# Prepping for older single woman



## Piney Woods (Jul 5, 2006)

Growing up in the Midwest with all the ice and snow storms, tornadoes and weather anomalies along with layoffs, divorces, etc. I have always been a "prepper". The last layoff and time off between jobs, stocked up food and savings was a lifesaver.

As I have gotten older, my thoughts have gotten more realistic as to what would happen to me in a SHTF situation. I'm getting to the point that I am no longer able to do heavy labor any more - as far as building, dealing with large livestock, running a homestead. I have a small city lot, but am looking around for a small acreage that I could at least have a cabin and have raised beds (arthritis), some chickens, some peace and quiet and privacy. I have some dear friends that have several city lots and plant a huge garden every year, can, hunt, etc. But they have children and grandchildren - not sure there would be room and/or purpose for me. 

Security is an issue I'm concerned with as well. An older lady like myself, alone, seems an easy target if a group of thugs decided to take what I have.

Would like to hear suggestions on what someone in my situation might do if SHTF. Join a like-minded group of people? Bug out on my own? Is there room in a prepper group for an old lady that can't do the hard work? I can sew, I'm learning to can, I can watch kids.... But so can a lot of other people. 

Your thoughts appreciated.


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## Vickie44 (Jul 27, 2010)

I would think it makes sense to prep to be on your own but work on your knowledge base so you have something to contribute if you need to relocate .Marksmanship and native foods perhaps .

I remember once considering communal farm living until I read how everyone wanted to watch the children and play the piano but no one was interested in unloading hay or mucking out barns .lol

You need to provide something that others can not


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## Cyngbaeld (May 20, 2004)

Maybe talk to your friends first. If you have a long term friendship then you know you will get along with them. Otherwise maybe you can find other older single women to team up with. Perhaps find a larger property and divide it so each has a few acres and you are living next door to one another.


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## Piney Woods (Jul 5, 2006)

Maybe a "Golden Girls homestead" Cyngbaeld? :clap:


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## katheh (Jul 21, 2012)

People who live through true emergencies do so with the help of a group of people. Very few could go it alone and live.

I would look to build relationships with like-minded people. You can probably find some at church, if you are church-y.

Good luck!


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## Solarman (Sep 26, 2011)

Piney Woods said:


> Growing up in the Midwest with all the ice and snow storms, tornadoes and weather anomalies along with layoffs, divorces, etc. I have always been a "prepper". The last layoff and time off between jobs, stocked up food and savings was a lifesaver.
> 
> As I have gotten older, my thoughts have gotten more realistic as to what would happen to me in a SHTF situation. I'm getting to the point that I am no longer able to do heavy labor any more - as far as building, dealing with large livestock, running a homestead. I have a small city lot, but am looking around for a small acreage that I could at least have a cabin and have raised beds (arthritis), some chickens, some peace and quiet and privacy. I have some dear friends that have several city lots and plant a huge garden every year, can, hunt, etc. But they have children and grandchildren - not sure there would be room and/or purpose for me.
> 
> ...


I understand your concern. 

Find ways to make it appear that you have a hubby. Two cars, leave tools laying around, men's gloves, men's clothes hanging on the line, beer cans (LOL!) Just think about it!

Hope this helps!


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## Cyngbaeld (May 20, 2004)

Piney Woods said:


> Maybe a "Golden Girls homestead" Cyngbaeld? :clap:


Yes, I wouldn't mind doing something like that, but I want my own house, etc.


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## unregistered29228 (Jan 9, 2008)

You might consider taking a gun class (the NRA often has classes just for women) and getting a weapon. It would give you some security and peace of mind. 

http://women.nra.org/

Chickens are rabbits are easy to keep even in a suburban setting, and that and some container gardening would feed you. Food for one person is a lot easier to grow than for a big family, in the same location.

I agree with the others - talk to your friends about your concerns. I know I'd love to have a Grandma type person to help with childcare or nursing or cooking if things got bad. You might be surprised how valuable you are to them!


