# Christmas and being single...



## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Is anyone else struggling with it being Christmas time and being single? I have had a hard time at the holidays for quite some time now. A couple of years ago we had family over for Christmas and it filled my house to over flowing. All of the Aunts, Uncles, Cousins came over and we made a huge dinner. 

This year is the hardest. My oldest son is in Denver with his girlfriend and her family and my youngest son who lives with me likes our own quiet little world so we are not having a bunch of family here. It is just him and myself this year and it is not even really him. He works on Christmas day this year so it is really just me. I just watched a video a friend of mine put on his facebook this morning. He asked his girlfriend who was a manager at Coscto to marry him and he did it by putting together a video of them and had it broadcast all over the tv's in the store. When the video was over he came out, went on bent knee and asked her if she would marry him. I am not sure why but all of a sudden I am crying. While there is a HUGE part of me that just doesn't want to be with anyone there is also this tiny little part of me that does. And it seems that side is winning today. 

Does any one else struggle like this besides me?


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## elkhound (May 30, 2006)

pray....that helps every situation greatly


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## tambo (Mar 28, 2003)

So sorry Cindilu. Well I was going to give you a hug smilie but I can't find it so here is a hug any way. I'm having Christmas with my sister, her husband,son and his girlfriend. Aww young love and they haven't seen each other since Thanksgiving! I was thinking of this just a few minutes ago. I have spent way more Christmas alone than with someone. It's sad and what's worse is I have grown use to it and that's not a good thing.

Merry Christmas Cindilu. Hugs to you!!


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

You both are sweethearts.


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## Guest (Dec 24, 2012)

May your heart always be joyful
May your song always be sung
And may you stay
Forever young.


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## newfieannie (Dec 24, 2006)

hugs to you Cindi. i dont know why but i thought you had a man.guess i was wrong. all the best.

like Tambo i am use to being alone. my husband travelled all of our married life. then when i was married after that and they were there full time i was never more lonely. my son just dropped in. spent a couple hours with me and gathered up his grub and went on back to his dogs. i'm having fish chowder for tomorrow and a boston cream pie. i have plenty books to read. i do like my own company. ~Georgia.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Georgia, I did have a man but he had a bunch of women on the side lines and I found out about them. He has already moved on to the next girl and is looking for a ring for her. Scary thing is she goes to my home town church and I know a lot of the same people she knows. I have wondered if I should have someone warn her about what he does behind the scene but decided against it. She will learn the hard way on her own the same way I had to learn. 

Good idea on the book to read. Maybe I will get one and do the same tomorrow. Light the candles and do me/book time.


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## starjj (May 2, 2005)

I work this Christmas and all I can do is be thankful I do. For everyone who is alone at anytime it is a terrible thing to not have any family.


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## Terri in WV (May 10, 2002)

Yes, I am struggling very much this year. This is the first year in the six that I have been widowed that it's been really hard. I think that it's because this will be the last year that I have a kid that still believes in the magic of Santa(sort of).

I didn't get my tree up until the 22nd, which is unusual for me and I haven't decorated otherwise. I haven't even done any baking or even making fudge, heck, I've barely planned on anything to eat, other then picking up a turkey and ham. The kids have done nothing but bicker since being off from school. The whole holiday seems off to me.

So, yes, it's been extremely hard this year.


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## dkhern (Nov 30, 2012)

it took a long time to understand the difference between lonelyness and solitude


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Terri, I understand that pain all to well. This year has been a off year for me as well and I finally decorated the tree last night. I even decided to decorate the whole house while I was at it. It is been wonderful having the house to myself and my son and not sharing with all the daycare kids. The decorations I have put up have stayed in the same spots and haven't been picked up and moved all over the house. The house has stayed clean and I haven't had a ton of stuff to clean. I have really enjoyed the break from all of the busy. Now if I could just sleep a ton it would be much better.


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## Terri (May 10, 2002)

I grew up with 35-odd relatives within an easy drive, and we ALL! got together at Christmas time! 

When DH and I moved 1500 miles away to Iowa, it hit me very hard at Christmas time. I was spiraling down, mood wise, when DH suggested we hit he movies because we had opened the gifts and eaten the meal and there was nothing left to do.

