# my daughter is gone



## chewie (Jun 9, 2008)

all the worries I had about her moving out and away are over.
my baby cheyenne, one month shy of her 18th bday, passed away on the 6th. we do not know why, tests are being run.
I hurt so bad I cannot breathe. my kids are everything adn now she's gone. all my faith is shaken, how can I believe any of it? how can a loving God take her from me? this isn't love. 

on the day I should've been altering her prom dress I was picking a casket. on the day of her prom, we buried her. 
I see no way out of this hole. I cannot see how to finish raising the younger one. what kind of wife can i be. I was to protect her and she's gone. and nobody can tell me why. she came home that day just fine. passed in the night, it looks instant. what kind of god does that? what kind of god burns pain into my souL??


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## elkhound (May 30, 2006)

i am so sorry for your pain and loss....i have no answers either....i will pray for peace and understanding for you and family and friends.


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## Maura (Jun 6, 2004)

Oh, the tears!

I am so sorry.


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## dawnpacz (May 1, 2005)

I am so very sorry for your loss.


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## samm (Dec 6, 2008)

So very sorry I don't know the words to say to make it better...prayer is what I have to offer...so I will lift you and your family up I prayer 

Samm


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## vicki in NW OH (May 10, 2002)

I am so sorry.


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## Terri (May 10, 2002)

Oh, Chewie, I am so very sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!


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## bluesky (Mar 22, 2008)

I'm terribly sorry for your loss and your terrible pain. I can't begin to imagine.


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## Melissa (Apr 15, 2002)

I am so sorry. So young and to not know what caused it has to be even more devastating. I can't even begin to say that I know what you are going through, I do know we have parents here who have lost a child and I hope they post and have some words to share with you.


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## Jokarva (Jan 17, 2010)

I'm so, so sorry. Will keep your family in my prayers, and I hope you get answers on how this happened.


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## Hisgoodgirl (Mar 31, 2010)

I am so sorry.


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## bama (Aug 21, 2011)

i am so sorry.


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## mamita (May 19, 2008)

oh my darling, I am so sorry for your loss! I have no words. my heart just breaks for you and your family. I just am so sad for you.


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## pattycake (May 16, 2010)

There are no words to comfort you. I wish we could all help you shoulder this burden of pain. I am so deeply shocked and so very sorry.


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## willow_girl (Dec 7, 2002)

My deepest condolences. So sorry for your loss...


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## mistletoad (Apr 17, 2003)

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## PrettyPaisley (May 18, 2007)

I am so very sorry for your loss.


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## mamita (May 19, 2008)

prayers said for comfort. more prayers than you can imagine. please uplift this family with much love and peace.


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## Mickey (Aug 28, 2002)

I'm so very very sorry chewie. My heart is aching for you and the rest of your family. I just can't imagine the horror of what you're going thru, but please know that all of your HT family is here for you to help in any way that we can.


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## anette (Jun 20, 2008)

no answers, no advice.... just wishing you peace and comfort in this unbelievably sad time.

anette


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## ginnie5 (Jul 15, 2003)

no words......just prayers being said.


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## cindy-e (Feb 14, 2008)

I am so, so sorry for your loss!

Cindyc.


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## sidepasser (May 10, 2002)

I can't imagine what you are going through, I pray that you will find the reason why your dear daughter passed away unexpectedly. I sincerely pray that you will find peace and comfort during your darkest nights and guidance in the days when you most need it, my sincerest sympathy goes out to you in your time of need.


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## GeorgiaLady (Jul 18, 2012)

I am sorry for your loss.


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## unregistered41671 (Dec 29, 2009)

I am so sorry.


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## Tiempo (May 22, 2008)

Oh Chewie, I can't express how sorry I am, how my heart aches for you.


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## KentuckyDreamer (Jan 20, 2012)

(((Chewie)))

I am so sorry.


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## homefire2007 (Sep 21, 2007)

I am so sorry for your loss and the horrible pain you are in. As a mother, I can't begin to imagine what you must feel. All I can do is send you my prayers. You will go on, you have a younger child that is looking to you for comfort and strength.


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## Rainy (Jan 21, 2010)

I am so very sorry.. You will be in my prayers and thoughts each and every day...


