# farmersonly



## roadless

Anyone here on it? Hows that working for ya?


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## nehimama

@ Farmersonly, you take the same chances as you would with any other dating site. The same mix of characters - both good & bad. One redeeming feature is that this particular site attracts the demographic we homesteading ladies would find most appealing.


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## viggie

I just signed up to check it out. I don't know that I'll use it since you have to pay though.


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## catspjamas

viggie said:


> I just signed up to check it out. I don't know that I'll use it since you have to pay though.


Same here. I have a profile, but don't know if I want to pay for a membership.


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## NickieL

I meet so many people irl doing all kinds of activities... No way I'm trusting it to the internet. Someone from my housemates gun club was asking them about me... And he's got some nice guns he let me try at the range, but I don't think he could keep up with me lol! Lots of folks interested in a date... I'm just not ready.


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## Skittles2u

roadless said:


> Anyone here on it? Hows that working for ya?


I am on it, and not having much communication at all.

I have thought its because of either my age or that I'm still in California. The price is reasonable enough, but the only reason my subscription is paid is because I didn't cancel it in time, but come February I'm taking a break from it. 

Most of the flirts I get the person is usually a scammer and with a day they're profiles have been removed. 

I see some men I'd be interested in, but even when I initiate contact they don't respond.


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## billooo2

I was a member for a while. I found that most of the women were NOT farmers, but claimed to be "wanabees,"

I married a supposedly "wannabee"...........there can be a huge leap from "wannabee" to actually doing it...........providing DAILY care.milking, etc.

The 'romance' of farming can lose its 'glitter' when you spend a few hours trying to deliver a kid.......only to end up cold, soaked with blood, mud, and manure........and after all your efforts, you have a dead baby and a dead mother!!!

I am very skeptical of a "wannabee" that has not also experienced the pain and the heartache.


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## casusbelli

On Match.com, the women want someone to make them laugh (sorry, i'm not a comedian). They also want to travel the world (on whose $$$ ?). They love to exercise, but couldn't make a skillet of gravy if their lives depended on it. They also have 3 dogs, 2 cats, "family nearby", and are not willing to relocate (okay....so they'll attract men without roots, without a home, drifters, etc.)
On Farmersonly, the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old. Or they smoke. Those lucky few who have none of these negatives, however, possess acreage, horses, and....are not willing to relocate. (There are no Naomi's and Ruth's anymore.)
So the modern world has both sexes trapped. And many more single households than our ancestors could have conceived of.
Yes, I'll make enemies writing this. I don't care anymore. The truth always hurts....


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## Terri

Naomi and Ruth did not work the land! Instead they were gleaning.


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## rkintn

I don't think there are any decent online dating sites. It seems to attract a lot of weirdos and then I find myself wondering why am I there? I am I a weirdo too? Yes, I am a weirdo but not like the ones there. Ain't nobody got time for that! lol


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## viggie

casusbelli said:


> On Match.com, the women want someone to make them laugh (sorry, i'm not a comedian). They also want to travel the world (on whose $$$ ?). They love to exercise, but couldn't make a skillet of gravy if their lives depended on it. They also have 3 dogs, 2 cats, "family nearby", and are not willing to relocate (okay....so they'll attract men without roots, without a home, drifters, etc.)
> On Farmersonly, the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old. Or they smoke. Those lucky few who have none of these negatives, however, possess acreage, horses, and....are not willing to relocate. (There are no Naomi's and Ruth's anymore.)
> So the modern world has both sexes trapped. And many more single households than our ancestors could have conceived of.
> Yes, I'll make enemies writing this. I don't care anymore. The truth always hurts....


Doesn't sound like they are trapped. Sounds like they are picky. If she's successful as a farmer, she's out, because you are not going to make any effort to go to her. If she not shes just a wannabe with some physical attribute you'll pick to obsess over. I understand not everyone is for everyone, but that's just painting yourself into a corner on purpose.


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## Terri in WV

I believe it was moldy and rancher that met on FO. They were members here, but didn't connect until there.


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## catspjamas

casusbelli said:


> On Match.com, the women want someone to make them laugh (sorry, i'm not a comedian). They also want to travel the world (on whose $$$ ?). They love to exercise, but couldn't make a skillet of gravy if their lives depended on it. They also have 3 dogs, 2 cats, "family nearby", and are not willing to relocate (okay....so they'll attract men without roots, without a home, drifters, etc.)
> On Farmersonly, the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old. Or they smoke. Those lucky few who have none of these negatives, however, possess acreage, horses, and....are not willing to relocate. (There are no Naomi's and Ruth's anymore.)
> So the modern world has both sexes trapped. And many more single households than our ancestors could have conceived of.
> Yes, I'll make enemies writing this. I don't care anymore. The truth always hurts....


Whose truth? Yours? The only one you're hurting with that attitude is yourself. You're not coming across as anyone I want to take time to get to know.


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## starjj

I joined recently but the pickins are slim at best. I think it is my age (63)

I e-mailed one guy but then I noticed he was 63 looking for age range 30-47. Hardly any even close to me. I only signed for 3 month but I am not hopefull.


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## starjj

casusbelli said:


> On Match.com, the women want someone to make them laugh (sorry, i'm not a comedian). They also want to travel the world (on whose $$$ ?). They love to exercise, but couldn't make a skillet of gravy if their lives depended on it. They also have 3 dogs, 2 cats, "family nearby", and are not willing to relocate (okay....so they'll attract men without roots, without a home, drifters, etc.)
> On Farmersonly, the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old. Or they smoke. Those lucky few who have none of these negatives, however, possess acreage, horses, and....are not willing to relocate. (There are no Naomi's and Ruth's anymore.)
> So the modern world has both sexes trapped. And many more single households than our ancestors could have conceived of.
> Yes, I'll make enemies writing this. I don't care anymore. The truth always hurts....


Wow what an attitute. I probably fall into the too old range but then again that makes me the lucky one


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## casusbelli

Terri - by Naomi and Ruth I meant "thy people shall be my people" etc. Relocate, IOW. But I'd settle for gleaners if the gals don't know how to garden!

Others: Maybe I am picky. I had two grandmothers, one mother, and eight aunts. None of them were overweight, yet all knew how to cook, none divorced their husbands....


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## viggie

I'm overweight and can cook...zero divorces. Must be the exception! But I thought the saying was "Never trust a skinny cook"


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## starjj

viggie, It doesn't it is attitutes like his that causes it lol.


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## swamp man

Am I mistaken, or is that where Texican met his lady?
I was off and on with plentyoffish (a different dating site), dated a few nice people, made some friends, and had a grip of bedroom romps, but never met one who "stuck". 
I've met more quality gals here, on a gardening site, and other sites that ain't oriented towards dating. I think the difference is, everybody gets more of a glimpse of someone's real character before they put their "game face" on and go into "dating mode"...Here, what I see is who y'all really are, rather than who you want me to think you are. It is, I think, a more honest introduction.


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## casusbelli

Like I said, i don't care who thinks what about me. It's true, no matter how offended any of you get: in the 1940's one American woman out of 20 was obese. Today it's closer to 50%. So they shouldn't belly ache that they're single. It's a real turn-off for many guys (a few like it). And guys can't 'fake it'....
I take care of myself, and expect any partner to. If I don't find anyone that fits my expectations, I'll stay single. Their loss.....


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## viggie

I didn't realize it was only women. Thought that was the entire population. Huh. The things I'm learning.


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## casusbelli

Oh, and the reason for America's weight problem is AFFLUENZA, the disease of having too much. Dirt cheap and easy food thanks to Fiat currency, debt culture, cheap petroleum yielding cheap crop, fast-food restaurants etc. Oh, and too little manual/muscle labor, etc etc. A corrupt modern culture and finance system.


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## casusbelli

there is a higher % of overwt women than men. But men probably top women in # lbs overwt. 
I never said today's men are anything to brag about. actually the reverse. Men without chests, as C S Lewis said....


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## viggie

I think you are right in a way though. One look at me and I wouldn't stand a chance finding someone on a farmers dating site. Doesn't matter how hard I work, how much I workout, how well I eat, how much I do for myself, how much I enjoy the outdoors and all the things they complain about women not joining them doing, how I do the work of an entire homesteading family here myself, how I've worked construction and on loading docks and have the strength and determination to work side by side on a farm with someone...I'm still just fat and lazy in someone elses eyes. 