Movies worked out wonderfully well. Bright lights, smiling people, and entertainment. My mood quit dropping.

We went every Christmas for a while, until we adapted to quieter Christmases. I now get a new book to set aside until Christmas, and if things start to drag I read it. With candy.


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## vicker (Jul 11, 2003)

I always remember the 1'st Christmas I spent alone in Boston, after moving there. Christmas Eve I decided to go to the neighborhood pub for some company. There was no one there but me and the bar tender LOL!:buds: 
I hope you have a great Christmas in spite of it all Cindy. :*


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Thanks guys, I will be okay. I guess for some reason it just seems hard. If my oldest son was here it wouldn't be so bad. It would feel like I had MY family here at least. But my family is getting old enough to start their own families and that is bringing it down to just me. I am not sure I like the idea of it being just me one little bit. 

You know what they say when you have young kids at home. Don't make them your entire world because one day they will have worlds of their own. Well, I didn't listen and I made them my entire world and guess what. Now my world is changing and I don't do change that well. I think I just need a good book.


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## shanzone2001 (Dec 3, 2009)

I am sorry you are feeling down. I think part of the problem is that you are soooo tired. You wake up so early every day and work with little ones all day. It is exhausting and leaves you very little time for you. I second the book idea, perhaps after you take a nice, long nap! Cuddle up in your pj's and have some Cindilu time!
I wish I was there to give you a big hug! Love you my friend!


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Shan, that could be it. I know I am very tired but unable to sleep. I am still awake at 4am just out of habit. And this is day 4 of having a quiet house and I am just not used to that. I am used to kids kids kids and a phone that rings non stop and always moving around. I am pretty sure that is what is going on, I am in shock is all, lol.


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## shanzone2001 (Dec 3, 2009)

Take some Benedryll...really!


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## Marshloft (Mar 24, 2008)

Sorry cindi that you're feeling so down.
I wished I had words of comfort,,, but I have none.
All I can do is wish you a merry christmas.
GH


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

dear dear Cindilu! I will confess to you I ran down to you-know-who's-house last night...I couldn't come down to Oregon without wishing him a very merry christmas in person. I'm sorry I didnt' have time to come say hi, but I wish with all my heart we could have had some time together, the three of us, at his house or your house...someday soon we will  I thought of you, and thought of you with love when I was down there  

I am so thankful for knowing you Cyn, and you gave me a wonderful gift, KWIM??? in so many ways!!!! I look forward to what is in the future of our sisterhood!!! Love you so so much!!!!


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Girlie, you came down here and didn't say a thing. I could have driven up to you know whos house ya know, drank some and well ya know the rest. That would have been MUCH MUCH needed, the laughing and all. Darn it, now that I think about it that is exactly what I need, teehee. Well, enjoy the drive back if you are already there. 
Yep, this summer we need to go camping and all, lol.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

And Wyld, I have the bad habit of giving away the best ya know. You deserve it girlie so enjoy, lol.


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## summerdaze (Jun 11, 2009)

I don't feel the loniless all the time, thank goodness, but it's there, lurking, and jumps on me every now and then. Especially when I see happy couples strolling arm in arm, or a boisterous, happy family in a resturant or something. I think it gets to us at Christmastime because Christmas is supposed to be that special, almost magical time of the year, and we want so much to share that with someone. Like it would mean more if we had someone to lavish all our love on, decorate the tree with, sip hot chocolate with, go see the Christmas lights with.....We just really, really want to share that special day with someone, and when we don't have anyone, somehow, it just doesn't feel as special.

This year I was feeling pretty happy about Christmas, and I'm trying to make some goodies tonight for tomorrow, but it's tough because, although I've been trying to tell myself that I'm fine, the truth is, I don't feel very well. As in, I feel like I'm coming down with something. I'm headachey and tired, and I'd just really like to curl up and go sleepy now! 