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## GrammaBarb (Dec 27, 2012)

Hi Folks,

I'm relating to this, as for the past year I have been alone except for two dogs and a cat. Well, *living* alone; I have a brother, a son and two granddaughters within 30 miles, but if the S did indeed HTF and gasoline and electricity went away, 30 miles is a LONG distance! 

I try to plan around the needs of my family, and the defense posture of my neighbors. Happily, most of the people up here on the hill are into personal arms, and there are only three ways into the neighborhood (and one of those could be eliminated by taking out a small bridge.). We have spring water, gravity fed, so that's not a problem, and there are cows across the road and horses next door. (Translation: first winter's food, and possible transportation.)

What can *I* contribute? Short run, canning food, fishing, teaching and operating hand-set letterpresses for a community newsletter, caring for children and teaching them. Cooking, always, of course everyone does that, but not everyone has a wood cook stove.

Longer run? I can turn corn into alcohol fuel, either for farm vehicles or their operators enjoyment. Using a cap-lock or flintlock doesn't frighten me, and I can build a cook-fire with flint and steel. And I have books. Hundreds of books, which would be invaluable if the SHTF big-time. We *are* our history, and it would have to be preserved, and in a post-electronic society, that means books. 

Am I worried? Sure. I worry about my grandkids. I worry about how terribly vulnerable we are in the cities.....imagine those people with no supermarkets, no water to drink or to flush, no heat in winter and no handy A/C in summer, so they would have to leave the cities, and out where I am is where they will go. What to do? Well, feed the friendlies and fight the bad guys. Scary at best! 

As for being female and single, it just is what it is. I have a group of friends who know that as long as I have room for one more sleeping bag, they have a place to go that has water and is on high ground. And I remind myself that it could be worse---I could be 30 with a new-born again. Now THAT is really frightening!

If the worst should ever happen, we will recognize our allies, and they us. And as always, friends will gather, pitch in, and survive. I truly believe that.

With apologies for the lengthy post---my Irish heritage, I'm afraid. 

Barb


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## Belfrybat (Feb 21, 2003)

I live on 3 city lots (3/4th acre) in a small town. I'm allowed small livestock, but don't have any. I do have a decent garden when the drought is not too terrible. I've made friends with the neighbours and I think we'd look out for each other. I moved from 28 acres a few miles out of town 3 years ago because I felt vulnerable out there, plus it was increasingly difficult for me to maintain that much property. I have about 9-12 months food put by and a fair amount of tools. I think I'd be as OK as anyone should the worse happen. EXCEPT for the fact my house is all electric. But I do have backup cooking (butane stove) and a fireplace. 
I think there is only so much prepping we can do as we age. Joining others can be an option, but from my experience, when I lived in community, very few are really willing to pull their own weight and it falls on a few to support the many. Not a good situation, especially if the group is aging as folks then become caretakers of the less healthy.


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## soulsurvivor (Jul 4, 2004)

Start with where you find yourself standing this very moment. Assume that's where you're standing when the stuff hits and now decide what supports you want around you in that scenario and set about making it happen now. 

Staying in good health should be your number one goal. Learning how to defend yourself is also a top concern. Self defense is more than weapons related. It's staying aware of your surroundings and being able to think fast to protect yourself. I'm guessing you're pretty good at this already since you're older and have taken care of yourself this long. Sorry to say, but there's no guarantee that joining a group is going to provide you with any help other than safety in numbers. I'm not trying to be a smart mouth, but I don't figure even my family would be delighted to have me to take care of during a disaster. 

Focus on water, food, shelter. Focus on putting those supplies/preps in stashes around your location and then within walking distance of your current location. Do you have friends that are mechanical and can show you how to hot wire a vehicle? Do you know how to change a tire, siphon gas, charge a battery? Get yourself into a McGyver mode and have fun with learning new things.