It's pretty hard to find the true partner when most people are looking for arm candy they know is a bad fit.


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## farmerj

the only dating site I found worth while was adult friend finder. At least people were open about what they were looking for. Plenty of Fish, Match.com and a couple others, the "hinting" was there but it was subversive. Most of the time, the people were someone I would never trust past buying a drink at a bar. And I was never into the bar scene either.

The last gal I met, we got married this past August and have now been together since 2008.


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## casusbelli

Fat is not = lazy. 
Fat IS = too many calories. Period. Those few with true hormone deficits need medical intervention. Most need will-power and diversions - less time to think about food, less access, and more reasons to stay slim.


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## viggie

Yeah except I've had my metabolism tested and have an armband that measures calorie burn, and it averages 1300. Try eating less than that every day sometime  Lunches in the cafeteria at the work approach that amount regularly. I'm literally always on a diet. And I have a home gym that, in an unusual twist, does see action regularly.

But what does it matter. I'm still worthless because of it.


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## casusbelli

No one, no human is worthless. 
No one in my family is overwt, and my folks would mildly demean those who were. So that's the way I'm programmed, maybe it's my problem. There are many skinny women however that I wouldn't be caught dead with. Personality is more important. But I can't fake what isn't there, re: attraction and all that. Some men don't care. 
But America does have a problem. But it is one of many...


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## Terri in WV

Sometimes attitude is more ugly than any physical attribute will ever be...


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## Laura

Terri in WV said:


> Sometimes attitude is more ugly than any physical attribute will ever be...


 I agree Terri. I like happy easygoing men.


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## Fowler

Casus, being close minded could keep you from finding the love of all time. I will admit I am not immediantly attracted to an over weight guy, but I stay open minded and get to know the person, sometimes the attraction comes from within. Which makes them very attractive. Just sayin keep an open mind, pics can be decieving and meeting people in general is not a bad thing no matter what they weigh.


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## roadless

If someone I find physically attractive is intentionally cruel or rude to another any attraction I had simply disappears.


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## newfieannie

yes, I'm almost sure that's where Texican met Brenda? (I think). he was on at the same time I was. I haven't had a profile on for a couple years.you do take your chance like every other site. I met a guy I thought was going to work out. he was only about 40 miles down the shore from me. I was about to have him come to the house but something he said one night on the phone put me off. like Bill said there's a big leap from wannabee to actually doing it. I did talk to several from the US and I've no doubt if I was there I could have found a like minded person. right quick.just too far from me at the time. ~Georgia.


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## Terri

The finest man I know is about a hundred pounds overweight: he is my husband. I am not a bit offended if a woman does not wish to date him: he is taken! In a world full of trouble, he brings joy to my life, and my only fear is that I might outlive him. 

Then again, nobody can fake an interest that is not there. The heart wants what the heart wants. THAT DOES NOT MEAN THERE IS ANYTHING WRONG WITH HEAVY PEOPLE! The economy bites, the politicians are lying, and too many businesses have been boarded op. So, Jane Doe or Joe Blow is a little fluffy? Eh. Whatever. I have yet to meet anybody who is perfect. Fluffy is better than corrupt. Fluffy I can live with Fluffy is no problem at all......:kiss:

Personally I am attracted to TALL men! All of you short people, try to add a few inches to your HEIGHT! That does not mean that there is a thing wrong with short people, just that they are not my cup of tea. Is that shallow of me? Oh, well. I will stay with my 6 foot tall sweetie, while my daughter obviously prefers a man who is her height. She has brought home some very fine men who are just about 5'8", which happens to be her height!:rock:

The heart wants what the heart wants.

Short guys are fine: there is not a darn thing wrong with being short: I should know because I am 5' 2" tall myself. 

Casusbelli, if you are not attracted to women who are a bit zoftig, that is fine. That honestly is fine. 

You have no way of knowing if a zoftig woman is lazy, though, so you might ease up on those comments as there are many non-lazy people here who will get cranky if you insist that they are. My own sweetie works 10-12 hours a day, at a DESK, and then he volenteers on weekends. He is not lazy, he just weighs too much. Which is nobody else's business but his. He is an adult and he deals with it.


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## newfieannie

I think I've remembered it was Donna with Texican. if I'm not mistaken it was Brenda with Wilhelm but they are not together now or they weren't the last time she was on. didn't Andy and Roo get together. not sure if they are still a couple. I miss Andy on S and E. he was very informative. ~Georgia.


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## starjj

It is OK to not be attractive to an overweight person (me it is much more important as to the personality) but to lump all overweight people into a catagory is wrong and says much more about you then the other person. Like the 63 year old man I was talking about who is looking for 30-47 year old women. Seems to me that is saying a lot about the kind of person he is. I find it as offensive to dismiss some one because their not the right age just as much as if they are overweight. If your going to just go by an outside feature or age that to me says you are mighty shallow.


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## Fowler

I'm not fat! I'm just big boned! And sarcastic...LOL


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## newfieannie

well you know there's overweight and then there's overweight
. my love was probably 75 lbs overweight. he carried it well though and to me he was lovely. every part of him. then there was the 400 lb guy that knocked me into the canned food section this morning and left a bruise on my hip that's getting darker every minute. I couldn't go for that. and I don't think I'm shallow. there's also a guy on one of the dating sites who says he doesn't want an overweight woman. his pic is there and he's like a beanpole. I can understand him. jmo, moo. ~Georgia.


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## Kiamichi Kid

roadless said:


> Anyone here on it? Hows that working for ya?


Yes .. I am on FarmersOnly...and no I've not had a great deal of success.
Many of the stereotypical problems mentioned here by both genders I see there in great numbers.
It appears quite unlikely that I'll find a partner there where we share a " mutual" attraction.... as I am NOT wealthy, do not own a large farm/ranch ,don't own any horses,I do want someone that s reasonably fit,someone that doesn't smoke or use drugs ,doesn't have an std or a criminal record. And I am nowhere near the 6'0 to 6'7 foot tall ranges that seems to be the "average" height most of the women there are looking for....even the ones that are 5'0 tall and less..
I consider myself to be somewhat open minded,reasonably intelligent, well educated both formally and @ The School of Life..Not too Ugly ..I am multifaceted in my interests,skills and life goals..I have a hunger for knowledge and adventure..And yet somehow I never seem to appeal to those that appeal to me..

P.S. And I love to sing and dance


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## NickieL

I'd date ya lol. If I were looking. I'm too angry yet at the x to date. Wouldn't be fair to anyone lol. 



Kiamichi Kid said:


> Yes .. I am on FarmersOnly...and no I've not had a great deal of success.
> 
> Many of the stereotypical problems mentioned here by both genders I see there in great numbers.
> 
> It appears quite unlikely that I'll find a partner there where we share a " mutual" attraction.... as I am NOT wealthy, do not own a large farm/ranch ,don't own any horses,I do want someone that s reasonably fit,someone that doesn't smoke or use drugs ,doesn't have an std or a criminal record. And I am nowhere near the 6'0 to 6'7 foot tall ranges that seems to be the "average" height most of the women there are looking for....even the ones that are 5'0 tall and less..
> 
> I consider myself to be somewhat open minded,reasonably intelligent, well educated both formally and @ The School of Life..Not too Ugly ..I am multifaceted in my interests,skills and life goals..I have a hunger for knowledge and adventure..And yet somehow I never seem to appeal to those that appeal to me..
> 
> 
> 
> P.S. And I love to sing and dance


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## COSunflower

Viggie  Don't give up!!! There is someone for you - you just haven't met them yet. My BF lives a couple houses down from me in my little community and I hadn't done anything but wave to him as he passed during the last 8 years. Then last summer we were introduced at a yard sale of a mutual friend and things have gone from there as we found that we have alot in common...  We are both overweight but I don't see that when I look at him. I see his kind spirit, sense of humor and intelligence. He must see SOMETHING that he likes in me also!  We have such a good time together and NEITHER of us is lazy. We are ALWAYS working on some kind of project. He was a disiel (sp?) mechanic in Alaska and Greenland for 14 years and then worked at a local mill till he retired. A definate woodsbum - makes me think of Elkhound. I have always worked in nursing and education and am still working plus own my little hobby farm and take care of it myself. I am pretty much a vegetarian and as organic as I can possibly be for this area. I look back at my family genealogy photos and almost all of the women were overweight. Must me my German and Irish ancestry. I look just like both of my Grandmothers. There IS someone out there, and probably local, that will appreciate YOU and not hold your weight against you. You never know where you might meet them!


