# Nervous



## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

I've not ever been a lucky person. Most of my life has been pretty horrid. I'm experiencing hope and happiness for the first time in so long that I can't rightly remember when the last time was. Nervous is too mild of a term. Terrified might come closer. I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop........ for disaster to strike. 

That titanium steel barrier around my heart is getting mighty thin. 

This is affecting the way I act. I'm not a socially graceful person anyhow, but I'm jumpy as a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs occupied by 5 yr olds. 

Just thought maybe y'all might understand.


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## Guest (Jun 2, 2014)

Consider it like winning the lottery. Sure, it would be a horrible disgrace to be one of those people in the "lists" later on down the road, who won a zillion bucks and blew it all. But, theres another, even more shameful list. The people who won, but were so afraid that they never enjoyed it. So, take the happiness while it's there, if stuff goes south, do your crying then. There ain't but one "now". Make it last.


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## Darren (May 10, 2002)

Your posts have told me a lot of things about you. All of it was very positive.  You already know to trust in yourself. You've proven you can get things done. You've learned you'll exceed others expectations or predjudices every time.

You are your own person. You'll do fine.


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Darren that may be the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me. My self confidence is just shattered at the moment. 

LOL.....an adversarial situation I can handle. Being vulnerable...not so much.


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## whiterock (Mar 26, 2003)

You'll be fine girl, the kids love you, he's crazy about you, and this old cowboy supports you in your search for happiness.
Ed


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Thanks Ed :kissy:


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## Terri (May 10, 2002)

TxMex I am not a lucky person either, but everybody gets lucky at least once or twice in their lives and I am no exception. Apparently neither are you!

Just remember: you are a responsible adult and you have paid your dues. Life will likely bite you again eventually, but you can handle it. The odds are every person catches at least one or two breaks in their lives, and apparently it is your turn.

Enjoy this! There is no predicting life but the highs make the lows easier to bear!


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## Ardie/WI (May 10, 2002)

Just enjoy life and what it brings you!


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## Laura (May 10, 2002)

Sit back, breathe it in and enjoy it. Don't be hanging your life on it.

The Wheel! The Wheel! teeheehee!


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## Fowler (Jul 8, 2008)

&#8220;To lose balance sometimes for love is part of living a balanced
life.&#8221; 
&#8213; Elizabeth Gilbert, _Eat, Pray, Love: _


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## Bret (Oct 3, 2003)

While you are waiting for the shoe to drop, dance. And when you get stepped on, keep on dancing.


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## Twp.Tom (Dec 29, 2010)

Easy for me to say,but just 'enjoy', these times*, You deserve to be happy. I'm rootin' for you!


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## nehimama (Jun 18, 2005)

I don't know what to advise, but I'm sorry it's hitting you this way. I hope you can see your way clear to relax and enjoy this part of your life, My Friend!


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## elkhound (May 30, 2006)

slow and easy...no need to rush....good things take time.


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

LOL; Tex, reading between the lines I gather that you've got a man lined up and are a bit afraid to go on.

Just take it one day at a time. If you are really afraid go to Instant Checkmate, pay a small fee and check him out in every state he's ever lived. Find out what he's been up to, criminal record if any, marriages, divorces--the whole schmeer.

None of us reach our thirties without some sort of attachment---how they end, how we behave, what we owe and to whom are all things that a prospective partner should know. Most of us are willing to sit down and tell a prospective mate all these things, but some hide important facts.

One word of advice; you may disclose previous relationships, but do not go into detail. 

Ox


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## Cornhusker (Mar 20, 2003)

When you get up in the morning, tell yourself either "Today is going to be wonderful" or "today is going to be horrible"
Either way, you'll probably be right.


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## L.A. (Nov 15, 2007)

That kind of nervous,,uh,,makes you feel young,,and all gooey inside,,:thumb:

How does that song go???,,,

"&#9835; &#9834;&#9835; I feel pretty,,oh so pretty,,,I feel pretty & witty & wise &#9835; &#9835; &#9834; &#9835;" 

Sing this with a smile,,,and you'll be fine...

:sing:


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## doingitmyself (Jul 30, 2013)

Txmex, the best way to know if you can trust someone is to trust them,a little at first, a little more later, a little extra more,. Sooner or later it becomes evident if you can trust completely then comes the heart, the most important treasure of all. When it all comes together it makes all the rest of the craap worthwhile. 

Your nervousness is as it should be, but don't think yourself into a corner, just let it roll, don't force it, don't push it, don't mold it.... just let it unfold naturally and in its own good time. 