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## AR Cattails (Dec 22, 2005)

I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.


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## Shygal (May 26, 2003)

Oh my goodness  What a shock!
I cant even imagine, I dont have any words, that is my greatest fear


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## 7thswan (Nov 18, 2008)

I am so sorry. You will be in my thoughs and Prayers.


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## farmgal (Nov 12, 2005)

This is just awful, I am so sorry. We are all feeling your pain. My deepest condolences, chewie.


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## Rosepath (Feb 18, 2011)

Lifting you and your family up in prayer for strength, comfort, answers. So very very sorry to hear of losing your little girl.


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## farmersonja (Mar 9, 2013)

There are no words, I am so very sorry.:Bawling:


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## Teri (Jan 13, 2003)

So very sorry. I am praying for you.


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## CocalicoSprings (Mar 12, 2008)

I cannot think of the words to say but I feel so very bad for you. I hope God will help you.


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## Kelly (Mar 5, 2008)

I've sat here with a blank screen trying to think of something to say to ease your pain....I can't think of anything. Wish you were closer so I could give you a hug. I just can't imagine the pain. Please know I'm praying for you and your family. I am so very sorry to hear about Cheyenne. (((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))


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## farmhome5 (Dec 20, 2005)

I am so sorry.


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## Guest (Apr 15, 2013)

I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved child. Many are prayers being said...


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## clovis (May 13, 2002)

I am so sorry for your loss...I really am. I wish that I had words of comfort for you.


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## mare (Aug 31, 2006)

how awful, may you find some peace with your memories


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## strawberrygirl (Feb 11, 2009)

I am deeply sorry for your loss. I know there are no words that can bring you any sort of comfort, but know that I am praying for you and your family.


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## Molly Mckee (Jul 8, 2006)

I'm so very sorry. We lost a grandson two years ago, counciling helped our DD and SIL cope, but it is still hard. We will keep you in our prayers.


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## tnokie (Jan 30, 2007)

What a horrible sad thing to go thru. My deepest sympathy and prayers for God to show you how and why.


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## SunsetSonata (Nov 23, 2006)

So very, very sorry you and your family are experiencing this horrific loss.


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## Queen Bee (Apr 7, 2004)

May you find peace and understanding... Hugs and I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved daughter..


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## salmonslayer (Jan 4, 2009)

Chewie, no words can express what we all mean and probably none can console you at this time but we are all here for you...reach out if you need to and we will be there. Ive never been much for churching but you have my prayers.


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## lordoftheweeds (Dec 27, 2012)

I can't imagine how you feel. and there is nothing that can be said to lessen the pain. I really don't know what to say...


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## Guest (Apr 15, 2013)

Wow...I cant imagine the pain & shock you and your family are going through. I will say a prayer for you and yours..HUGS...


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## Pearl B (Sep 27, 2008)

Im so sorry. There truly are no words.


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## jennytw (Aug 7, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. There can be nothing worse. I pray that you will get some answers in all areas of this sad time.


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## AngieM2 (May 10, 2002)

I am so sorry for your loss.

I have no words that are adequate.

Please accept this cyber hug :grouphug: I hope there is someone there to hold you and let you cry at least a little of the bewilderment and deep pain out.


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## GeorgiaGirl (Jun 1, 2009)

remembering you in prayer~


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## mekasmom (Jan 19, 2010)

I am so very sorry.


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## Alice In TX/MO (May 10, 2002)

I am so sorry. All I can do is pray that you find answers and peace.

Huggs,
Alice


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## LearningLife (Aug 11, 2010)

I'm so very sorry.


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## Liberty'sGirl (Jul 7, 2012)

What a shock and loss! Wish there were answers to your questions, but for now, there are none. There is nothing that is perfect to say. Again, I am so sorry.


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## HOTW (Jul 3, 2007)

Words cannot express but know I grieve with thee, I know your pain.


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## randysdad (Mar 30, 2013)

What can be said? I don't know... I just hope you someday get the answers and peace you need.


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## Lisa in WA (Oct 11, 2004)

There are no words. My heart is breaking for you.