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## Kiamichi Kid

:runforhills:


NickieL said:


> I'd date ya lol. If I were looking. I'm too angry yet at the x to date. Wouldn't be fair to anyone lol.


Yeah..it takes lots of time to heal wounds..


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## Malamute

Kiamichi Kid said:


> ...And yet somehow I never seem to appeal to those that appeal to me..


I know what you mean.

I've been on Fish. It hasnt been particularly succesful. Met a few nice women, just no sparks or truly compatible. Seem to be a lot of "Hi, wow! Blah blah,..." then they fall off the face of the earth after a few messages. Talking to others, it seems to be the norm. The other hard part is, many are settled in their life/location, and dont really want to relocate, or at least not to where I am. I feel much the same way, so,...


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## catspjamas

casusbelli said:


> No one, no human is worthless.
> No one in my family is overwt, and my folks would mildly demean those who were. So that's the way I'm programmed, maybe it's my problem. There are many skinny women however that I wouldn't be caught dead with. Personality is more important. But I can't fake what isn't there, re: attraction and all that. Some men don't care.
> But America does have a problem. But it is one of many...


It is very much YOUR problem. And it is YOUR loss, not ours. You don't take the time to meet and get to know the real person, all you see is the outside. And because they don't fit your "ideal", they're losers.

It's not about weight, it's about attitude, and your attitude is that people are losers and you have a list of what makes them loser, they're overweight, they won't relocate, etc. No one is attracted to a negative attitude, and that is what YOUR problem is. You could look like Adonis, but with that negative attitude, sorry, not interested. And you're not going to find a REAL woman, you're only going to find shallow people that seem to meet your ideal, but have nothing to offer.


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## littlejoe

I tried the FO site for a year. Met one really sweet gal, but circumstances did not let me pursue beyond a couple of dates. We stayed in touch for a couple of years, but it wasn't strong enough for me to whittle a canoe and make a voyage. 

Another I met was just a seemingly nice gal, but had a hard time understanding "not interested. The third had me hook line and sinker, before I had even met her. Drove six hours and got stood up. That was an eye opener for me to realize, not all are truthful! Liars and thieves are all in the same boat, and that boat should go down. 

After that, I prefer knowing potential dates. ie, knowing them IRL. At one time I thought there were no datable gals in my vicinity. My eyes have since been opened to mid-America small town girls! There's a wealth of them here! If you think you have nothing in common, you'll never know unless you take a moment once in a while to talk?

Not to take away from any venue that people can meet one another. Everything and anything should broaden our horizons. I've casually thought 'bout FO again. Might broaden my horizons?

I like this site because it allows glimpses into a persons life. Some I would rather stay away from, but that is easy enough. I've never met a soul from this site, but looks to me like some terrific ladies here!


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## casusbelli

Terri said:


> You have no way of knowing if a zoftig woman is lazy, though, so you might ease up on those comments as there are many non-lazy people here who will get cranky if you insist that they are. My own sweetie works 10-12 hours a day, at a DESK, and then he volenteers on weekends. He is not lazy, he just weighs too much. Which is nobody else's business but his. He is an adult and he deals with it.


Terri: you're letting your own stereotypes show through, maybe? Because if you really read my comments, I never said fat people were lazy. In fact I wrote "Fat is not = lazy".
I said too many farmersonly ladies were heavy, and that's a fact. too many men may be too, but I don't look at their profiles!
I do get tired of seeing so many women with cute faces, in the 20 or 30's, but they're overweight. It is disheartening. I want to tell them "you're only young once! why are you wasting it!" not to mention the long term health effects.
Laura, and the one above her: if the truth is ugly, then I'll always choose ugliness! And I don't really care whether you'd choose me


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## casusbelli

Fowler-
thanks for the wise words. You may be right.
However, if a woman is too heavy when she's 'looking', what will she be 5 years after she's hooked her man? TOO risky.
I know a man once, who was so kind he took his wife's last name and hyphenated both of theirs together. Their wedding picture showed two healthy trim people. 15 years later she was slovenly and weighed 50 lbs more than he did. How does that show any respect for his wishes, his pride, his feelings??? Probably resented it internally, but kept mum. Ah, tolerance and self-esteem! Respect is often a one-way street with some of you.


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## doingitmyself

A goodly amount of patience displayed here tonight. I must go for a walk to get some air.


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## littlejoe

casusbelli... I respect you for your honesty in what you expect.

What will change if something happens to you to cause weight gain, since it's one of your fears?


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## Terri in WV

casusbelli said:


> Laura, and the one above her: if the truth is ugly, then I'll always choose ugliness!


And from your postings, it seems as if you have. Hope it works well for you.


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## rkintn

Weight can be gained and lost but ugly lasts forever.

When ever I see someone so adamant about a physical trait as a deal breaker, I see someone who doesn't really want a significant other in their life. When you are so closed minded and closed hearted, it doesn't matter what you are looking for because you will never find it.


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## Terri

casusbelli said:


> Because if you really read my comments, I never said fat people were lazy. In fact I wrote "Fat is not = lazy".


 You are entirely correct: you did say that. 

I misinterpreted your comment "Oh, and too little manual/muscle labor", but as we know working hard on the job often means desk work in today's society.


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## SimplerTimez

casusbelli said:


> Fowler-
> thanks for the wise words. You may be right.
> However, if a woman is too heavy when she's 'looking', what will she be 5 years after she's hooked her man? TOO risky.
> I know a man once, who was so kind he took his wife's last name and hyphenated both of theirs together. Their wedding picture showed two healthy trim people. 15 years later she was slovenly and weighed 50 lbs more than he did. How does that show any respect for his wishes, his pride, his feelings??? Probably resented it internally, but kept mum. Ah, tolerance and self-esteem! Respect is often a one-way street with some of you.


Wow. Just wow. My late husband gained quite a bit of weight over our marriage. Never changed what I felt about him as a person and a partner. I surely hope you don't find a beautiful, fit companion and then face something SERIOUS like cancer, heart failure, renal failure, dementia or such. If a bit of weight gain bothers you so much, I can't imagine how you'd deal with infirmity or something that is a true challenge and test of love.

Best wishes to you sir.

~ST


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## memc

wow! I like a little meat with my taters carrots are good to.


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## BlueRose

I am about 20# overweight. However, that is not my 'dating' problem. I have many scars do to a birth defect and an a very abusive ex. So if you see my outside and don't give my inside a chance to shine, it is their lost, right?


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## Raeven

Step BACK, ladies -- BACK, I say!!! Form a line... this could ALL BE YOURS!!


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## Terri in WV

I'll step waaaayyy back! I want to give the others plenty of room. :spinsmiley:


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## starjj

Well some of us have been really lucky to be crossed off the list or to do the crossing off ourselves. Proud to see many level headed women on here.

As for the woman that gained weight after her marriage that goes both ways. Perhaps her husband stayed with her because he LOVED her but that may be a too far fetched idea for you.

You don't stop loving a person because they gain weight, have a serious illness, or become disabled. If you do then you didn't really love them deeply enough at the beginning.

ME last me last in line pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee


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## doingitmyself

In another forum i visit there is an ignore setting. So hypothetically speaking if i wanted to ignore someone and not see their self loathing macho BS here is there any such setting here on ST?


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## Raeven

doingitmyself said:


> In another forum i visit there is an ignore setting. So hypothetically speaking if i wanted to ignore someone and not see their self loathing macho BS here is there any such setting here on ST?


Yes. I don't use it, but I'm tempted tonight.  You'll find it in User CP.


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## viggie

doingitmyself said:


> In another forum i visit there is an ignore setting. So hypothetically speaking if i wanted to ignore someone and not see their self loathing macho BS here is there any such setting here on ST?




Go to their profile and right under their name is a link for user lists. It lets you add them to an ignore list there.


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## Terri in WV

doingitmyself said:


> In another forum i visit there is an ignore setting. So hypothetically speaking if i wanted to ignore someone and not see their self loathing macho BS here is there any such setting here on ST?





Raeven said:


> Yes. I don't use it, but I'm tempted tonight.  You'll find it in User CP.


Now where's the fun in that? :whistlin:


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## Terri

To put somebody on ignore, go to the upper left had corner and click on "user CP". Follow the column of options down the left hand side to Settings & Options. Choose edit ignore list. Follow the directions.