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## dkhern (Nov 30, 2012)

with heart issues i can relate. knowledge is the key lots have read how to do but have never done it. ole way are going to be the key(think depression and grand parents) i evolving from frozed to canned foods. 55 gal of diesel will hive me 10yr of tractor use in garden. butane tank will give me years of canning fuel. plan on getting wood heater for cooking and heat. use my saw and wood and share on halfs. again knowledge and skills


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## Cyngbaeld (May 20, 2004)

Belfrybat said:


> Joining others can be an option, but from my experience, when I lived in community, very few are really willing to pull their own weight and it falls on a few to support the many. Not a good situation, especially if the group is aging as folks then become caretakers of the less healthy.


Yes, I wasn't thinking of a commune type situation, but more like a group purchasing land as a block then dividing it so each owned their own property. Just insuring that you at least start out with like minded neighbors would be nice. Nobody really responsible for anybody else's care or feeding unless you had agreed to such already and perhaps were being paid for it.


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## Gilj (Apr 24, 2008)

Older, that is relative. Are you reasonable healthy and mobile. If not work on that, immediately. Make yourself a valuable commodity. I do live in a somewhat rural area, so my AO is a little different than yours. I can have a garden and livestock. But like you I am no spring chicken. Yet I know any team I'm on is better with me than without me. 

But here are a few of my thougts for you. Take an advanced first aid course or even an EMT course. Imagine the need for emergency care for a SHTF situation. Learn how to reload or even cast your own bullets from lead. While others are securing the area, you could contribute be making the bullets that would be difficult to find during a SHTF situation. Learn how to use tools, drill, chainsaws, nails. Learn how to train dogs. Learn how to kill and smoke a hog or other animals. I guess what I am trying to say, as don't see yourself as the old grandma, who is only good for watching the crying babies. Think outside of the traditional "ole lady role." Make yourself a viable commodity. Knowledge and skills that you can still learn and acquire now will make you one of the first ones picked to stay on a team.


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## pamda (Oct 14, 2004)

Piney Woods said:


> Maybe a "Golden Girls homestead" Cyngbaeld? :clap:


 Can I be Sofia??lol..I love that old woman


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## Cyngbaeld (May 20, 2004)

I agree, age is relative. I'm only 60 and know at some point I'll have to stop doing my own fencing and mucking out, but that time hasn't come yet. Biggest trouble I've had is that I can't drive any more because of double vision. I don't compensate like I did when younger and the eye muscles are not as strong.


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## Guest (Jan 25, 2013)

The whole "older" thing is mystifying to me. I hear it a lot. Exactly how old is older? And why bother slowing down? If I was getting old, I think I'd rather go full blast til I just fall over from it, even if "full blast" turns out to be less then than it is now.
ETA: I'm not a woman, but surely there's no way that women get older and men don't, is there?


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## Piney Woods (Jul 5, 2006)

I guess "old" isn't really the issue - I'm only 58 but am dealing with disabilities I never expected. Do we ever expect to be disabled? I have some medical training and experience but can no longer kneel on the floor to get my CPR certification for example. I'm doing what I can to stay healthy and mobile, but there isn't a lot I can do to "get better". I want to at least make sure that I am not a "burden" - that I can contribute to the cause. I know that sometimes when I'm with my daughter (500 miles away) and want to help, she'd rather have me watch the kids and let her do the heavy work. Gives her a break and gives me time with the grandkids.

These suggestions have been excellent. I even thought of some myself like learning to use a ham radio. And the community newsletter capability was also an excellent idea.

Grammabarb, you make me laugh and give me hope. I'm Irish too. Well, I always thought I was. Found out my grandfather came from Northern Ireland with an English name, so not so sure any more.


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## Elizabeth (Jun 4, 2002)

There are many, many times that I wish we had an extra body around here to help out with watching our toddler while hubby and I work outside. My in-laws are awesome, love our daughter, and enjoy spending time with her, but they live 15 miles away and it isn't always convenient for them to watch her. But, if we had someone who lived in, or even lived right in the neighborhood, it would be a huge help. 

We could also use someone to help with meal preparation during the Spring, Summer, and Fall so that we could stay outside working longer instead of having to stop work to start supper.

And if that person could also do some sewing, THAT would be another huge help. And maybe laundry, too. There are plenty of "light" chores to be done even if it is something as simple as watching the baby so that the younger, stronger, healthier folks can work on the "heavier" jobs.