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## acabin42 (May 11, 2002)

Chewie, where to start.... I lost my son on January 5th of this year. I had the news ahead of time that he was terminal. It did not ease the pain....however I have a very strong faith in The Lord as did my son. He died from colon cancer and as the end was nearing I was so sure that I would never live through his death. But I did, and I have peace in my heart because I believe that I will see him again. He was in so much pain that I wouldn't wish that on him again. 

I can't speak for you or your daughter. It was sudden and you have no answers. But I believe that everyone had their days numbered and only The Lord knows when our time is up. 

I will pray that you find answers and the peace in your heart to deal with it. I thank The Lord that he gave me the time with my son that he did. I belong to a motorcycle ministry and we organized a cancer ride to raise money for our local cancer house in his memory. He was all about helping others and I feel like I am carrying on his work. 

Please feel free to pm me if you just want to talk.


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## soulsurvivor (Jul 4, 2004)

chewie, I'm so sorry for the loss of your daughter Cheyenne and pray that you and your family can find comfort in your shared grief.


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## dndweeks (Jan 17, 2013)

I am so, so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately, I know a bit of what you're going thru having lost my 21-year-old son in 2010. It is a pain that no parent should have to experience. 

My thoughts are with you as you grieve your precious daughter.


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## Mme_Pickles (Nov 15, 2011)

My deepest and most sincere condolences.... I cannot even begin to imagine. Many tears shed on your behalf. Many and numerous prayers lifted for comfort, peace, understanding, whatever is needed for your family. I am so very sorry....


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## Woodpecker (Mar 8, 2007)

So very sorry for your loss, praying for you and yours.


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## Texasgirl (Sep 13, 2005)

I'm so sorry for your loss. 
Praying for you and your family.


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## ||Downhome|| (Jan 12, 2009)

My deepest sympathy and I can not Imagine...


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## Jaclynne (May 14, 2002)

I am so sorry for your loss, praying that you will find the peace and comfort to get thru this.


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## Dixie (Dec 10, 2002)

I am so sorry.


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## Danaus29 (Sep 12, 2005)

My heart breaks for you. You and your family have my deepest, most heartfelt sympathy. I am so very sorry for your loss.


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## EarthSheltered (May 9, 2008)

Chewie, I'm so sorry. Stay strong.


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## bridget (May 10, 2002)

So sorry for your loss.


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## tallpines (Apr 9, 2003)

So very sorry ........ I can't begin to fathom your devastation.,,,,,,,,,,


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## BamaNana (Dec 31, 2004)

I'm so sorry for your loss.  You and your family are in my prayers.


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## GrannyG (Mar 26, 2005)

Praying for you and your family.....


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## fellini123 (Feb 2, 2003)

I am so sorry to hear of this. I cannot fathom your loss or the sadness. If there is anything we can do please let us help. (((((((((hugs))))))))))

Alice in Virginia


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## Harry Chickpea (Dec 19, 2008)

So sorry as well. Sometimes angels only need to be around for a short while to do their job.


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## Ravenlost (Jul 20, 2004)

Oh chewie, I am so very sorry. As the mother of a daughter I can not begin to imagine your pain. I wish I could be there to give you a hug and cry with you. My heart truly hurts for you.


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## vicker (Jul 11, 2003)

Sometimes all you can do is cry. I'm so sorry for you all's loss.


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## Big Dave (Feb 5, 2006)

My condolences on your deep loss


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## Jerngen (May 22, 2006)

We are so sorry to hear of your loss  Prayers said for y'all.


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## tiffnzacsmom (Jan 26, 2006)

I am so sorry, your family is in my thoughts.


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## Joshie (Dec 8, 2008)

I am so sorry. Praying.


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## ChristieAcres (Apr 11, 2009)

Chewy, my heart goes out to you losing your precious daughter. I cannot imagine the depth of the pain and tremendous loss. Know there are so many here who are holding you in our virtual arms, wishing we could bring you comfort and ease your pain. Even when the results of the tests come back, losing her at that age will never make sense. May our Lord bring you peace, enable you to find comfort in all the wonderful memories you shared with your daughter, and also the ability to carry on parenting your youngest.


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## cathleenc (Aug 16, 2007)

I am so very very sorry for the loss of your dear daughter Cheyenne. I can't imagine your pain.....