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## Guest

casusbelli said:


> Like I said, i don't care who thinks what about me. It's true, no matter how offended any of you get: in the 1940's one American woman out of 20 was obese. Today it's closer to 50%. So they shouldn't belly ache that they're single. It's a real turn-off for many guys (a few like it). And guys can't 'fake it'....
> I take care of myself, and expect any partner to. If I don't find anyone that fits my expectations, I'll stay single. Their loss.....


Happy to see you posting again..You do sound unlike your old wittier self though..sorry to read such negative thoughts from you..wishing you more smiles


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## casusbelli

Thanks, Boston!
You're the kindest person here. I never hit anyone on here personally, just speaking my mind about obesity in general. All the frazzled nerves makes me think I hit a sensitive spot. If your spouse is "75 pounds overweight" and you really love them, you won't keep silent and ignore it. It'll kill them. Not that one should nag - that's a marriage-killer. But playing the "emperor has no clothes" game will make you a widow or widower before your time. But you all suit yourself. 
Hope everyone sleeps a good self-righteous sleep. But most of you are phonies: you ganged up on me over the weight issue (which is under most folk's control) but gave me a free pass on things people can't change: looks and age. Congrats! Everyone (including me) got an "F", except Fowler and Boston. 
Adios


----------



## swamp man

roadless said:


> If someone I find physically attractive is intentionally cruel or rude to another any attraction I had simply disappears.


 Quoted 'cuz it bears repeating.
I absolutely, positively agree.
Case in point, a gal I met through POF a few years back, very much a hottie by typical standards, we talked on the phone some, and she seemed like a nice gal, so we made plans to meet for dinner. Being the moron that I am, I had her meet me at a steakhouse that had apparently been closed down for quite a while. By the time we made a new plan in the weed-filled parking lot, it was real dang late, but we found a place who's bar area was still open, but it was later than what they had listed as "kitchen hours"....I'm pretty sure they fired up the kitchen just for us (we were the only patrons there), and she was just EXTREMELY rude and demeaning towards the man waiting our table 'cuz she thought we waited too long. That alone bothered me, but it really felt like she was chewing the man out just because she could, when in reality, he and staff had done gone above and beyond the call of duty to accommodate us. This really pretty, witty lady immediately became repulsive to me, and I felt bad for even taking her to the restaurant even though it was her that was being a rude, heartless wench. I ate a plate of food that I was too bothered to enjoy, gave the man a $20 tip, apologized on her behalf, and not only knew she warn't the girl for me, but just a low-down, dirty dog in general. She wanted to come home, I smoked the obligatory "after supper" cigarette, told her "see ya" , and she got a real surprised look on her face when I got in my truck and skinned out. 
I'll put up with a lot of things. Being mean-spirited, having a sense of entitlement, jabbing at someone while they're just tryin' to make a living, and tryin' to get treated all special just 'cuz somebody bought a $20 steak AINT on the list, though.


----------



## RubyRed

If memory serves me right, I remember when casusbelli posted a very eye appealing photo of his physique awhile back. Many, if not most of the women here on Singletree were extremely interested and that photo grabbed their attention. With many woots, atta boy's, and hubba hubba's...Now, I would venture to guess, that many of those women that were duly impressed with the eye candy in front of them, wouldn't have fit in the same category of their wonderment. 

So, with that being said. Casusbelli expresses his preferred body type, to match his lifestyle and physical value. Why hold him to standards, when one is not willing to hold themselves to? 

He is being honest and forthright, a quality that many women complain about, when it comes to men.


----------



## rkintn

Nobody here gives a rats behind whether you like fat girls or not. What we are all reacting to is your attitude and how you choose to express it. Your lack of tact and diplomacy is what turned your audience against you. 

I would take a nice man who is grossly overweight yet who knows how to get his point across without coming across as a pompous know it all, all day long vs a physically attractive man who can't. 
I despise rude behavior in a man.

Ii


----------



## catspjamas

RubyRed said:


> If memory serves me right, I remember when casusbelli posted a very eye appealing photo of his physique awhile back. Many, if not most of the women here on Singletree were extremely interested and that photo grabbed their attention. With many woots, atta boy's, and hubba hubba's...Now, I would venture to guess, that many of those women that were duly impressed with the eye candy in front of them, wouldn't have fit in the same category of their wonderment.
> 
> So, with that being said. Casusbelli expresses his preferred body type, to match his lifestyle and physical value. Why hold him to standards, one is not willing to hold themselves to?
> 
> He is being honest and forthright, a quality that many women complain about, when it comes to men.


Honest and forthright? He's being a donkey's behind. This is what I was offended by:



casusbelli said:


> in the 1940's one American woman out of 20 was obese. Today it's closer to 50%. So they shouldn't belly ache that they're single.


He's stating that overweight women are single because of their weight, which is a load of BS. He's also alluded that overweight women are lazy, he didn't come right out and say it, but it's there. I have no problems with a man that stays fit and healthy wanting the same from his partner, which is why I'd never go after a marathon runner. But don't try and tell me that weight is a factor in whether someone is alone or not. There are dating sites expressly for big, beautiful women.


----------



## elkhound

i am fat...and not to good looking either...but i sure am sexy as all get out.

plump,chubby,fat,big boned people rock in my world.....lol


----------



## RubyRed

catspjamas said:


> Honest and forthright? He's being a donkey's behind. This is what I was offended by:


Because why? Are you offended because you are overweight? Well, so am I, gotta love menopause...not. But I surely am not going to become upset because someone has an opinion to that. Now, if he has come out and called someone very insulting terms and names, yes, that is uncalled for AND a donkey's rear.


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## elkhound

i am getting old and been busted up over the years...but i left many behind in the long distance walking of mtn ridges.


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## NickieL

I'm overweight, been since day one.  backpacked from Mexico to Canada one summer... Was still fat. Kayak, canoe, camp, hike, bike, garden.... Was even vegetarian for several years. Yup. Still fat. Ran every day and 5 miles on Sundays till I screwed up my knee. Yup. Was still fat. Got deathly I'll one time, dropped 50 lbs. was the weight I should be for my height then. Was still a size 10. But of do bony. Everyone told me to put weight on...

My weight has never been an issue with me getting dates in the past, nor offers while I was married.


----------



## Terri in WV

elkhound said:


> i am fat...and not to good looking either...


I think many of us here would completely disagree with this. You are the total package. Like some other men on this sight, your character makes you a gem.


----------



## elkhound

Terri in WV said:


> I think many of us here would completely disagree with this. You are the total package. Like some other men on this sight, your character makes you a gem.


i am an animal.....sasquatch....when i was 8 years old i was bigger than most teenagers...i wore size 12 shoe in the 6th grade....roflmao


----------



## NickieL

I see nothing unattractive here. 


elkhound said:


> i am an animal.....sasquatch.


----------



## elkhound

thats a old picture....heres one from last year...in last year i have dropped 40 pounds by getting rid of mtn dew habit....my beard has gone animal the last 3 months.i might post a picture here of it mid winter when i braid it.hard to believe i will be 48 come spring time.my heart says i am 12 though....lol...just a big corn fed bubba boy.....pass the taters please.


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## Terri in WV

See Elkie^^^^what'd I tell you?


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## NickieL

Your eyes look kind... They are very nice. Love that shot.


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## vicker

Cute, in a Sasquatch, yeti, drive your mama crazy kinda way.


----------



## Terri in WV

elkhound said:


> i am an animal.....sasquatch....when i was 8 years old i was bigger than most teenagers...i wore size 12 shoe in the 6th grade....roflmao


So was I. I've been my height since the 7th grade, talk about awkward for a girl. And I'm raising two boys that are the same, although you beat them in shoe size. They're size 11 and 12 in the 7th grade.


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## Terri in WV

vicker said:


> Cute, in a Sasquatch, yeti, drive your mama crazy kinda way.


And there are plenty of females that prefer that!!! :happy2:


----------



## NickieL

I've been at my height since 7th grade.... All 5 feet of it.....


----------



## elkhound

you shoulda seen the usfs trying to stuff me in a flight suit....lol....till they could find one that would go up over my shoulders....lol...i told them who you kidding..that thin suit wont save me if we crash while sitting on 200 gallons of jet fuel...pftttt....turn the rotors and lets fly...and we did....lol


----------



## nehimama

elkhound said:


> thats a old picture....heres one from last year...in last year i have dropped 40 pounds by getting rid of mtn dew habit....my beard has gone animal the last 3 months.i might post a picture here of it mid winter when i braid it.hard to believe i will be 48 come spring time.my heart says i am 12 though....lol...just a big corn fed bubba boy.....pass the taters please.