You have known this guy long enough to know he's a stand up guy. If your up to the challenges he brings with, then you go girl! Deep down you already know where this is heading. Don't be in a hurry to get there, relax, drink in all the ambrosia while its the sweetest! You deserve a good guy, the question is.... are your ready for a good guy, I think the answer is YES!!!!! ENJOY YOURSELF Amanda.:rock:


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Oxankle said:


> LOL; Tex, reading between the lines I gather that you've got a man lined up and are a bit afraid to go on.
> 
> Just take it one day at a time. If you are really afraid go to Instant Checkmate, pay a small fee and check him out in every state he's ever lived. Find out what he's been up to, criminal record if any, marriages, divorces--the whole schmeer.
> 
> ...


This is not a problem. I've known him for 15 yrs or so. Both of us know the good, the bad and the ugly


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Thanks y'all! I really appreciate all the support and it is what I really needed today. 

I think that part of it is that I have been guarding my heart so as not to get hurt again. When my heart starts to get involved I get scared. I'm trying not to sabotage myself. 

I'm also finding that I'm having trouble expressing my feelings. I'm worse than a tongue tied teenager on her first date. I either can't say anything or I babble.

:hysterical: Have patience and take it slow....y'all don't know me very well ound:


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

LOL, Tex; in that case we send our best and wish you well. A bit of tingle in your life will be good for the complexion.--enjoy. 
Ox


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## farmgal (Nov 12, 2005)

This sounds like wonderful news. Even if it brings apprehension. My advise is don't have expectations too grandiose. One day at a time and just enjoy and just "be".


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

So now he needs space and I'm pushing too hard. Probably that danged gung ho goal orientation of mine :smack 

I do not remember it being this hard when I was young! 

Think I'll do something theapeutic this weekend like trimming tree branches with a shot gun or boxing or knocking over bee hives. :hair


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## doingitmyself (Jul 30, 2013)

Tx, get on the phone, and make yourself an appt. at the local spa. You need to decompress. Then when you've relaxed and unwound, stop by your local sporting store and brick up a brick of ammo. Head down to your onsite hog shooting gallery and "let er budge" ... !!

Facials, pedis, massage, all ensure your trigger finger is steady and not quivering! Everyone knows that occasionally shooting stuff just plain does a girl good!!! LOLOLOL 

Got bullets?


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

doingitmyself said:


> Tx, get on the phone, and make yourself an appt. at the local spa. You need to decompress. Then when you've relaxed and unwound, stop by your local sporting store and brick up a brick of ammo. Head down to your onsite hog shooting gallery and "let er budge" ... !!
> 
> Facials, pedis, massage, all ensure your trigger finger is steady and not quivering! Everyone knows that occasionally shooting stuff just plain does a girl good!!! LOLOLOL
> 
> Got bullets?


What a great idea! 

Have I got bullets?! :hysterical: Oh my. Thank you. I needed a good laugh!


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Ignore him for a while--he's scared too.


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## Ardie/WI (May 10, 2002)

Just go with the flow. 

Relax and don't make this relationship a big deal! I'ts just a relationship. If it doesn't work...oh well! My friends mother told us that if you don't catch the current love-interest that men are like buses. Another one will come along in no time.


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## Bret (Oct 3, 2003)

Ardie/WI said:


> Just go with the flow.
> 
> Relax and don't make this relationship a big deal! I'ts just a relationship. If it doesn't work...oh well! My friends mother told us that if you don't catch the current love-interest that men are like buses. Another one will come along in no time.


This explains why dogs are always peeing on my boots. Thanks Ardie.


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## Guest (Jun 7, 2014)

Ah, my friend...it doesn't have to be an all or nothing at all relationship...
do try to "simply" enjoy..erase all of those what if's and maybe's and laugh, laugh, laugh until your sides hurt...


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

I think Ox hit the nail on the head. 

Apparently he decided space wasn't all it was cracked up to be


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## fordy (Sep 13, 2003)

................Put all assets and such into a Trust , and you won't have to give anything up to 'Community' property ! , fordy


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Slow and easy now, Tex. Don't get over-anxious. 
Ox


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## Ardie/WI (May 10, 2002)

Oxankle said:


> Slow and easy now, Tex. Don't get over-anxious.
> Ox


I don't see anything to be anxious about. Either he is interested or he isn't. And if he isn't...so what!? She got along without his approval all these years and I bet she can do it again!