Don't underestimate your value in a SHTF scenario. Around here your help would be welcome.

I would try to feel your friends out for their thoughts on what the possibilities are. Maybe by discussing it in advance you can all come to an agreement about what you could contribute to the group so that you can prepare in advance. Maybe you could start stocking up on items which would be needed by the group which you could then contribute if/when the SHTF.


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## Piney Woods (Jul 5, 2006)

Elizabeth, your post brought to mind the movie "Places in the Heart" where the blind man prepared and served food, played his records and kept everyone else abreast of what was happening on the road as far as when other cotton picking crews arrived.


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## where I want to (Oct 28, 2008)

It depends on what you want most. If you want independence and privacy, the you need to accept risk and hard work. Having a couple of productive acres, no matter where, will be work. Unless you can afford to hire everything done, which has it's own risks, you will be the one to lift that load and tote that bale. 
And that means accepting that the risk that you will not have help right there. You can minimize it but not eliminate it. 
Maybe a suburban lot near family is a good place if that does not seem attractive to you. You could build a small house that is suitable for getting older independently and a small garden to raise what you can - maybe some chickens too. And still be near services you feel are needed.


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## GrammaBarb (Dec 27, 2012)

Hi Folks,

Piney, I believe "Irish" can be a state of mind--I have people in the Republic and in the north, so--there ya go!

To the subject at hand--ahem--I'll "come out" as they say: I'm 66, had my first heart attack while scuba diving back in 1987, am on my 6th implanted defibrillator, and have to take meds for Parkinsons. Disabled? Huh! Not much! I still kick-start some of my old bikes that don't have electric starters, and I stack and move around 6 or 7 cord of wood each year. I move more slowly, but can still tap a target with a 45-70 Trapdoor carbine out at my brother's place! 

Again, I think disability or advancing age is a state of mind....and, of course, body. I can't do what my son can do and I wouldn't even attempt to keep up with my granddaughters, but I do push myself a bit and try to stay at the top edge of fit, considering my age and the condition of my heart. In 2010, I went solo on a 30 year old BMW motorcycle from home in Washington State across the country to North Carolina for a bike rally, and back home again. There are plenty of things we "Old Folks" can do if we try them....as I like to remark to the next generation, "We can do the thinking, they can do the doing!" 

Barb---World's oldest teenager (Don't call her on it, she really believes it is true...)


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## damoc (Jul 14, 2007)

stuck my nose in here a little scared it was a girls only thread that i always regret reading.

piney something that is not as apreciated as it should be is the ability to
cook and cook well from basic ingredients or wild ingredients while ensuring everybody in your group/family is getting the nutrition they need

its incredibly important to health,moral and survival and most young people just cant do it they have not had the time to learn even if they were interested.


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## Txsteader (Aug 22, 2005)

Piney Woods said:


> Would like to hear suggestions on what someone in my situation might do if SHTF. Join a like-minded group of people? Bug out on my own? Is there room in a prepper group for an old lady that can't do the hard work? I can sew, I'm learning to can, I can watch kids.... But so can a lot of other people.
> 
> Your thoughts appreciated.


A lot of other people may be able to cook, but can they make hamburger buns or a good baguette? A lot of other people can sew, but can they do alterations or make a wedding dress? A lot of other people can watch kids, but can they teach them how to paint/sew/cook/carve/weld/butcher/hunt/play piano?

The point being, try to turn your basic skills into some type of specialty that others aren't necessarily doing, but that would be, at the very least, contributory or possibly even in great demand.


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## Jim-mi (May 15, 2002)

Over time I have read a lot about "bugging out"
And I am of the feeling that this would not be a good thing at all for an "older" woman..........

There could be a long list of reasons not to bug out..........

I have discarded the idea of bugging out for my self......


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## GoldenCityMuse (Apr 15, 2009)

Sewing is a great skill to have. Especially when it comes to repairing and altering clothes. 
Maybe have your sewing machine and supplies, like needles lots of thread, zippers, snaps, buttons, etc all packed up in a few containers. 