But I'm not ready to give up just yet!
Cindi, I'm sorry you're struggling. I know just what you're talking about. One thing that helps me is to "reach out and touch someone". Make a bunch of connections with friends and loved ones by phone tomorrow. If you can, make visit dates with friends you haven't seen for a while. Write 'em in on your 2013 calendar. If you can find a theater open, go see something funny that's gonna make you laugh your head off for a couple of hours! 
I hope you have a nice Christmas, even if it doesn't go exactly like how you would have liked it to go. I feel ya. ((((HUGS))))


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

cindilu said:


> Girlie, you came down here and didn't say a thing. I could have driven up to you know whos house ya know, drank some and well ya know the rest. That would have been MUCH MUCH needed, the laughing and all. Darn it, now that I think about it that is exactly what I need, teehee. Well, enjoy the drive back if you are already there.
> Yep, this summer we need to go camping and all, lol.


 
aw!!!!!! just goes to show one shouldn't assume friends are super busy a few days before Christmas, getting ready for the big day. rain check, baby? TOTALLY!


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## shebeen (Oct 21, 2011)

WOW! :doh:

I was feeling pretty good about sitting in my little shack and eating some synthetic turkey loaf underneath my one bare 40W lighbulb with my three-legged chiauah here on Christmas Eve.

After reading this thread.....I don't know. :badmood:

Might have to go outside and jam my head into a snowbank. :icecream:


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

Cindi--I don't know if this will make you feel better, but I wish so bad I could spend the day with you tomorrow. I'll see my kids tomorrow(I am thankful), but it will be really hard in the whole big family mix--there is a lot of pain in the air and everyone ignores it. I have a friend's house to stay overnight at(tonight and tomorrow), where I can run away to when it gets too hard, but I will think of being with you and maybe that will help me be strong. Dreading tomorrow, would so rather be out in the woods.

We can't always do what we wish, but it helps to say our wishes and it's important to love our friends. 

Say a prayer for me, I have a three hour drive with my aunt on Wednesday.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

I will do just that Wyld and my heart will be with you when you spend time with your family tomorrow. Stay strong and know and remember who you are in your heart. At some point love will prevail. They are hurting as well, try to remember that and pain lashes out at the closest people they love and that target just might be you tomorrow. Stay strong Chica and think camping trips this summer and the Country Fair. Take care and love ya. 

I am good, tired but good. So stay strong girlfriend.


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

thanks Cyn! yeah, summer's a comin for sure!


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## Shrek (May 1, 2002)

I never feel bad being on my own this time of year. I just enjoy the solitude but I am smart enough to tell gf when she calls right after midnight from her relatives complaining how hectic it is and still one day to go with irritating cousins and distant in laws.

I told her I'm sorry I couldn't be there with her to buffer the craziness but one of us just had to stay here and critter sit.

When she asked why my landline was tied up and she had to call on my cell I told her since I was alone I figured it was a good time to run the many security programs I use and updating on dial up of course takes forever.

Thats my story and I'm sticking to it 

So here I sit listening to her complaints on my ear bud and mic as I offer an occasional grunt or uh uh and hope she doesnt here me typing now and lets me hang up soon so she can go to bed and I can surf over to Pogo to play some Texas Holdem to add to my token count with the audio on


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## farmgal (Nov 12, 2005)

If it's any consolation, many people who have someone are lonelier. Stuck in bad marriages. I think I'd rather be alone than in that sorta situation. 

My family gets together at my mothers for Christmas eve. Lots of brothers sisters, nieces nephews etc. Babies all over. Dad past, 2 christmas now without him. its not the same. I couldnt imagine moving far from everyone. I will leave for winters someday but I would leave after Christmas and come back by Easter. Cant stand the cold anymore.

Reaching out is a great idea. I have a friend who came home from work to his house on fire and lost his wife and 2 daughters, 4 and 6 y/o, 4 days before christmas. His wife got the 2 babies out and ran back for the girls but perished with them. He tells me hanging with him around the holiday makes a huge difference. No mater how many years go by, Christmas is tough.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Oh wow Farmgal, that is awful. I could not imagine having that happen to me. Yes we are have a lot to be thankful for. Thanks for the reminder.


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## WhyNot (Jun 21, 2011)

A big Merry Christmas hug to you, Cindilu.

I had a lot of plans to fill my christmastime and as we know....the best laid plans.....anywhoo...my christmas day today has been by myself, however, blessed with phone calls solid from 7am until...well about 20 minutes ago lol.

I may not "technically" celebrate it, however, it has always been a time of family and my family celebrates. My immediate family that I would wish to celebrate with is over 1000 miles away and the other one person I would really rather be with, I just cannot be with right now. Of course I would love to be with any one of my friends but family and the other person are first on my list (sorry lol).