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

ARDIE!!!! We are in the middle of a hunt here---Never tell a girl to disarm when the game is coming to the bait. 

Take it nice and easy, Tex.


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## Ardie/WI (May 10, 2002)

Oxankle said:


> ARDIE!!!! We are in the middle of a hunt here---Never tell a girl to disarm when the game is coming to the bait.
> 
> Take it nice and easy, Tex.


Boy, Ox, I'm not certain if you would have liked me when I was young and free spirited...and naughty!


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Y'all are a riot!

There are some....well, complications isn't exactly right, but it's close...that make this a really odd situation. I'm doing my best to give him some space and be a bit more distant and brightly friendly. LOL....made him kind of nervous which is probably a good thing  

I'm so confused at this point that I have stopped trying to figure out where I stand and I'm just going to let him make the next move. Who'd have thought this would have ended up this complicated when I have known him for this long?! 

Fordy I appreciate the precaution. I've had several forum members contact me via p.m. about this very subject. Thanks to the ex I am very well versed on divorce and community property laws in the state of Texas. 

Anything you have going into a marriage remains your separate property. Anything you inherit while in a marriage is your separate property unless you sell it at which point the proceeds are fair game. So my hard assets are safe. I do need to do a bit of research to see about how some income streams might be treated, but even if someone could claim half of my income during a union they couldn't attach the assets that are creating that income. Hmmm, for just this reason, I may want to take some of my liquid assets and invest them in growth funds if it ever does look like I'm going to tie the knot.


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## Terri (May 10, 2002)

TxMex, for what is worth, when there were deaths in my family I also had little appetite for closeness. 

If that is what he is doing. 

For a while the world had no brightness, and while I liked being with the man I 
was dating (and who I eventually married) I was not seeking out joy for a while, and I had little warmth to give, as I needed to lick my wounds for a bit.

I know that that scared him for a while, as he was afraid I was losing interest in him, but for a while I had no reassurance to give. I needed time. 

I do not know why your sweetie is pulling back as I have never met the man, of course!


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

I think I know why. The funny thing is that he knew this before he started the relationship. I haven't changed. What I want hasn't changed. I have been really open about it. So when I have behaved as he knew I would it has scared the heck out of him. 

The thing is....over the last several years when he would describe what he wanted in a woman to me, I've always thought....you dimwit, you are describing me. If we were to both sit down and write out a list of what we wanted in a mate we could just about go down the list and check everything off with each other. As funny as it seems I think this scares him.

I've watched him date for several years now. I think the reason he is scared is that he knows I'm not a woman he can take lightly. I'm not after his paycheck or anything else material. In fact, I'm probably the first woman he's ever dated that has no interest in being taken to fancy dinners and doesn't really want gifts. I want his time and I want his heart. Money is easy to give. What I want are the difficult things and I won't accept anything less.


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Ardie; When I was young I met a number of free-spirited and naughty women. I liked them very well, but none of them liked me well enough to stay with a man who had no visible source of income. 

By the time I'd found a way to make a living most of them had come to their senses and were longer free-spirited and naughty, so I came up with one who was down-to earth, honest, hard-working, kind, loving and gentle. Bless her heart, she was probably a lot better than I deserved. 

And when I lost her I found out there were more of her kind out there. She told me there would be.


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## whiterock (Mar 26, 2003)

TxMex, ya can always talk to me to pass the time while waitin for him to come to his senses.


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

We're on your side, Babe. What you are seeking is what we all desire. Sometimes men are afraid of commitment, sometimes they don't know how to express themselves, sometimes they want the benefits without commitment and sometimes they're just not sure what it is they want. Hang in there.


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Thanks Whiterock. If I'm ever at home for a few minutes I'll give you a call.

He is driving me absolutely up a wall! Probably means he is THE ONE....lol. I told a friend yesterday that I'm beginning to feel like I'm bi-polar. I sure do wish things would get on a more even keel. The emotional ups and downs are playing havoc with my diet not to mention my nerves.


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## Guest (Jun 10, 2014)

TxMex said:


> Thanks Whiterock. If I'm ever at home for a few minutes I'll give you a call.
> 
> He is driving me absolutely up a wall! Probably means he is THE ONE....lol. I told a friend yesterday that I'm beginning to feel like I'm bi-polar. I sure do wish things would get on a more even keel. The emotional ups and downs are playing havoc with my diet not to mention my nerves.