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## DW (May 10, 2002)

(((((hugs)))))


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## ArkansasLady (Jan 1, 2003)

Chewie,
There is nothing worse than burying your child. It is the hardest thing I have ever done. Please know your in my prayers. 
Also please understand that the feelings your are experiencing are normal and the God can handle your questions, your pain, and your anger. 
If you need a ear to listen or a shoulder to cry on, please pm me. 
Your family is in my prayers. 
~Cindy~


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## Dolly (Dec 13, 2003)

I too am sorry. There are no words for this, because it goes too deep for human expression. Please know there are some here who know what you are feeling, because at one time we felt what you feel now. You and your family have my most sincere condolences.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

PM me if I can do anything for you.....
I am so so sorry. I am so sorry.


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## Tirzah (May 19, 2006)

Chewie,

I too am at a loss for words. I cannot even begin to imagine what you are going through. My heart aches for you and your family. Please know that you and your family are in my prayers. I am asking the Lord to bring you comfort, peace and strength. I am so sorry.


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## TriWinkle (Oct 2, 2011)

I am sorry.


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## patty12 (Jan 25, 2011)

I lost my only daughter 10/22/2011, it is really hard but don't blame God. if you believe and she did then you will see her again in a far happier place. we never know why these things happen but they do so pray for the strength to bare the pain.
God loaned her to you for 18 years and now he took her back to his breast, please hang on.


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## Goatsandsheep (Jun 7, 2006)

My deepest sympathy


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## dancingfatcat (Jan 1, 2008)

Sending prayers during this tragic loss. Your children will look to you for strength and comfort...............take them under your wings during this time and lavish unbounding love on them.........just love on them. I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through.........I'm so sorry for you and your families loss. (((((HUGS)))))


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## KrisD (May 26, 2011)

Oh Chewy I'm so sorry! I wish there was something I could do for you. How unbelievably horrible, I can't even imagine what your going through. Hugs my friend. If you need someone to yell at or cry to I'm here for you. You can call me anytime day or night. 360-927-6193

Hugs hon, I hope at the very least you get some answers.


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## montysky (Aug 21, 2006)

I am so sorry, our prayers are with you and your family, God Bless.


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## Billie in MO (Jun 9, 2002)

My deepest sympathies to you and your family. I had to seek counseling after burying 2 children because I still had a child to raise. While not for everyone at some point counseling may be able to help you. I don't wish the road ahead of you to anyone. I am so sorry for your loss.


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## kinwnc (Sep 24, 2005)

*prayers*


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## SageLady (Jun 10, 2008)

Chewie, I am so very sorry for your loss. Words can't express how bad I feel for you. I am praying for you and your family.


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## pistolsmom (Mar 19, 2005)

Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers!


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## Kazahleenah (Nov 3, 2004)

My heart wrenches for you. I'm so sorry for your loss Chewie.


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## Miss Kay (Mar 31, 2012)

I'm so sorry Chewie. What a horrible sad thing to have happen. You are a mother so you must go on. Too many people need you now.


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## Dutchie (Mar 14, 2003)

I am so sorry for your loss


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## TJN66 (Aug 29, 2004)

I'm so sorry.


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## Veronica (Oct 31, 2008)

I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## scwit (Mar 2, 2011)

Oh my how the tears and sorrow are caught up in my throat right now. I can hardly breathe-this brings back such heartbreaking memories for me. I too have lost a child and know how debilitating it can be. I lost my dear father on 10/03 my BIL on 10/13 and my DS on 12/23 the only thing that kept me going was the good Lord and my other 2 children-my youngest was 8 months old at the time. 
My prayers are with you Chewie and you will be on my mind for a long time to come. It will take some time before you come out of this cloud that is hanging over you right now. May the Lord bless you and your family.


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## Txsteader (Aug 22, 2005)

Sending my deepest sympathies for your loss and prayers of strength and peace for you and your family.


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## tojo66 (Apr 9, 2011)

You're all in my prayers.


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## Mid Tn Mama (May 11, 2002)

I too, am sorry for your loss. You will find the strength with your dh and younger child. You must be a role model for the younger one to teach her how to go through really bad times.My prayers.


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## oldmania (Jan 25, 2007)

My heart is breaking for you.