Hmmm. As another poster said, "Total package" there, M'dear! Ah! If only you were a few years older, or if *I* were several years younger. . . . . !!!


----------



## catspjamas

RubyRed said:


> Because why? Are you offended because you are overweight? Well, so am I, gotta love menopause...not. But I surely am not going to become upset because someone has an opinion to that. Now, if he has come out and called someone very insulting terms and names, yes, that is uncalled for AND a donkey's rear.


Reread my post, I explained why I was offended. He said overweight women are alone because of their weight. And he alluded to them being lazy. To me both statements are offensive because they are a load of BS and insulting. If overweight people aren't his cup of tea, that's fine, just don't make disparaging, untruthful comments about them. Basically, he's stereotyping overweight women, and that's being a donkey's rear.


----------



## catspjamas

elkhound said:


> thats a old picture....heres one from last year...in last year i have dropped 40 pounds by getting rid of mtn dew habit....my beard has gone animal the last 3 months.i might post a picture here of it mid winter when i braid it.hard to believe i will be 48 come spring time.my heart says i am 12 though....lol...just a big corn fed bubba boy.....pass the taters please.


Looking good to me. Now I have a good visual to go along with your dum dum sucker post. :teehee:


----------



## catspjamas

elkhound said:


> i am an animal.....sasquatch....when i was 8 years old i was bigger than most teenagers...i wore size 12 shoe in the 6th grade....roflmao


I think I was in the 4th grade before any boys were my height or taller. At 5'9", I'm the shortest in my family.


----------



## Vickie44

I always find people I like to be attractive. You are one of them ELK !


----------



## Laura Zone 5

Everyone has deal breakers.

For some it's smoking. 
Things like "kissing an ashtray, disgusting, smelly, etc' are the words used to describe a smoker.

For some it's drinking.
Things like "smells like a brewery, lack of self control, addicted' are words used to describe someone who 'casually' drinks.

For some it's body shape / size.
For some it's age.
For some it's political affiliation.....Lord have mercy the name calling that goes on there.
For some it's religious affiliation......Lord REALLY have mercy the name calling there.
For some it's location.
For some it's mindset (good heavens if you like living in a neighborhood and shopping at the mall......the names you will be called there too)

Everyone has deal breakers.



> On Match.com, the women want someone to make them laugh (sorry, i'm not a comedian). They also want to travel the world (on whose $$$ ?). They love to exercise, but couldn't make a skillet of gravy if their lives depended on it. They also have 3 dogs, 2 cats, "family nearby", and are not willing to relocate (okay....so they'll attract men without roots, without a home, drifters, etc.)


I assume you mean the majority of female profiles are the same? All seeking the same things as mentioned above?




> On Farmersonly, the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old. Or they smoke. Those lucky few who have none of these negatives, however, possess acreage, horses, and....are not willing to relocate. (There are no Naomi's and Ruth's anymore.)
> So the modern world has both sexes trapped. And many more single households than our ancestors could have conceived of.
> Yes, I'll make enemies writing this. I don't care anymore. The truth always hurts....


Dang.
I'm not heavy.
I'm not "too" ugly...
But I'm old and smoke.:yuck:
Crap.

But you know what?
I APPRECIATE the up front honesty.
I don't have to like your words, and I choose not to be offended by them at all.
They are just your opinion!
But bottom line, I appreciate the honesty!

And Swampman.....dang about the date treating her waiter like poop.
You can tell A LOT, really ALL you need to know about someone by the way they treat the waiter!!


----------



## RideBarefoot

Laura Zone 5 said:


> You can tell A LOT, really ALL you need to know about someone by the way they treat the waiter!!


I agree with the LOT part, but not all- the man I knew who was excellent with waitstaff was also the one who loaded up my dog, hauled him off and dumped him, and then had the nerve to accompany me to the shelters looking for him.

The dog is snoozing at my feet; don't care where he is.


----------



## starjj

casusbelli said:


> Thanks, Boston!
> Hope everyone sleeps a good self-righteous sleep. But most of you are phonies: you ganged up on me over the weight issue (which is under most folk's control) but gave me a free pass on things people can't change: looks and age. Congrats! Everyone (including me) got an "F", except Fowler and Boston.
> Adios


Actually I did mention age and gave an example of the man on FO who was 63 and looking for a 30-47 year old. He has a right to his preferences but if he is looking for someone who is 30 and he is 63 that speaks volumes to me as to his personality, of course if you are looking for someone who will out live you I guess you fish in that pond. If he is looking for someone that can "keep up" with him and assumes anyone his age can't he is mistaken.


----------



## catspjamas

Laura Zone 5 said:


> Everyone has deal breakers.
> 
> For some it's smoking.
> Things like "kissing an ashtray, disgusting, smelly, etc' are the words used to describe a smoker.
> 
> For some it's drinking.
> Things like "smells like a brewery, lack of self control, addicted' are words used to describe someone who 'casually' drinks.
> 
> Everyone has deal breakers.
> 
> Dang.
> I'm not heavy.
> I'm not "too" ugly...
> But I'm old and smoke.:yuck:
> Crap.
> 
> I APPRECIATE the up front honesty.


So you're alone because you are an old smoker.


----------



## Laura Zone 5

catspjamas said:


> Would it be honest if I said a smoker or a drinker were alone because of the smoking or drinking?
> 
> Had he just stated I prefer women that are fit, or height/weight porpotionate


Yes.....if they are on a dating site, and list those two characteristics, and all those searching for a mate have chosen drinking and smoking as deal breakers....yes. 
That is a fair and honest statement.

Agree, saying 'fit, in shape, physically active, etc' is the PC way of saying 'not fat'.....but it means the same thing.
It sounds A LOT less harsh, but at the end of the day, either way you say it, the meaning is the same.

IE:
I prefer someone who doesn't taste like a disgusting ashtray, or smells like a bowling alley bathroom....
Has the same meaning (to some) as:
I prefer someone who does not smoke, or drink, ever.

Just different word choices for the same meaning....


----------



## catspjamas

No, I submitted my post before I was done, so I edited it. It's not that he's not attracted to fat people. I could care less. It's stating fat people are alone because they're fat. It's like me stating you're alone because you're old and smoke. Which isn't true and has nothing to do with why you aren't attracted to a particular trait.


----------



## rkintn

I like honesty. I actually think you can be honest without being hurtful and nasty about it. I've seen a couple of people on here before claiming " honesty" about stuff and it seemed as though they used honesty as a justification for their rudeness. 

As for deal breakers, we all have them. Mine have changed over the years and I have found that as I look within myself and see my own flaws, it makes me able to accept others, flaws and all.


----------



## Laura Zone 5

catspjamas said:


> No, I submitted my post before I was done, so I edited it. It's not that he's not attracted to fat people. I could care less. *It's stating fat people are alone because they're fat*. It's like me stating you're alone because you're old and smoke. Which isn't true and has nothing to do with why you aren't attracted to a particular trait.


Ok, didn't catch that.
I know a lot of not fat folks that are alone because of other 'deal breakers'...
I see what you are saying.
Blanket statements are never accurate!


----------



## CountryWannabe

elkhound said:


> i am fat...and not to good looking either...but i sure am sexy as all get out.
> 
> plump,chubby,fat,big boned people rock in my world.....lol


I bet there isn't a lady in here that doesn't covet your plump, sexy self. You are always so supportive, friendly and funny. Who wouldn't find you all that and a hot fudge sundae?

Mary


----------



## cindy71

I just don't want one who lives with his mother or smokes. Some weight like love handles are ok.


----------



## cindy71

AND a job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## farmgal

It wasnt good he said that fat people are alone because they are fat. Thats not good deductive logic. Doesnt make sense. 

As for Farmers only, everyone was too far away. I also think that most of the profiles are old and they dont come on there anymore.


----------



## farmerj

so now we have to be chivalrous, romantic, full figured employed and financially stable....

I sense a life of a hermit might be easier.


----------



## viggie

farmerj said:


> so now we have to be chivalrous, romantic, full figured employed and financially stable....
> 
> I sense a life of a hermit might be easier.


Welll...chivalrous just means courteous. So Pretty sure those simply fall under being an adult and being in a relationship, for either gender.


