# Single homesteaders?



## DKWunlimited (Sep 11, 2006)

I know we have many of them around this forum and some are names that I've never seen over in singletree. To those who are single, why aren't you coming to the single forum? Are you just not interested in meeting anyone else? Do you already have someone? Or is there something about that forum that's keeping you away? We don't bite, we just like to visit and discuss how we work on projects alone or how our love lives are going or not.

Come visit!


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## suburbanite (Jul 27, 2006)

Seems like its mostly girls there, except for Shrek.


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## marvella (Oct 12, 2003)

i can't really say? maybe tired of some of the games some people play? never really sure if who you are talking to is a real person, or somene who gets a kick out of multiple personalities that argue with themselves? in my case, a general lack of interest in being on the internet much?

kind of same-o. same-o.... ya know? :shrug: 

it's a busy time of year....


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## Janis Sauncy (Apr 11, 2006)

I'm a single parent "homesteader" and once in awhile I will go in there to see what's going on. Mostly, though, it's the same people talking about the same issues. The "community" seems to be pretty well established.

Besides that, I'm more focused on the day to day topics of life on the homestead. Getting the garden in, keeping the goats inside their fencing, splitting and stacking firewood, suggestions on making my hard earned dollar stretch as far as possible, etc., etc., etc.

I guess at this stage of my life, the boy/girl thing doesn't rate very high on my priority list.

Janis


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## tn_junk (Nov 28, 2006)

Been married twice. Which was twice too often, for my ex-wives sake. Best that I just remain alone. Got way too much respect for women folks to get another one involved in this mess called my life.

galump


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## Madame (Jan 1, 2003)

I checked it out a few years - seemed mostly to be about dating. At 54, I don't expect to find anyone, and don't particularly care. Wasn't a good fit for me.


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## NWoods_Hippie (Nov 16, 2006)

Up till about 3 weeks ago I was there all the time, but there is just to much drama now and I don't really have time for that.

I post to ST once in a while and that is about it.

Margie


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## Kazahleenah (Nov 3, 2004)

suburbanite said:


> Seems like its mostly girls there, except for Shrek.



naw... there's lots of guys there...


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## clsmith15 (Sep 24, 2006)

I've checked it out a couple of times and there a seemed to be more chit-chat and drama than day-to-day homesteading talk. I do go to another forum that has a lot of chit-chat but we've known each other for years and when you're new it's hard to break into an already established group.


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## Jan Doling (May 21, 2004)

I'm not looking for a date or a mate....my time is all used up raising my kids.


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## DenverGirlie (Dec 22, 2005)

Several reasons for me:

I am not married but in a relationship, so I'm not looking for a date or anything like that.

I don't see how being single needs it's own group, how does being single relate to homesteading? Other than not having another set of hands. Do we need a married group now??? 

I've poked in there from time to time, seems like a lot of bickering, gossip, name calling, arguements, etc. etc. I don't see why that isn't taken care of already in General chat, why would I need to visit another place like that when GC already covers all of that

What is the purpose of singletree? Cooking is for cooking, goats is for goats, countryside families is for families (really it's about relationships thou, not necessarily families IMHO), garden is for gardening. Singletree is for?????


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## suburbanite (Jul 27, 2006)

Most of the (few) men there are in the midwest or southeast; I'm on the west coast. Many of the men there are...not well-disposed toward feminist thinking (to phrase things diplomatically). Some are hyper-religious. And there's a couple of nutballs.

I just don't see men in that forum that interest me.


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## Melissa (Apr 15, 2002)

The single-tree forum was originally started as a stand alone forum and moved here when Homesteading Today began.


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## Shrek (May 1, 2002)

Singletree began in 2002 as I was transforming my homeplace into Singletree Knoll after my divorce. I established the board to be a social area for singles to have a comfortable place to address single and resingled issues or discuss whatever with a group with some commonality. 

While the commonality of being single is available on Singletree, we dont exclude people from our discussions for not being single, just ask that they not present themselves as single if they arn't.

Over the years some have connected, some have learned to pull their "two horse wagon" with a "singletree trace" , some just chose to stay in the shade there for awhile ,a few chose to go off grid / offine and sadly , some passed away , but found some comfort before their time ended.