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## BurgerBoy (Mar 31, 2013)

I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## Minelson (Oct 16, 2007)

I am shocked. I am so terribly sad for you. I will write more later. You are on my mind and in my prayers


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## menagerie momma (Sep 29, 2008)

There are no words. I am so sorry, Chewie.


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## BackfourtyMI. (Sep 3, 2007)

I have no answers but know my heart is breaking with yours. I am so deeply sorry for your loss & cannot even imagine the pain your going through. Huggs coming your way & prayers for strength to guide you through this horrible time.


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## myheaven (Apr 14, 2006)

Oh chewie! I am so sorry. The one you are angry at knows your pain. He lost a son. He knows your pain deeply. He hurts as much as you hurt. I wish I could hold you while you cry. I'm so sorry! We all love you and are here for you.


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## Irish Pixie (May 14, 2002)

I am so very sorry for your loss.


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## BlueberryChick (May 12, 2008)

I am so sorry, chewie.


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## CraterCove (Jan 24, 2011)

I have three sons, I can't bear to imagine what losing one would feel like.

I understand the blaming god or rescinding belief because of what happened. However, if one believes in a Christian god then we believe that this life is ephemeral and not made to last. It's the dream and when you wake you are once again home in the arms of Our Father. Don't withhold anything you feel. 

God doesn't put us in situations that we cannot handle, that we cannot find the strength, through him to come out the other side. If you choose to believe in God, you and she will be reunited, she will be waiting for you to welcome you when you get there.

I am so sorry for your loss. Hopefully some answers will give you some measure of peace.


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## Belfrybat (Feb 21, 2003)

I am so sorry your daughter died so young. My thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family as you grieve together and celebrate Cheyenne's life.


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## suzyhomemaker09 (Sep 24, 2004)

Oh I am among the many that are at a loss for words...indeed it is a parent's worst nightmare.


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## Cindy in NY (May 10, 2002)

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## nehimama (Jun 18, 2005)

There are no words that will comfort you at this time, but I am praying that you will find some comfort in the many wonderful memories of your precious daughter.


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## The Tin Mom (Dec 30, 2008)

Oh, I am so sorry.


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## jessimeredith (Sep 12, 2004)

Sending up prayers.


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## Bret (Oct 3, 2003)

I am sorry.

Great One. It is beyond our understanding. Into your waiting arms. Thank you for this life and this daughter and family and their love for each other and those on this trail near and far.


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## TheMartianChick (May 26, 2009)

I am so terribly sorry for your loss, chewie. It is inconceivable that something this tragic and unexplained could happen. I will be praying for you and your family to pull together in the wake of this tragedy and to lean on those that you trust to get you through this. I hope that your family gets some answers that can ease your hearts. Not knowing is definitely the worst thing. Others have said that you should reflect fondly on her life and the good times that you had together...I'd be willing to bet that she would want you to do that, too.


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## Ardie/WI (May 10, 2002)

There are no words that I can say to help you, to ease the pain.

Just know that we are all keeping you close to our hearts.


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## Honey Berry (Oct 22, 2005)

Chewie, I am sorry for the loss of your daughter. I will pray for you and your family.


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## PATRICE IN IL (Mar 25, 2003)

So very sorry for the loss you have suffered.


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## jcatblum (Dec 15, 2009)

So sorry Chewie! So sorry for the loss of you daughter & the pain you and your family are going through.


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## littlequail (Aug 5, 2011)

am so sorry chewie


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## Heidi (Feb 19, 2005)

I have no words...I'm so very sorry, Chewie.


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## MamaTiger (Jun 11, 2008)

My heart hurts for you. I have buried two children and it is, without a doubt, the absolute worst experience you will ever go through. I am sorry you have to walk this lonely road.


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## Kris in MI (May 30, 2002)

Chewie, I am so sorry you are having to experience this. Prayers of strength, comfort, and understanding for you.


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## Gunnie (Apr 28, 2008)

I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers.


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## Elffriend (Mar 2, 2003)

I'm so sorry, Chewie, so very sorry.


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## Annsni (Oct 27, 2006)

Chewie - I am so sorry. You are a wonderful mom and you will get through this although it may be just by barely stepping one foot in front of the other as you carry this burden. My prayers are with you and your family.