----------



## farmerj

viggie said:


> Welll...chivalrous just means courteous.


I doubt that....

Some here think it means you have to do things you are totally uncomfortable doing.


----------



## viggie

farmerj said:


> I doubt that....
> 
> Some here think it means you have to do things you are totally uncomfortable doing.


I...uhhhhh....yeah, I don't want to know


----------



## farmerj

viggie said:


> I...uhhhhh....yeah, I don't want to know


http://www.homesteadingtoday.com/specialty-forums/general-chat/498788-chivalry-dead-seems-rant.html


----------



## catspjamas

farmerj said:


> I doubt that....
> 
> Some here think it means you have to do things you are totally uncomfortable doing.


  Like what? Holding the door open? Pulling out her chair? Maybe it's just me, but I like those old fashioned courtesies, from the man I'm in a relationship with.

My brother and his xgf had a discussion about being chivalrous. She stated he was to pretend she had no arms. So, he reached over and cut up her meat. She was not amused. But I think it was pretty dang funny.


----------



## littlejoe

catspjamas said:


> She stated he was to pretend she had no arms. So, he reached over and cut up her meat. She was not amused. But I think it was pretty dang funny.


Some chick wants to play games like that, I would leave at the table!!! She's useless in the biggest sense of the word!

I go to the nursing home to see my mother, often at mealtimes. I help her and others cut up their food.

And as I get up, I might just dump the whole table in her lap!


----------



## RubyRed

Expectations can be a double edged sword, which is when deal breakers come into play. I know how I like to be treated, talked to, and so forth. No way will I ever place myself in demanding it! Either the other person treats me the way it comes natural to them, and if it makes me feel good then great! If not, then I say...next! No harm, no foul. And, that should go the other way around too. Just move on. 

I don't care for heights, so I try the best I can, not to climb any high horse.


----------



## littlejoe

And since she has no arms or a brain, she can simply absorb her food through her skin!

That really hit a wrong spot with me cats!

Chivalry isn't being stupid, or playing stupid games so you get a little later.


----------



## FarmboyBill

ITS NOT?????????????????????????? Im not sure that's right LOL


----------



## farmerj

we have a couple we are friends with. He can walk by the fridge and the stove with food on it and just go sit at the table. The expectation is, she will bring him his meal and such and that's just how it is. And it's agreeable on both sides.

My wife and I, we do things for the other and if either of us are in the kitchen, ask if the other wants anything. It's just how we are.

Each couple and each person in that relationship has their expectations. I can't tell them they are wrong for the way they live and they don't tell us we are wrong. We just leave it be regardless of individual feelings on the matter.

Some here would be totally aghast at how they talk to each other. But to them, it works.

If you get into a relationship and something doesn't sit right with you, either talk about it or be done with it. The only time someone should dare interfere with with something like that is if there is a true danger of injury or death, on the part of EITHER party.


----------



## Malamute

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chivalry

Gentlemanly may be more what people were thinking instead of chivalrous. Gentlemanly is more along the lines of doors, etc, chivalry I believe is more along the lines of standing up for someone, (or even jumping up to their defense with sword or pistol in hand). If the example of the Westgate Mall incident in Kenya could be used, those civilians that ran towards the gunfire with their own pistols, and managed to get hundreds of innocents out, were the real definition of chivalrous. Those men that ran away and saved themselves without helping anyone, well, they are in a different class.

I'm good with doors, chairs, coats and that sort of thing, in its place, but when out tooling around in the hills or that sort of thing, I don't tend to so much. It's at those times many men like to feel their companion isn't completely helpless. It's almost a reverse code in the west that whoever isn't driving gets out and opens and closes gates out in the hills. Most western women have no problem with that, even when they enjoy the town-ish parts of doors being opened for them etc.


----------



## catspjamas

littlejoe said:


> And since she has no arms or a brain, she can simply absorb her food through her skin!
> 
> That really hit a wrong spot with me cats!
> 
> Chivalry isn't being stupid, or playing stupid games so you get a little later.


Sorry. I don't remember what it was that started their whole conversation, but apparently she thought my brother wasn't chivalrous enough. I still think his response to what she said was funny, because it was a stupid comment.


----------



## catspjamas

Malamute said:


> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chivalry
> 
> It's almost a reverse code in the west that whoever isn't driving gets out and opens and closes gates out in the hills. Most western women have no problem with that, even when they enjoy the town-ish parts of doors being opened for them etc.


That's not just a west thing. I was raised in the city, and have only lived in NC & TN, but I never had to be told to get out and open a gate, when someone else was driving.


----------



## RubyRed

Malamute said:


> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chivalry
> 
> Gentlemanly may be more what people were thinking instead of chivalrous. Gentlemanly is more along the lines of doors, etc, chivalry I believe is more along the lines of standing up for someone, (or even jumping up to their defense with sword or pistol in hand). If the example of the Westgate Mall incident in Kenya could be used, those civilians that ran towards the gunfire with their own pistols, and managed to get hundreds of innocents out, were the real definition of chivalrous. Those men that ran away and saved themselves without helping anyone, well, they are in a different class.
> 
> I'm good with doors, chairs, coats and that sort of thing, in its place, but when out tooling around in the hills or that sort of thing, I don't tend to so much. It's at those times many men like to feel their companion isn't completely helpless. It's almost a reverse code in the west that whoever isn't driving gets out and opens and closes gates out in the hills. Most western women have no problem with that, even when they enjoy the town-ish parts of doors being opened for them etc.


Very well said! My trapping partner, (my ex) was astounded that I anxiously jumped out of the truck to open the gate up so he could drive through without having to put the truck in park and go through the hassle and such. Why wouldn't I? After all, it is the considerate thing to do, part of being a "partner" too. 

Chivalry is not being a coward, it is with honor and self respect.


----------



## Twp.Tom

Sounds like you were a great co-pilot:buds:


----------



## casusbelli

Hi, again, I'm back (like a poltergeist). I took yesterday off from the internet to make crock-pot rabbit stew (and de-bone rabbits and make homemade dogfood, etc) for my 'family': my son, a daughter, ex-wife, and ex-mother-in-law. (I'm such a black-hearted man!) Sent them home with leftovers, food for their dog, and fresh brown eggs for the mother (again). 
RubyRed and Laura Zone 5: Thanks! You took my comments in the way I intended. But in hindsight, I was more abrasive than I should have been, and probably didn't deserve your defense. And Ruby: you have a good memory...wasn't the kilt contest 5 years ago???
And I did mis-speak (or write) day before yest: most of you are NOT phonies. HT folk are the cream of the crop, and when I write about unsustainability, gluttony, or hard work, I am preaching to the choir. 
For the one poster here who is incensed that I wrote for heavy women not to bellyache if they're single, I in no way meant to imply that all heavy folks are single because of said heaviness. The sentence didn't say that. (But this is the same person who put words into my mouth: "losers" to be specific, which I never used, and do not believe.) Heavy singles may be single because of halitosis, or bad personality, or extreme shyness, or whatever. I may be still single because I'm 52, or arrogant, or not laid-back enough, or because some higher power doesn't want me to be. Who knows?
But to the same person I will ask this. So....no one IS single because they're overweight? No one is single (against their wishes) because they're ugly? Because of their age? Because any feature or attribute out of their control?!!! LOL!!! We're not living in an Eden! The world's unfair, and yes, all of us who are without partners against our wishes are so for a reason! Only the deluded think they're perfect, nobody else sees their faults, and by George, they just "haven't met the right person yet"!!! My goodness......


----------



## Fowler

I am single because prince charming and his tractor lost my address, and I also stopped looking and became a hermit.


----------



## Terri

Well, my husband is not single because he is overweight! LOL!

Since this is primarily a site for singles, I expect there is a wide assortment of reasons why they are single. Including the death of a spouse. 

No matter! I know that after the death of my FIL that my MIL had offers but she turned them down: after 2 husbands and having raised 3 children, she just decided that she would do something else. Her life and her business!


