it. So DD came out of school 10 mins late.

Now, I appreciate that teachers want the work finished - but I am furious that they wer ekept behind with no prior warning given, for something so trivial. They could have been kept in the following break time, or even the next dayh with parents having been notified first. As it was DD told the teacher that she had been specifically told that I needed to be somewhere to which the teacher responded that she had every right to keep them in!!

This to me is wrong on lots of counts - not least because my DD is chronologically challenged anyway, and I am working REALLY hard with her to teach her the importance of timekeeping and punctuality. She is not TOTALLY confused because, in her eyes, the teachers say it is absolutely VITAL that she get to school in time for the register in the mornings, but it is perfectly acceptable for the teachers to make ME late for an appointment in the evening - where's the logic in that!!!

I am blazing - but unsure what to do next. I have typed out three letters to the head of dept already LOL I am tempted to take DD in to school 10 mins late tomorrow and say that that is the 10 mins she was late out today. I am even toying with telling DD that next time she should just get up and say she is going and that the teacher needs to speak to me in the playground about it.

I am so angry. But once I calm down - how would you deal - I am fed up ;with talking to this teacher about pettiness regarding my DD 

Any ideas

TIA

hoggie


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## PNP Katahdins (Oct 28, 2008)

Did any other kids come out late for the same reason? 

First make sure your DD is explaining the situation correctly, especially since she appears to have an issue understanding the passage of time, and then talk to the teacher's supervisor. Something doesn't sound quite right.

Peg


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## jamala (May 4, 2007)

We had this trouble at the private school my kids attended before homeschooling. Only some days it was up to 20 minutes late! I spoke with the teacher who didn't care that I was being made late in the afternoons. Then spoke with the headmaster who also didn't care. "Things happen" they said. I would go talk to the teacher and if that gets you no where then go to the principal.


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## hoggie (Feb 11, 2007)

Yes, there were quite a few kids that were late coming out, I will find out more today at school from the other parents - DD is very clear about what happened and she is very articulate so I have no reason to doubt what she has told me. Her time-keeping is bad, in that she gets distracted and starts thinking about "other things" when she should be watching the time, and she doesnt' totally see the need for being anywhere on time - but that is getting so much better and she is really working at it. She kept getting in trouble for being late, which just discouraged her - but now we have been working on it as a "skill she needs to learn" she is doing much better with it?

I am starting to have quite serious issues with this teacher - I questioned something a few weeks ago, and since then she seems to have made DD a bit of a target for lots of very petty stuff - and things that are really none of her business. She can't fault DD on her school work, or behaviour, so she picks on really silly stuff.

But I will step back and take some deep breaths before I rush in - I will ask the other mums at school what their kids told them before I say too mucn to the school.

I think I will also phone the dept and find out whether they are actually allowed to keep them back - it always used to be that they had to give the parents notice. All the facts in my hand from both sides would help

Thank you for your answers 

hoggie


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## nebula5 (Feb 4, 2003)

If this is the first time this has ever happened, I don't think I'd make a big fuss over 10 minutes. It does not sound like your daughter is being singled out, in this case. If it happens again, I think I would call the headmaster, to see what the school's policy is about end of day.
How would the school react if you were 10 minutes late?


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

Your only solution is home school.
Otherwise you are at the whims of the teachers, and administration.
Period.


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## mainegirl (Feb 21, 2011)

as a teacher, i would offer this: be sure you have all of your facts before you go in guns ablazing....going all out on incorrect information is hard crow to eat, hot or cold. If your facts are correct and the teacher told the students they could not leave until the assingment was finished, then it was unprofessional and a bad call. I understand being frustrated at the end of the day and wanting to get the assignment done, but parents and kids have lives and commitments outside of school and it is disrespectful to think that your assignment overrides those commitments. There are really good teachers out there and there are some really bad ones. Maybe she realized her hasty decision after it was done, maybe she didn't. Grant the grace of a bad decision and presume positive intentions when you address your concerns. but be sure to address them. they fester if you don't. Public schools are not the enemy, as some would have you think. Lack of time, resources and support are the enemy. I choose to spend more time with your children than my own Mon-Fri. because I LOVE showing them the world. (mine stay with family who show them the world. best of both, i think)


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## mekasmom (Jan 19, 2010)

hoggie said:


> I am so angry. But once I calm down - how would you deal - I am fed up ;with talking to this teacher about pettiness regarding my DD
> 
> Any ideas
> 
> ...


I would homeschool, but if you want your child in ps then you will have to deal with the teacher. If she is that bad, then demand your daughter be moved to another teacher's class. If they don't do it, then go to the supt, and finally the school board. Keeping kids late like that without warning is a big deal due to bus schedules, baby sitter schedules, and the fear of the child being abducted because she didn't come home on time.


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## pheasantplucker (Feb 20, 2007)

As a former teacher, I'd say, yeah, the teacher probably should have gone about things differently, and you have a valid point. My suggestion is calmly explain to the teacher why this is unacceptable and that you expect that it will not happen again. I think if you approach the teacher in a less hostile way, you'll see results. If you go in with both barrels blazing, most people will resist instead of being receptive. Also, I am not perfect...I made some errors in judgment. I always appreciated a parent who went directly to me to express questions or concerns instead of immediately going to my principal or to the superintendent. That's my $.02. (and I disagree with those who say homeschooling is your only option)


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