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## Strange Bear (May 13, 2002)

I am so sorry.


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## "SPIKE" (Dec 7, 2011)

I am so very sorry. Wish there was something I could do to help ease the pain you must be experiencing.

SPIKE


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## TnMtngirl (Jun 30, 2002)

I am so sorry for your loss,remembering you in prayer.


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## scooter (Mar 31, 2008)

Offering up prayers. I am so sorry.


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## SoINgirl (Aug 3, 2007)

I am very sorry for your loss, praying for you and your family.


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## jbowyer01 (Aug 4, 2008)

Hugs, prayers and healing thoughts sent your way.


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## unregistered65598 (Oct 4, 2010)

Oh dear God, I am so sorry for your loss.


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## mellba (Oct 15, 2004)

I am so sorry.


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## IndyGardenGal (Apr 5, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## Terri in WV (May 10, 2002)

I can't add anything other than to say that I'm so sorry for your family's loss. How tragic a loss that you have to endure and try to overcome. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.


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## TxHorseMom (Feb 21, 2011)

I am so very sorry. I can only imagine the pain you are going through. Prayers for your entire family.


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## lovinthislife (Aug 28, 2009)

I too am so sorry for your loss. I have not had to go through this but my sister did. She lost a son at 7 yrs. old. 

This world is a tragic place. God still loves you and He always has. It may not seem that way right now but He does. When sin entered the world when Eve ate the fruit, terrible things like this were allowed to happen. God does not want you to hurt. It's like when your child is learning to walk, you walk along beside them to catch them when they fall down and get hurt. God is there to help pick you up and console you. 

You are in my prayers. So many are praying for you. You have a terrible row to hoe but you do have another child who needs you to be strong. God bless you honey. sending you a hug


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## Cheryl in SD (Apr 22, 2005)

I am so sorry. I cannot imagine the pain. May you find comfort in teh love of friends and family close to you.


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## Dorothea (May 10, 2004)

i am very sorry


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## Oggie (May 29, 2003)

I'm sorry for your loss.


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## Donna1982 (Jun 14, 2011)

Chewie I am so sorry. If you ever need someone to talk to please PM me.


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## littlequail (Aug 5, 2011)

chewie i don't know you, since i posted this morning i have been thinking about your family, with tears. and this came to me and i feel like i have to tell you this..God also gave his only son. he understands.


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## BoldViolet (Feb 5, 2009)

:: hugs :: I am so sorry.


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## Marsha (May 11, 2002)

Chewie...I am praying for you, and your family during this time of mourning the loss of your precious daughter! I know that God's word is true, and that He will not leave you comfortless during this time. (((HUGS)))

~Marsha


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## Ohio dreamer (Apr 6, 2006)

I'm so sorry to hear this, prayers for comfort and answers to all your questions!.


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## Nancy (May 14, 2002)

No words to say but I am so saddened to hear of this.


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## DaniR1968 (May 24, 2008)

Oh no. How very tragic and to not know why. I'm so very sorry for your loss. I pray for you and your family and that you will have answers soon. It will not bring her back or make her death any easier but will ease some burden on your heart.

I am wrapping my arms around you and holding you. ((()))


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## Bloomer (Apr 2, 2008)

Dear Chewie,

You have my prayers for you and your family as you grieve the loss of your precious daughter.


Bloomer


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## where I want to (Oct 28, 2008)

I'm so sorry - such an awful pain for you to bear.


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## Fair Light (Oct 13, 2010)

I am so very sorry that you are having to go through this...so sorry that you do not know "why"...I pray that God give you peace...just know that she is at rest now...even though the pain is devastating for you and your family..


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## hippygirl (Apr 3, 2010)

I am so very sorry for your loss.

While I know there are no words kind enough or a hug big enough, strong enough, or long enough to ease your pain, please know that you and your family are being raised up in prayer by so many.


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## trulytricia (Oct 11, 2002)

So very sorry for your loss. I know this is like having a hole shot right through your chest. It's hard to move, to think, to listen. But know this, your daughter is allright now.


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## rivenoak (Sep 29, 2009)

chewie, I am so very sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts.