----------



## Fowler

casusbelli said:


> Hi, again, I'm back (like a poltergeist). I took yesterday off from the internet to make crock-pot rabbit stew (and de-bone rabbits and make homemade dogfood, etc) for my 'family': my son, a daughter, ex-wife, and ex-mother-in-law. (I'm such a black-hearted man!) Sent them home with leftovers, food for their dog, and fresh brown eggs for the mother (again).
> RubyRed and Laura Zone 5: Thanks! You took my comments in the way I intended. But in hindsight, I was more abrasive than I should have been, and probably didn't deserve your defense. And Ruby: you have a good memory...wasn't the kilt contest 5 years ago???
> And I did mis-speak (or write) day before yest: most of you are NOT phonies. HT folk are the cream of the crop, and when I write about unsustainability, gluttony, or hard work, I am preaching to the choir.
> For the one poster here who is incensed that I wrote for heavy women not to bellyache if they're single, I in no way meant to imply that all heavy folks are single because of said heaviness. The sentence didn't say that. (But this is the same person who put words into my mouth: "losers" to be specific, which I never used, and do not believe.) Heavy singles may be single because of halitosis, or bad personality, or extreme shyness, or whatever. I may be still single because I'm 52, or arrogant, or not laid-back enough, or because some higher power doesn't want me to be. Who knows?
> But to the same person I will ask this. So....no one IS single because they're overweight? No one is single (against their wishes) because they're ugly? Because of their age? Because any feature or attribute out of their control?!!! LOL!!! We're not living in an Eden! The world's unfair, and yes, all of us who are without partners against our wishes are so for a reason! Only the deluded think they're perfect, nobody else sees their faults, and by George, they just "haven't met the right person yet"!!! My goodness......


 
I have an idea....show us your faults  where's your ST pic?


----------



## elkhound

just had a thought....best thing about a fat guy is he always has dry fire tender in his belly button.....roflmao



sometimes i crack myself up...lol....and blow kool aid out my nose i laugh so hard.


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## casusbelli

OK, Fowler, here's my pic:


now you know why i'm alone....


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## catspjamas

casusbelli said:


> Hi, again, I'm back (like a poltergeist). I took yesterday off from the internet to make crock-pot rabbit stew (and de-bone rabbits and make homemade dogfood, etc) for my 'family': my son, a daughter, ex-wife, and ex-mother-in-law. (I'm such a black-hearted man!) Sent them home with leftovers, food for their dog, and fresh brown eggs for the mother (again).
> RubyRed and Laura Zone 5: Thanks! You took my comments in the way I intended. But in hindsight, I was more abrasive than I should have been, and probably didn't deserve your defense. And Ruby: you have a good memory...wasn't the kilt contest 5 years ago???
> And I did mis-speak (or write) day before yest: most of you are NOT phonies. HT folk are the cream of the crop, and when I write about unsustainability, gluttony, or hard work, I am preaching to the choir.
> For the one poster here who is incensed that I wrote for heavy women not to bellyache if they're single, I in no way meant to imply that all heavy folks are single because of said heaviness. The sentence didn't say that. (But this is the same person who put words into my mouth: "losers" to be specific, which I never used, and do not believe.) Heavy singles may be single because of halitosis, or bad personality, or extreme shyness, or whatever. I may be still single because I'm 52, or arrogant, or not laid-back enough, or because some higher power doesn't want me to be. Who knows?
> But to the same person I will ask this. So....no one IS single because they're overweight? No one is single (against their wishes) because they're ugly? Because of their age? Because any feature or attribute out of their control?!!! LOL!!! We're not living in an Eden! The world's unfair, and yes, all of us who are without partners against our wishes are so for a reason! Only the deluded think they're perfect, nobody else sees their faults, and by George, they just "haven't met the right person yet"!!! My goodness......


You can try and twist "heavy women shouldn't bellyache for being alone", but there's no way around it. You were stating that fat women are alone because they're fat. And no, I don't believe anyone is single because of their weight, height, looks, age, or whatever, unless they let that be the factor why they are alone. People put up walls all the time, and some use weight as a wall to keep people away. The walls that people construct keep them single, not what they use for the wall. 

I never said you said people were losers, that's you putting words in my mouth. Go read my post #44. I said your ATTITUDE is that people are losers and you have a list of what makes them losers. And so far nothing you have written has convinced me any differently.


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## Laura

Casusbelli, your opinion there are no Ruths and Naomis in the slim package you are looking for is a misperception. The problem is you are not a Boaz. These wise and wonderful women steer clear of men like you.


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## casusbelli

Laura, since I haven't attacked anyone here personally, could you avoid doing it too?
We already know I'm off your list. 
No, I'm no Boaz. I strive to be, but don't succeed nearly enough.


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## elkhound




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## Fowler

At least he's honest, just like viggie was in another thread. I appreciate honesty and others reality even if I find it offensive and or I disagree. I"ve learned to respect the big red balls on wipe out!!....and its funny to watch people (including myself) get smacked down when you see it coming....LOL


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## Terri in WV

You may not feel that you have attacked anyone here personally, but several have said that they are on FO, so in a way, yes...

And in one feel swoop you have attacked half(your statistic) of my part of the population and topped it off by adding ugly and old. Then you get your knickers twisted because folks are responding with honesty about attitude.

So, your truth is okay, but others truth isn't? Got it...


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## casusbelli

Other's truth IS okay. But "These wise and wonderful women steer clear of men like you " doesn't qualify for established truth, does it??? Now, if you want to argue the % of American women who are overweight, or discern 'elevated BMI' from 'morbidly obese', then we'd be talking about truth, in the common sense of the word. 
But it's no concern of mine whether one fell swoop includes a tiny fraction, or a huge portion of those who are reading; not my problem....


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## Terri in WV

casusbelli said:


> But "These wise and wonderful women steer clear of men like you " doesn't qualify for established truth, does it???


Actually, from what I've been reading here, it pretty much does. :happy2:


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## Laura

casusbelli said:


> Laura, since I haven't attacked anyone here personally, could you avoid doing it too?
> We already know I'm off your list.
> No, I'm no Boaz. I strive to be, but don't succeed nearly enough.


 Not an attack, simply a statement.

We want what we want and what we're attracted to. A man whose #1 is The Body cannot hide this. It's not appealing to fit, healthy middle-aged women. Let me be more blunt. It's a total turn-off they way these men look at us and what blurts out of their mouths. The biggest turn-off is the invisible nonperson status bestowed upon others based on their bodies.

Do remember physically fit, anatomically correct, healthy, smart, capable women can darn near have any man she wants. We want what we want, but we need to strive to be what they want, too. Washboard abs don't trump sucky disposition.


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## elkhound




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## casusbelli

This is profitless, so I'm going to take Mark Twain's advice about arguing, and abandon this thread. 
I'll beat you to it:
"Hooray!"


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## Terri

Folks a couple of years ago I was asked to give warning when a thread was in danger of being put under mod review. Well, this thread is at risk of violating "be nice". 

Everybody has had their say. Nobody is going to change their minds. So, how about we give the subject of weight a rest? 

Farmersonly sounds like a tempting site to homesteading women, and it is a shame that it is apparently a not very active site. Personally I married a city boy, but it would be pretty cool to date somebody who spoke my language! DH is perfectly happy to talk about vegetables and eggs and such, but more about the cooking of them than the growing of them!


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## Terri

casusbelli said:


> This is profitless, so I'm going to take Mark Twain's advice about arguing, and abandon this thread.
> I'll beat you to it:
> "Hooray!"


Yep. Beat me by 60 seconds!:hobbyhors


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## Fowler

But...But...I was just about give him a purple nurple...then twist him into a pretzel and make him scream "fat bottom gurls make the rockin world go round"....LOL!!! I just cracked myself up


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## Laura

It's true, Fowler. Observing the happy couples in my region, they are made with happy people. The juicy plump plums are happy satisfied women with happy, easygoing men. It's all in their attitudes of appreciation.


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## elkhound

food for thought....since there seems to be more fat people....does that mean i have better chance at sex?


i may head to town to grocery store and do a test...get a cart and fill it with oreos and see if i can get a plump lady to ride my shopping cart...if we are lucky i will crash on the milk isle....cleanup on isle 3....roflmao

i wonder if i could get push that with both of us on there like a skate board....naw the wheels never hold us both....lol

wheres my hardhat i am going to town.


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## shanzone2001

casusbelli said:


> On Farmersonly, the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old. Or they smoke. Those lucky few who have none of these negatives, however, possess acreage, horses, and....are not willing to relocate. (There are no Naomi's and Ruth's anymore.)
> 
> Yes, I'll make enemies writing this. I don't care anymore. The truth always hurts....