In any case I did have and still do have the opportunity to spend this day with people who care for me....however, I have chosen not to. Mostly, actually, because I feel like filling my day up with others at this point will be like me trying to not face what I'm feeling right now...which isn't bad stuff at all. I have had many new opportunities revealed to me this weekend, some realizations and etc. that I need to really give a lot of thought to and I am feeling like I need to make a game plan for 2013 and this is truly the first opportunity I have had since July to actually really slow down, not be distracted and be in my own thing for the sake of myself. However selfish that sounds, I don't really care at this point about others' perceptions of my words.

Most years lately I do not purchase or make many presents, just try to help everyone get what it is they need and perhaps a few wants for the kid. My mother and I went together and got my daughter fixed up with a new exhaust for her car from manifold to tailpipe, some professional art pencils she needs to continue her foray into the tattoo and art world and a replacement laptop as hers is threatening to die with the agreement she will send me hers so I can use it for parts to fix mine LOL. Mom is getting a bread book she heard about and raved about for about two weeks straight but refused to buy for herself because it was $30.
Working on making a few things for friends that I will not see until well past the holidays....and I feel good.

Currently I am cooking chicken and rice soup, just got done browning the rice and scooping it into the pot...made some samosas for my christmas brunch along with venison summer sausage and some fresh eggs. Will be making a blue berry smoothie shortly and by then the bananas will be thawed out, going to make banana and cranberry muffins for breakfasts for the week....and have some beans soaking and a ham bone going on the stove to put a dutch oven of homemade baked beans with onion and ham in the oven for this evening.
Enjoying my day nonetheless.

Last night I had a few hours of personal grieving for the losses of the year but today I am collected and looking forward to 2013 and all that it hopes to be so far.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Yeah, today has turned out pretty nice after all. I enjoyed time with my youngest son this morning and really got a kick out of his gift to me. My new boyfriend (pillow) which I have now named FLuffy, and a huge blanket. So it hasn't been bad after all. Got to talk to my oldest son, will set my web cam up later tonight as also get to see, talk to him. So it is all cool. It has been a good day.


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## Laura (May 10, 2002)

I am glad I didn't set any agendas for this season. Low key and low pressure on DD. No haftas, gottas, deadlines, expectations. This is DD's year of having things the way she wants it to be. She is walking in the spirit to the rythms of nature.

As a new grown up there were some things only she could deal with that needed dealing. I left them alone, they are hers. 

DD was up much earlier than I. She made some phone calls. The wrapped boxes of pebbles were labeled with the gifts she's received this year before I awoke. These are the gifts she is grateful for this year and especially this season.

Love, safety, friends, hope, wisdom, health, knowledge, peace of mind, joy, discernment, clarity, healing and faith.

What better gifts are there?


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## lazyBum (Feb 27, 2012)

This and other consumerism holidays are the only times I'm glad to alone. I don't have to worry about finding the perfect gifts to prove my love to her. And I don't get in trouble because I didn't understand her cryptic hints and got her the last thing in the world that she would want.


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## vicker (Jul 11, 2003)

I only trust name brand circumcisers myself.


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## Laura (May 10, 2002)

lazyBum said:


> This and other consumerism holidays are the only times I'm glad to alone. I don't have to worry about finding the perfect gifts to prove my love to her. And I don't get in trouble because I didn't understand her cryptic hints and got her the last thing in the world that she would want.


 If you are providing love, safety, friends, hope, wisdom, health, knowledge, peace of mind, joy, discernment, clarity, healing and faith within a relationship, each of you would be thrilled with simple beach pebbles as gifts.


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## doodlemom (Apr 4, 2006)

Terri in WV said:


> Yes, I am struggling very much this year. This is the first year in the six that I have been widowed that it's been really hard. I think that it's because this will be the last year that I have a kid that still believes in the magic of Santa(sort of).
> 
> I didn't get my tree up until the 22nd, which is unusual for me and I haven't decorated otherwise. I haven't even done any baking or even making fudge, heck, I've barely planned on anything to eat, other then picking up a turkey and ham. The kids have done nothing but bicker since being off from school. The whole holiday seems off to me.
> 
> So, yes, it's been extremely hard this year.