Why not take a little vacation..? Take off for the countryside of Ireland for two weeks..check out the farms, the sheep, the bless'ed rain...LOL..Absence makes the heart grow fonder...and Ireland's a country-gal friendly place


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## Laura (May 10, 2002)

Honey, remember what's fueling those emotions is mostly adrenalin and that stuff can make you sick. Don't overdose on it. SPACE! SPACE! SPACE! GO DO SOMETHING ELSE!


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

I'd love to see Ireland, but I'd have to fly.....and they won't let me drive the plane 

I was actually thinking that would be a good idea just this morning. Think I'll go visit some friends on the other side of Texas. Maybe go down into Mexico for a week as well. Purple hull peas, cream peas and tomatoes ought to be producing by the time I get back. Road trip!


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## Fowler (Jul 8, 2008)

Dont blame yourself txmex, it seems sometimes men get scared of what they really want. And run to what the know, what they are use too, a crazy woman to be crazy. Some get scared of what they want. Because crazy is predictable. What they want is unknown territory.


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## Darren (May 10, 2002)

whiterock said:


> TxMex, ya can always talk to me to pass the time while waitin for him to come to his senses.


Geez. Don't tell me there's a line already.


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

ROFL Darren! There ought to be a line formed outside my gate! I'm beginning to doubt the intelligence of Texas men  :hysterical:


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## whiterock (Mar 26, 2003)

TxMex said:


> ROFL Darren! There ought to be a line formed outside my gate! I'm beginning to doubt the intelligence of Texas men  :hysterical:


 
I beg your pardon, ma'am. :lonergr::lonergr::cowboy::cowboy::cowboy:


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## Guest (Jun 11, 2014)

TxMex said:


> ROFL Darren! There ought to be a line formed outside my gate! I'm beginning to doubt the intelligence of Texas men  :hysterical:


uh oh....:runforhills:


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## Darren (May 10, 2002)

TxMex said:


> ROFL Darren! There ought to be a line formed outside my gate! I'm beginning to doubt the intelligence of Texas men  :hysterical:


I could lose my man card for telling you this. Keep it to yourself. OK? It's not just Texas men.


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

I do beg your pardon. I should have said SOME Texas men


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## doingitmyself (Jul 30, 2013)

Darren said:


> I could lose my man card for telling you this. Keep it to yourself. OK? It's not just Texas men.


It was brought to my attention that there certainly is a difference in how lots of Texas men view women that's for sure. I have been told by she Texans that lots of Texas men think women are for arm candy mostly. Funny thing, holding candy on your arm would make your inner elbow sticky here in Illinois. Don't know why one would do that.

Different strokes for different folks as they say.


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Nothing wrong with arm candy. First you catch them with candy and flowers and soft words. Then, back at the house a good man can entertain himself for half a day unwrapping that arm candy and another half-day watching her putting herself back together and fixing dinner.

Some fellow just don't have any idea how to go about domestic affairs.


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## willow_girl (Dec 7, 2002)

> Nothing wrong with arm candy. First you catch them with candy and flowers and soft words. Then, back at the house a good man can entertain himself for half a day unwrapping that arm candy and another half-day watching her putting herself back together while he's fixing dinner.


There. I corrected that for you, Ox! ound:


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Barb says I stand corrected.
Ox


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## Terri (May 10, 2002)

Oxankle said:


> Barb says I stand corrected.
> Ox


Yeah, it is considered FRIENDLY to join one's sweetie in the kitchen, chopping vegetables, stirring what needs stirring, and possibly sharing a bit of wine. :buds:

Friendly is good, friendly is best.:sing: I cannot be the only female in the world to think this!


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## doingitmyself (Jul 30, 2013)

^^ that is the epitome of the relationship^^

as is

friends in the kitchen 
lovers in the boudoir
coworkers in the garden

and 

partners in life

:hysterical::buds::banana::hobbyhors:rotfl:


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Well now, that lovers part could stand some extension.


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

Chuck, IF I hadn't read the beginning posters problem, and had just come in on this page, About 3 or 4 posts up, Ida thought you were teaching how to FISH?? lol

IF ones fishing with no lure, and no bait, then they likely will catch nothing.
Lure is the look, the talk. Bait is whats inside that leaks out while fishing. lol Good luck. Heres hoping you will need a license when your done LOL.


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

He means you, Tex. He's wishing you well. 

You had me confused for a moment there, Bill.
Chuck


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Thanks for the clarification Oxankle. I'm pretty used to Bill by now 

Most country gals are pretty good at fishing


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