Some of the participants of Singletree also participate here on families as they are heads of single parent families or transitioned here after moving on from singletree to doubletree status. 

While it appears that there are no males there,its just that the females tend to be more active in posting recently. New participants of both sexes are always passing through the board group.


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## HilltopDaisy (Feb 26, 2003)

DenverGirlie said:


> Several reasons for me:
> 
> I am not married but in a relationship, so I'm not looking for a date or anything like that.
> 
> ...


Wow, I feel the need to address this. Singletree is perfect for me, and many others like me. I feel a real connection and kinship with the folks who hang out there. I've been part of this place since the day it was born, and made many friends with the other regulars over the years. They know me and I know them. I'm comfortable there. I know that CF is a nice place but because I chose to not have kids I feel like I don't belong here. You yourself say "Countryside Families is for families". What if you don't have a family? Does that make this lifestyle any less "my lifestyle"? Many of us enjoy being single and we share the good parts, as well as the bad. 

I've lived alone the entire time I've had my homestead, so everything that's been accomplished here was done by me, with no help from anyone else; no other set of hands. It's been very tough sometimes but I never wanted it any less just because I didn't have a man to help. I've pounded hundreds of posts and strung thousands of feet of fence; I have bees, a herd of registered dairy goats, I shear my own sheep, raise heritage turkeys and chickens, have a CSA and work nights in direct patient care in a hospital. My buddies at Singletree cheer me on, they give me very good advice, and I feel cared for by them. They are oftentimes my support network. We cry together, and laugh together, and argue, too. Just like on this board. 

I will agree that there have been times that things got nasty, and we truly struggled to bring back some focus. We've had serious troll issues, and hopefully that's been handled and we can get back to the fellowship many of us enjoy. Hope that helps answer your question.


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## zealot (Feb 6, 2006)

I complained about the risque' humor on that forum one time, so the moderator simply blocked it from my control panel, so now I can't even read it while logged in.


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## moonwolf (Sep 20, 2004)

HilltopDaisy said:


> I know that CF is a nice place but because I chose to not have kids I feel like I don't belong here. You yourself say "Countryside Families is for families".


Just because one has no children, does not mean they don't have family. 
Why shouldn't you feel you don't belong here, as any other forum where one wish to post? 'Family' people post also on Singletree forum. Most, I would offer to say that post on ST are single parents WITH kids. Why would you feel any less 'belonging' on CF as on ST if the only reason is feeling that because you don't have kids? :shrug: 
Both forums have their purpose and moderation responses to what they offer IMHO.


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## Kshobbit (May 14, 2002)

I like the singletree forum. It is just that I am older than most of them on it. At almost 63, the odds of finding a compatible male homesteader is slim to none. Plus I am an independent, slightly opinionated goat farmer and there is no-one for me. I still go there and read the posts and occasionally post too.
It is a little different to homestead alone. I am lucky to have my adult sons to come over and help with the hard to do things like trim hooves, or deworm, disbudd, immunize or catch kids to sell. I wish there was a goat raising man with a sense of humor who wants an old lady to love but reality says it ain't going to happen. :nono:


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## Faustus (Jan 11, 2007)

I'm definitely single, but haven't wandered over to the singles forum because while I'd love to start homesteading, I'm not homesteading yet, I'm in the UK right now, which I don't think applies to many people and, being of the Jewish persuasion, the question of dating can get complicated. Still, I'll try and check it out sometime- never know where you'll meet someone, after all!


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## lmnde (Sep 25, 2006)

I had the distinct feeling that it was mainly a well established single dating/chitchat group, rather than a discussion group for single homesteaders [if that distinction makes sense]. Furthermore there seems to be a lot of bickering and mini wars going on, and little meaningful conversation the few times I checked in [might be wrong in this of course, as I don't check there very often]. 

If there is some genuine talking about how to deal with homesteading issues "single" handledly, I'd be more than happy to visit more often. 

As far as dating/looking - I am really not at this time - I have my hands full as it is with what is going on in my life, and making time for dating or courting is simply not a priority right now. Lmnde


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## Simplicity (Dec 31, 2005)

I'm sorry to have to say this but if I remember right, it was you who commented "oh Paleeze" to a question that I asked at a time when I was feeling down about myself. That hurt. The following advice that I recieved,, from the community was great but Ifound that I didn't quite fit in. Not because I felt I had to be single, I just agree with Janis who wrote that it's "a "community" that seems to be pretty well established."I don't get on much these daysbut when I do, I just stay in the Countryside Families, garden and food board

Crystal.