Teaching kids to sew would be a very useful skill.


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## Fire-Man (Apr 30, 2005)

Piney Woods Do a Little Personal Prepping, dress up and Hit The Town and Find you a Good man in good health to be a Help-Mate to you, Could Make Life Better---LOL.

I was alone for a while, trying to take care of the farm---now things are so much better with my Help-Mate!


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## Lilith (Dec 29, 2012)

My Gran just celebrated her 79'th B-day, and she is a huge part of our prepping plans. Having been born in 1932, her and her sister (11 months younger) ended up in foster care before her 3rd birthday. She remained in foster care until she skipped town and married my grandfather at the age of 16. Point being that her childhood was during the great depression, and people mostly took in foster kids to gain a free set of hands to work a farm. Most places considered her cheap labor by the age of 5. The benefit of this is she has lived a life that taught her how to "make do". Her knowledge and skills are amazing! 
When my family (including my siblings and parents and a select few family friends) decided to begin prepping, there was great debate on who was going to take responsibility for my gran. They all had to pick up their jaws when I quickly called dibs. It had never occurred to me that the rest of the family viewed her as a feeble old woman that would be a burden. My father even objected as I have 5 kids to take care of. I pointed out that I would require more resources to feed my family than any other household, so having a built in baby sitter who could teach them to read and write and cook and clean and sew, and pull weeds would be to my favor while I was out taking care of other things. I also pointed out that even if / when she started to loose her memory, she would revert to her younger days when her life was incredibly difficult and food was scarce. Her skills and knowledge should not be wasted, and I want them all. Then others in my family tried to call dibs for themselves. Well guess what, I called dibs first. 

WTSHTF, Gran is coming to my place, end of story! Lucky for me, she has said she would like nothing better. 

When I think of a little old woman living by herself, I think of all the grandmothers from the old stories and fables. In every fairy tale, there is a little old woman who lives out in the woods somehow making a living for herself. How cool is Red ridding hood's grandmother? Big bad wolf on the loose, and grandma is out there like nothing can shake her. She knows where to gather her berries, and probably snares a few rabbits for meat. She can trade her wool from her sheep (who eat for free in the meadow) for things she needs from others. She can collect her honey from wild hives. Fish can be caught in baskets in the rivers. Only grandmother knows the secrets well enough to live in sync with her wold like that.

So for all the "old" women worried here, take a good look at what your life has taught you, and evaluate what you have to offer up for trade. Then, take that into consideration while you figure out what to do. Worst case scenario, you fade into memory as the crazy old witch out there in the woods who will eat wandering children. How is that for a sense of security?


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## Txsteader (Aug 22, 2005)

Lilith said:


> My Gran just celebrated her 79'th B-day, and she is a huge part of our prepping plans. Having been born in 1932, her and her sister (11 months younger) ended up in foster care before her 3rd birthday. She remained in foster care until she skipped town and married my grandfather at the age of 16. Point being that her childhood was during the great depression, and people mostly took in foster kids to gain a free set of hands to work a farm. Most places considered her cheap labor by the age of 5. The benefit of this is she has lived a life that taught her how to "make do". Her knowledge and skills are amazing!
> When my family (including my siblings and parents and a select few family friends) decided to begin prepping, there was great debate on who was going to take responsibility for my gran. They all had to pick up their jaws when I quickly called dibs. It had never occurred to me that the rest of the family viewed her as a feeble old woman that would be a burden. My father even objected as I have 5 kids to take care of. I pointed out that I would require more resources to feed my family than any other household, so having a built in baby sitter who could teach them to read and write and cook and clean and sew, and pull weeds would be to my favor while I was out taking care of other things. I also pointed out that even if / when she started to loose her memory, she would revert to her younger days when her life was incredibly difficult and food was scarce. Her skills and knowledge should not be wasted, and I want them all. Then others in my family tried to call dibs for themselves. Well guess what, I called dibs first.
> 
> WTSHTF, Gran is coming to my place, end of story! Lucky for me, she has said she would like nothing better.
> ...