Yes, the truth can hurt and I do agree with your conclusion to an extent, however, I would have implied "some" not "most" of the women are too heavy, too ugly or too old.
You see, what one man may find unattractive, another man may find to be beautiful. What one man may find to be too old may be just the perfect age for someone else. :thumb:

Perhaps a woman who owns her own land and animals may be a good thing...that is if you are looking for a confident, financially stable woman. Moving does go both ways!!!


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## shanzone2001

Does being overweight affect one's ability to find a mate? Perhaps indirectly....let me explain. When a woman does not feel like she is attractive, it absolutely affects her self-confidence. I do not know many overweight women who truly enjoy being overweight. I have gained weight at different points of my life and felt horrible because I did not look my best. When I didn't feel good about the way I looked, I was less confident in myself thus less attractive to men.
Everyone seems to be jumping on casusbelli for making an valid observation.


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## Terri

Twisting people into pretzels is "not nice", according to the book "everything I need to know I learned in kindergarten".


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## Fowler

I just had my 3 grandsons over for the weekend, age 2. 5 and 6.... is it any wonder why I am this way?......LOL


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## shanzone2001

Put her in time out!!!! Please!!!!! Lol
:catfight:


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## Fowler

shanzone2001 said:


> Does being overweight affect one's ability to find a mate? Perhaps indirectly....let me explain. When a woman does not feel like she is attractive, it absolutely affects her self-confidence. I do not know many overweight women who truly enjoy being overweight. I have gained weight at different points of my life and felt horrible because I did not look my best. When I didn't feel good about the way I looked, I was less confident in myself thus less attractive to men.
> Everyone seems to be jumping on casusbelli for making an valid observation.


Fatty Fatty 2x4......sorry I couldnt resist, grandsons are a bad influence on me...or maybe I am on them....LOL


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## shanzone2001

Fowler said:


> Fatty Fatty 2x4......sorry I couldnt resist, grandsons are a bad influence on me...or maybe I am on them....LOL


I just laughed out loud. You are so *not* PC!!!

I know you are but what am I???? (I can play the kid game, too!)


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## horselogger

casusbelli said:


> Like I said, i don't care who thinks what about me. It's true, no matter how offended any of you get: in the 1940's one American woman out of 20 was obese. Today it's closer to 50%. So they shouldn't belly ache that they're single. It's a real turn-off for many guys (a few like it). And guys can't 'fake it'....
> I take care of myself, and expect any partner to. If I don't find anyone that fits my expectations, I'll stay single. Their loss.....


how old are you?


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## shanzone2001

What does age have to do with it? If he doesn't like overweight women then he doesn't like overweight women. It is his personal preference....just like I prefer handsome men with facial hair. Why is that wrong???


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## elkhound

Fowler said:


> Fatty Fatty 2x4......sorry I couldnt resist, grandsons are a bad influence on me...or maybe I am on them....LOL



i just snorted so hard while laughing it hurt...you will hear from my lawyer next week.....their famous..johnson,johnson and bloomer....a subsidiary of toys r us....:gaptooth:


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## shanzone2001

Their famous what???? Bwahahahaha!!!


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## Fowler

shanzone2001 said:


> I just laughed out loud. You are so *not* PC!!!
> 
> I know you are but what am I???? (I can play the kid game, too!)


I am rubber, you are glue, what bounces off me sticks to you!!!...LOL!!!!:catfight:


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## roadless

yep...men with facial hair..


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## elkhound

Fowler said:


> I am rubber, you are glue, what bounces off me sticks to you!!!...LOL!!!!:catfight:


this wont bounce off...lol





[YOUTUBE]WxgBXJM6zJ8[/YOUTUBE]


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## shanzone2001

You folks are weird!!!! You should have your own dating site....weirdosonly.com


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## Terri in WV

And you fit right in with us Shan! (well, except for the married part )


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## elkhound

shanzone2001 said:


> You folks are weird!!!! You should have your own dating site....weirdosonly.com



and who lives on the left side again....lol


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## shanzone2001

Terri in WV said:


> And you fit right in with us Shan! (well, except for the married part )


Who me??? I am totally normal!!! :kiss:


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## Fowler

A friend sent this to me, I LOVE IT!!!!

[youtube]R4EdMNToZTo[/youtube]


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## Fowler

shanzone2001 said:


> Who me??? I am totally normal!!! :kiss:


 
Whatever rincess:


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## elkhound

that is so hilarious...lol


i laughed so hard my bellybutton collapsed shut.


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## Terri in WV

shanzone2001 said:


> You folks are weird!!!!


Takes one to know one..


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## elkhound

Terri in WV said:


> Takes one to know one..




roflmao


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## Fowler

elkhound said:


> that is so hilarious...lol
> 
> 
> i laughed so hard my bellybutton collapsed shut.


 
ROTF!!!! I miss being young and pulling paper wads out of my hair


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## shanzone2001

Is that a reference to being fat? Are we talking about fat people again???


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## Fowler

shanzone2001 said:


> Is that a reference to being fat? Are we talking about fat people again???


Why are you creating draaama doo doo head....LOL


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## shanzone2001

Say the word correctly....I can't understand what you are trying to say!!!

If you can't say anything nice, come sit by me....and bring a few beers!!! rincess:


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## elkhound

Fowler said:


> ROTF!!!! I miss being young and pulling paper wads out of my hair



i will trade you one indian burn for ah lets say you can pull a handful of back hair out and you can have the rest of my apple i had for lunch and 3 tootsie rolls.


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## Fowler

shanzone2001 said:


> Say the word correctly....I can't understand what you are trying to say!!!
> 
> If you can't say anything nice, come sit by me....and bring a few beers!!! rincess:


 
You know typing G rated...is fun!! But I dont think drinking beer is consider G rated. So quit being a bad influence, I am very impressionable.....LOL!!!!


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## elkhound

wanna ride....lol


[YOUTUBE]ygcConBiLV8[/YOUTUBE]


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## shanzone2001

Whatever!!! Go eat a doughnut or some of Elk's tootsie rolls!!!!


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## elkhound

shanzone2001 said:


> Whatever!!! Go eat a doughnut or some of Elk's tootsie rolls!!!!


hey if you keep giving her food i cant make any good trades with her.

i am trying to get her to play evil knievel with me.....:viking:


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## Fowler

shanzone2001 said:


> Whatever!!! Go eat a doughnut or some of Elk's tootsie rolls!!!!


You dont have to share your leftovers, I know you like me......LOL:nannereanut butter jelly time!!!


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## elkhound

if fowler backs out of jumping cows in the barn lot its me and you shan...we are doing the winter olympics down the sliding board on skis ...blind folded...swishhhhhhhh


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## RubyRed

casusbelli said:


> RubyRed and Laura Zone 5: Thanks! You took my comments in the way I intended. But in hindsight, I was more abrasive than I should have been, and probably didn't deserve your defense. And Ruby: you have a good memory...wasn't the kilt contest 5 years ago???


Yes, that's right, it was the kilt contest! I was a lurker back in those days...that was fun watching all of the ouuulalala's and hubba hubba's! Human behavior is so interesting to watch.


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## Terri in WV

Wait! You're supposed to be young to pull paper wads out of your hair? 

I guess that means I'm still young. :dance:


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## Laura Zone 5

RubyRed said:


> Yes, that's right, it was the kilt contest! I was a lurker back in those days...that was fun watching all of the ouuulalala's and hubba hubba's! Human behavior is so interesting to watch.


Get out.....Kilt contest??
Is there a link??:shocked:


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## RubyRed

Laura Zone 5 said:


> Get out.....Kilt contest??
> Is there a link??:shocked:


Gosh, I am not for sure, LauraZ5. Perhaps casusbelli could "jog" the memory of others, or enlighten the newbies since then, in the name of research, of course... 

Waddya say, Cas?


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## rkintn

The thread with the kilt contest was so long ago, I think it's been pruned.


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## Kiamichi Kid

shanzone2001 said:


> Does being overweight affect one's ability to find a mate? Perhaps indirectly....let me explain. When a woman does not feel like she is attractive, it absolutely affects her self-confidence. I do not know many overweight women who truly enjoy being overweight. I have gained weight at different points of my life and felt horrible because I did not look my best. When I didn't feel good about the way I looked, I was less confident in myself thus less attractive to men.
> Everyone seems to be jumping on casusbelli for making an valid observation.


You've always been beautiful.... at least as long as I've known you.


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## shanzone2001

Thank you for the compliment. You are such a kind gentleman, JD!!!


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