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## pfarms (Feb 3, 2013)

I am very sorry for your what you are going through. It is not easy. Simply put, there are no words that will comfort you, you can only let it out. Knowing what happened will help bring closure, but not make it easier. Only time will do that. The pain is excruciating, I know that. You feel like you are torn apart and living a nightmare that you cant wake up from. Each breath feels like you cant take another. You feel like you have lost everything, so why bother, nothing matters. Your other child does. You have to heal yourself, but understand your other child will need it too. Hug that child and cry together. Soon you just feel angry, at everyone and everything. That is ok. Find a punching bag. Get very cheap old plates from a second hand store and shatter each one. Yell and scream. Just dont direct it at those close to you. 

Your daughter had a beautiful name. She shared that name with my own daughter who past away at the age of 10. It was two years ago this summer. It is a day I will never forget and your story rings so close to my own daughter's. She went to bed fine. We went to get her up in the morning and she was very pale and blue lips. She was rushed to the hospital. She stopped breathing on the way. This is the hardest thing you will ever go through and it will change your life in ways you never expected. Take it one day at a time. Dont hold it in, that will make it worse. I hope you find closure. At my daughters funeral a comment was made that is fitting. Loosing a child makes you part of an exclusive club that you never wanted to be part of. 

Just know you are not alone. You have many people to talk to. Those of us that have lost children know that sometimes you dont want to talk, just cry and know you are not alone. You will be in my prayers. I know that brings little comfort. But in time you will cope. Do not be afraid to see a counselor. Even if you just go and sit in their office and cry, yell, hit pillows.


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## dbarjacres (Feb 2, 2004)

so very sorry.


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## MO_cows (Aug 14, 2010)

Can't even imagine your shock and sense of loss. I'm just so sorry.

Cheyenne's legacy will be one of youth and beauty. She didn't die old, wrinkled, worn out and broken down by this hard earthly world. I hope you can find some comfort in that.


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## missythemom (May 11, 2010)

I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I cannot imagine that pain you and your family must be dealing with right now. I will be praying for peace of mind and spirit for all of you. God bless


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## Nette (Aug 17, 2003)

I'm thinking I remember some beautiful prom pictures that you posted of her last year. I'm so sorry.


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## nduetime (Dec 15, 2005)

Oh dear Lord, what a nightmare. I am so very sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and your family. Honey, you go to a hilltop and do what you have to do, yell, scream, curse, cry, whatever. Do not hold back. Pour it all out to Him and He will take it all. Then you will be able to go on and help your child grieve too. We at HT will be thinking of you all and holding you close to our hearts.


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## AAcre (Mar 2, 2013)

I am so sorry for your loss. I understand how it can shake your faith, but God obviously feels that you and your family are strong enough to carry such a burden. I pray for peace and understanding as well as comfort.


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## Island of Blueb (Sep 20, 2005)

So very sorry. (((chewie)))


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## TedH71 (Jan 19, 2003)

I'm sorry to hear of this happening.


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## lenii (Dec 31, 2005)

there are no words...just a hug...


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## wanda1950 (Jan 18, 2009)

I am so sorry you are suffering such a terrible tragedy. I'm praying for you & your family.


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## halfpint (Jan 24, 2005)

I can't imagine what you are going through, but I'm praying for you.


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## SteveD(TX) (May 14, 2002)

So very sorry for your loss. Prayers for all going up from Texas.


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

She went to sleep in her bed and woke up in God's arms...she must have been an EXCEPTIONAL child.

Mon


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## beccachow (Nov 8, 2008)

I am so very very sorry. I cannot fathom the depth of your heartache. There are no words. I will keep you and yours in my prayers.


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## jassytoo (May 14, 2003)

I am so very sorry. I will pray for your family


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## Cornhusker (Mar 20, 2003)

Sorry for your loss


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## mamahen (May 11, 2002)

You and your family have my deepest sympathy.


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## hmsteader71 (Mar 16, 2006)

Awwww I am so very very sorry. My heart breaks for you.


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## willielisa (Aug 15, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss - I can't imagine what you are going through.


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## OUVickie (Mar 8, 2003)

I am so sorry, Chewie. What a sad turn of events. I can't even imagine the heartbreak you are going through.


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## sandsuncritters (Nov 18, 2011)

Dear Chewie,
No words are adequate. I can only offer tears and hugs and prayers for comfort and healing. 