Your kids will remember how hard you struggled for them and they will always love you for it. Love and family is what's important.


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

Laura said:


> Love, safety, friends, hope, wisdom, health, knowledge, peace of mind, joy, discernment, clarity, healing and faith.
> 
> What better gifts are there?


eyeballs!


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

can I let out a big boohoo? my dog is gone (she was with my youngest, and I could see her occasionally and she loves me so much and she was such good medicine), my oldest took her to be a watchdog in his *frat* house. It will be a terrible situation for her. I'm just absolutely sick about it. 

I gotta say, the love of my friends kept my chin up today. Thank you.


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## Laura (May 10, 2002)

I'm sorry about your dog, but your kids probably need her connection too.

Yes, EYEBALLS! The kid is enjoying hers, wouldn't let me wrap it, put it on right out of the box. Her friends love it, others are weirded out. She tells them WHY.

I have a long day today, a mix of business and more christmassy cheery stuff. Our last stop will be the store to box up Christmas crap, take it and throw it in trees along the roads. Kinda like toilet papering at Halloween.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

vicker said:


> I only trust name brand circumcisers myself.


Do I want to know what that really meant?


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

WYld, you can take a dog to a frat house, I didn't know they allowed pets? 

So sorry to hear that, animals have special bonds and become our life lines at times. 

Eyeballs, the reason is?


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## Raeven (Oct 11, 2011)

cindilu said:


> Do I want to know what that really meant?


I think he's just checking to see if anyone actually ever reads his posts.


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## Guest (Dec 26, 2012)

Some things you just don't want from Big Lots. Or the flea market.


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

the house is "private" my son leases it then has roommates. The dog is a heeler, she is kept shut up in the (foggy, kwim?)house, there is no fenced yard and it's on a busy main street--she has been a country dog, and while she got used to small town streets where people are driving slow and looking out for dogs, it's only a matter of time till she gets hit--there are a lot of people coming and going from the house who will NOT CARE about her. Also since she's a heeler she nips at people she doesnt' trust, which again, there will be a lot and she is going to be KICKED around at the least. 

She was in a good place with my younger son, and while there is the chance she can affect my older one(where she is now) for good he is NOT in a good place to even take basic care of her--stuff like food and water, which was hard enough to gte him to do when he was in a better place.

Sorry to be a downer.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Is there any way you can ask your youngest son, beg, what ever it takes to come back to your youngest son so he can keep him? That does not make me feel good in the slightest.


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

ok, talked to the younger son, got GREAT news about the older one, he's steering away from the iceberg and getting back on a good course! he is getting his own place without the loser houserats and my dog will be in a better place.

whew! thanks for holding my hair while I vomited! I was so looking forward to seeing my dog, and it was just really sad she was gone. Funny how some dogs light up a house...my neice and nephew are missing her a lot. SHe has a really sweet happy energy.

Glad you had a good day Cyn, still wish I coulda shared it with ya!!!!


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## SilverFlame819 (Aug 24, 2010)

cindilu said:


> While there is a HUGE part of me that just doesn't want to be with anyone there is also this tiny little part of me that does


*nods* Yep, that.

Mostly I miss present exchanges, and everyone baking and cooking together. But the drama is just ridiculous. Seriously, the cops were called this year and assault charges were filed. REALLY?! At a holiday gathering of family?? Thanks, but no thanks. I'll pass. I worked all evening. It was a good excuse to not be able to attend the "festivities"...


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

I think it would have been fun to dream with, plan with, cook and bake with, wrap and unwrap with. Just have someone else around to share with. 

Thank the good Lord that holiday is over, I am back on track to being my normal happy self but I have had to do a lot of internal soul searching and I am not sure I like what I found.


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## WhyNot (Jun 21, 2011)

cindilu said:


> I am back on track to being my normal happy self but I have had to do *a lot of internal soul searching and I am not sure I like what I found*.


 
Same boat. I was really struggling on the 24th...it seems dismissive that it was only for a few hours but those last hours of realization were very hard. Hit me hard. Agonising even. The 25th I picked back up, it was good. 26th wasn't so good but wasn't so bad. Part of yesterday was hard. This internal struggle thing isn't for sissies that is for sure.