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## pcwerk (Sep 2, 2003)

"Mostly, though, it's the same people talking about the same issues. The "community" seems to be pretty well established."

There is always room for more (and thats what keeps it from stagnating
and becoming "the same people talking about the same issues"  Just
as in any community and any conversation, you have to insert [assert]yourself into the mix. 
james


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## Ohiogal (Mar 15, 2007)

I bounce in a few times a month...the posts are for the most part from the same group of people. I don't really have much to say and right now, I'm too busy to want to read drama.
Its a good group of people though, from what I saw.


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## KristineinKS (Apr 22, 2006)

I would agree with what others have said about it already being a well-established community. True, it might be possible to get into the mix, as James said, but too often it feels like an intrusion (to me, anyway). Much like moving to a small town, it doesn't necessarily feel overly welcoming to newcomers, though I'm certain there are probably some exceptions to that.


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## NWoods_Hippie (Nov 16, 2006)

I am going to back-track a bit on my original post, while I haven't been frequenting the ST board of late, I do have to say that when I joined HT in October of 06 I jumped right into the ST board with both feet and was made to feel very welcome. I have made many very good friends there.

I feel it is a good fit for me, while I enjoy some of the post on CF I am childfree by choice and don't always feel I "fit" there very well.

Give ST a try, I think what is needed there is a heavy dose of new folks to get things back to where they used to be!

Peace,
Margie


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## Shambalah (Jun 19, 2005)

Actually Debbie, you do bite and so do some others.

But hey, you don't have to single. You also don't have to be welcomed. 
I'm not looking and I'm not welcomed but if I can post with all of these bite marks and still survive, then anyone can! 
Just bring your first aid kit, you know..just incase.


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## manygoatsnmore (Feb 12, 2005)

I just don't have enough time to get to all the forums I think might be interesting. I have slow dial-up and that limits me quite a bit. I'm not currently looking for a new mate - and don't plan to be any time soon, if ever. Too set in my ways to get "yoked up" again, I guess, lol.


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## radiofish (Mar 30, 2007)

I have been lurking around this site for quite a while now, and I post on other homesteading sites. I have been thru the singletree threads and have discussed things such as fisheries in there (I was a Fisheries Biologist). I am single but not really looking at this moment being busy getting this place into shape since acquiring it in Aug 2006. Like suburbanite said - not many on the West Coast/ let alone way up north on the Coast above the Ocean. Plus I am pretty sure that I can hold my own in there, if I was able to survive the Marine Corps.. :hobbyhors


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## Shrek (May 1, 2002)

lmnde said:


> I had the distinct feeling that it was mainly a well established single dating/chitchat group, rather than a discussion group for single homesteaders [if that distinction makes sense]. Furthermore there seems to be a lot of bickering and mini wars going on, and little meaningful conversation the few times I checked in [might be wrong in this of course, as I don't check there very often].
> 
> If there is some genuine talking about how to deal with homesteading issues "single" handledly, I'd be more than happy to visit more often.
> 
> As far as dating/looking - I am really not at this time - I have my hands full as it is with what is going on in my life, and making time for dating or courting is simply not a priority right now. Lmnde


All you have to do is post a thread about any homesteading issue you have and many of us will tell you how we do it the singletree harness way.

Unless folks ask , we don't know what they want to discuss.


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## Milkwitch (Nov 11, 2006)

I have popped in at ST a time or two, but I too felt it an established community, and could not follow the exchanges...
I have been married twice and have two children, I feel I have done my duty to my species. I no longer have hormones so all the drama does'nt seem so interesting....
I have been single for 20 years, and I find I have become ill at ease with people. If I ever had a sense of social filters and boundaries I have long since lost them, so I tend to get into trouble quickly. I say what I am thinking and often feel shocked and fragile when it is taken the wrong way........
With enough work to keep me swamped for the next 50 years, any time I get to sit on the computer and think of myself, I can't be bothered if things don't work out the first time.


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