You're a wise woman. 

I was thinking about this as well last night. One advantage that seniors have over younger folks is life skills and wisdom. As I tell my kids/grandkids, 'I went down that road 40 years ago', meaning I've already learned the lessons.

Having knowledge is one thing, but _wisdom_ is extremely valuable, particularly in hard times & can potentially make the difference between life and death.


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## GrammaBarb (Dec 27, 2012)

Reading over the posts, I noticed that carding and spinning wool hadn't been mentioned. It's yet another skill that once was common and now would be very valuable, unless everyone wants to wear tanned hides......and there again is another skill. Tanning.

Something else that always makes me grin.....think about the traditional skills of elderly women. Lots of them put Gramma right indoors next to the fire. Pretty smart, huh? Stay warm, teach the children, spin a little wool.....I can think of worse ways to pass a winter. (Numb and watching endless TV, for example..)

Simple thiings---my girls (Granddaughters, twin 11 year-olds) really love figuring out how to operate my treadle sewing machine. The hand, eye, foot coordination is interesting until you get used to it, and they enjoy the experience. So that's something else we Olde Folks are good for. (Gee, when you think about it, we're pretty valuable! I think we should raise our prices....)

Barb, about to fetch more tea...


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## Bettacreek (May 19, 2012)

To be honest, in a group setting/community, I'd rather have an extra older lady in the group. I'm sure you don't eat as much as most younger folks, and that leaves able-bodied folks free from child watching to go out and get stuff done. But, bugging out would be difficult, if not in a group with smaller children, since young adults are going to want to move fast and it might not be possible for you. What advantage you do definitely have is experience. I can see a bunch of young bucks killing themselves off trying to be macho and not heeding elders,
etc. You'd be surprised how many people cannot sew, don't know squat about putting a seed in the dirt and creating food, etc.

In all honesty, folks who are worth YOUR time are going to understand and respect your value. If they don't, they probably aren't the group you want to be with anyways, as obviously they aren't smart enough to see value and know that you can be a big boost to their survivability... If they can't see that, what other survival issues are they blind to?

Eta, an older man might be a different story. In my experience, they tend to be bull-headed, won't adapt to the situation, etc. It's their way or no way. Yes, often they're right, but they also often cause problems and set backs, lol. Just my experience!


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## manygoatsnmore (Feb 12, 2005)

Weeeellll now, the more I read, the more I figure I'm an asset, even if I can't chop wood all day long. Experience has taught me to work smarter, not harder. Do a bit at a time, then shift jobs, do a bit, then shift back. Years of living on my own has meant learning how to do a lot of what are normally considered "mens' jobs", from sharpening and running a chain saw, to building sheds and much more. Necessity has lead me to learning to shoot accurately, skin, butcher and preserve meats. Interest has drawn me into the garden, and into a career in nursing. Even when I'm an old lady, less able than I am today in my 50's, I'll still have knowledge and skills to teach others.


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## pamda (Oct 14, 2004)

I love my mom...but in a pinch she will never be any good. She can always stay with me no matter what. She will not be allowed influence with any small children, she treats them awful...but in the long run, she will not make it long without her tv and recliner anyway. So when it comes right down to it, no matter what happens I will be caring for one not so helpful person. And she will be the only one. 


I am almost 58, and forget I am not old. Until I over do, and over do comes way sooner now than it did even last year. I hope if it is needed I can find several like minded people to gather with to get things done. Heck,I'd like that now.


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## Bettacreek (May 19, 2012)

Oh, geez. "Older lady", my hat. When you said that, I was thinking late 70's or something, lol. I'm 24, but the boyfriend is 64, and I don't think of him as "old" either. Sounds like you might be in better shape than most folks my age or even older teens, since they mostly seem to play video games and watch tv, eating junk food and never carrying anything heavier than their newest smart phone. I'm not in the best shape myself, 100lb bags of feed are rough for me to carry anymore. Like you said, being single, you do more. Living with a helpful partner, instead of my worthless ex husband, has made me lazy and not nearly as fit as I used to be!


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