Dead hard internal realizations...same as you..not liking what I found...also not wanting to accept it. Gradually accepting it. Working on keeping focus that 2013 will be radically different than 2012 and that I can make it so.

Hang in there Spud Bug ound:


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Whynot, I am so glad you and I are friends, Spud Bug, I love it, much better then Cindiu, lol. 

I went through the exact same thing at the same time, the 24th was the hardest day for me as well. Then X mas came and I was good again until I got to see my oldest son on Webcam and I lost it and bawled. I miss him so much and my kids are so important to me. So hard to have them grow up and move on with their own lives. 

Same here on the internal realizations, a lot of things about myself I am not real happy with and need to work on and change about me. This next year for me will be the real of self change and self help. Making choices for me and not trying to please everyone else. Starting to take care of me on the inside and out. Make sense?


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## wyld thang (Nov 16, 2005)

cindilu said:


> Whynot, I am so glad you and I are friends, Spud Bug, I love it, much better then Cindiu, lol.
> 
> I went through the exact same thing at the same time, the 24th was the hardest day for me as well. Then X mas came and I was good again until I got to see my oldest son on Webcam and I lost it and bawled. I miss him so much and my kids are so important to me. So hard to have them grow up and move on with their own lives.
> 
> Same here on the internal realizations, a lot of things about myself I am not real happy with and need to work on and change about me. This next year for me will be the real of self change and self help. Making choices for me and not trying to please everyone else. Starting to take care of me on the inside and out. Make sense?


Country Fair baby, prepare to meet your MAGIC! It's coming!!!!!!!


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## rickfrosty (Jun 19, 2008)

cindilu said:


> Is anyone else struggling with it being Christmas time and being single? I have had a hard time at the holidays for quite some time now. A couple of years ago we had family over for Christmas and it filled my house to over flowing. All of the Aunts, Uncles, Cousins came over and we made a huge dinner.
> 
> This year is the hardest. My oldest son is in Denver with his girlfriend and her family and my youngest son who lives with me likes our own quiet little world so we are not having a bunch of family here. It is just him and myself this year and it is not even really him. He works on Christmas day this year so it is really just me. I just watched a video a friend of mine put on his facebook this morning. He asked his girlfriend who was a manager at Coscto to marry him and he did it by putting together a video of them and had it broadcast all over the tv's in the store. When the video was over he came out, went on bent knee and asked her if she would marry him. I am not sure why but all of a sudden I am crying. While there is a HUGE part of me that just doesn't want to be with anyone there is also this tiny little part of me that does. And it seems that side is winning today.
> 
> Does any one else struggle like this besides me?


Nah, Xmas is sooo crazy commercialised ! I went and had an Xmas lunch w/my 84 yr. old Ma, and that was OK, but she is slipping down into senility (& blindness). She insists on staying alone in her old farmhouse where she has lived 60 years, but this keeps us worrying.
Xmas she had had a fire in her oven because she couldn't see that there was still a pkg. of cookies in there when she wanted to heat up the ham ?! Smoked the house a little.
Tomorrow will go get her & take her to my sister's for bigger gathering, then bring her back & come back over here for my evening cleaning job at the ski mtn.
I have met a pretty nice woman off of POF & drove to have lunch w/her Wed. - looking good, but people our age are easily discouraged, not jumping into anything.
She is willing to move, wants to do some of the things I want to do, but meanwhile she lives 3 hrs. away ?!
Best holiday wishes to y'all ! Let's hope 2013 isn't severely crazy and dangerous ??


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## rileyjo (Feb 14, 2005)

I worked as usual and it was good. One of the parents of the special needs people that I care for actually bought me some fleece. That blew me away. She knew I was into spinning because I have been showing her girl how to spin on a drop spindle.
One of my guys lives in the community and had his gf over for supper yesterday. She was also special needs and suddenly had a massive seizure and died in his arms. He is not on my client list so but they moved him into my group home for extra support. I carried in his breakfast this morning and spent some time just holding his hand.
He is so incredibly sad. I couldnt find the words to help him. I hope my silence helped.
It was a fine Christmas until this morning. Now I'm ready to start the new year.


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## cindilu (Jan 27, 2008)

Thank heavens for a New Year and a new start and a new day.


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