In His Love
Mich


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## Michael W. Smith (Jun 2, 2002)

chewie,

So sorry. I don't know what you are going through. I hope you and your family can pull together and support each other.

It is not fair that this has happened. God has a plan, and while we might not be able to see the big picture, your daughter was included in it. He does love you. He is there with you. Tell Him what you are feeling - He can take it.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.


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## beaglebiz (Aug 5, 2008)

I am so sorry.


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## BKB HOMESTEAD (Mar 25, 2013)

So sorry for your loss, my prayers are lifting you and your family up. I have never lost a child, but I've lost a grandchild. My biggest obstacle was not being able to "fix it" for my son and his wife. We spend our whole lives protecting them, and when we have no control it's as if someone has tied us up and made us watch them go through pain. I can only tell you that time and prayer helped me get through the loss of my grandchild. People don't know what to say, so many times they don't say anything, but you should know that many people are lifting you up in prayer as you try to find a way to accept the loss of your daughter. You are in my thoughts.


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## Becka03 (Mar 29, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss


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## Marilyn (Aug 2, 2006)

Oh chewie, let it out dear. Please don't ever be afraid to let it out. We'll be here when you need us.


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## Oma2three (May 5, 2012)

So very sorry for your loss.You are in my prayers.


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## Madame (Jan 1, 2003)

My heart aches for you.


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## GoldenWood Farm (May 31, 2003)

Oh Chewie I am so so sorry :Bawling:. I have no words but I can pray, my whole family and I will be lifting you all up in prayer. (((hugs)))

Justine


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## Lizza (Nov 30, 2005)

Oh Chewie, my heart literally hurts for your heart, and bring tears to my eyes. I am so sorry, I can not imagine the pain. There are no words because there are no words. Many prayers for your family.


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## Jan in CO (May 10, 2002)

So very sorry, Chewie. No words can express your pain, but the rest of your family has lost a daughter and sister as well. Try to hang to gether and help each other through it. Hugs
Jan


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## lemonthyme7 (Jul 8, 2010)

I am so very, very sorry.


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## ozark_jewels (Oct 7, 2005)

There are no words. And no way for me to know what you are going through. But I am so sorry....................................


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## mahnah (May 29, 2012)

Chewie, I wish there were words that could ease your pain but there are none, no actions nothing. You are the only one that can find the path to survive this. Sending lots of energies to you to help you find your way and will always be willing to just listen and let you yell or be quiet.


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## wannabechef (Nov 20, 2012)

I am sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter, though I do not have a daughter, I do have a son and I don't know what I would do if one day he wasn't here and I knew he wasn't coming back.

Prayers sent...


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## Kellkell (Nov 19, 2004)

I am wholeheartedly sorry for your loss.


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## SueMc (Jan 10, 2010)

I very, very sorry to read this. I can't begin to imagine.


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## jd4020 (Feb 24, 2005)

So very sorry to hear of your deep loss & pain.
Adding my prayers for you & you family in this dark time.
jd


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## Hannah90 (May 2, 2012)

I can only pray you can find some kind of peace with this someday, but I know how hard that is. Losing a child, I cannot even imagine as I do not have my own children. My heart breaks reading this, and my prayers are going out to you.


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## Minelson (Oct 16, 2007)

We are all with you Chewie....We are doing our best holding you up with prayer and whatever else we have. Please know that you are not alone in this. Our hearts are breaking with yours because you are part of this family. Through thick and thin. We are here for you in the best possible way through the internet. If we had it our way we would be physically embracing you. We would be making you eat and drink to survive. Please eat...even if it's just broth. Force it in. stay with us and your hubby and daughter. this will be a process. not any quick fix here. We are here for you through it all. ((((((((((hugs)))))))))


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## HilltopDaisy (Feb 26, 2003)

I'm so very sorry, will be praying for you and your family.


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## whiskeylivewire (May 27, 2009)

Oh Chewie...I'm so sorry and wish there was something I could do for you...you have my heartfelt prayers...


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## standles (Apr 12, 2013)

So sorry for your loss. The loss of a child is the worse kind of pain. You and your family are in my prayers. Know that this is not caused by God and I encourage you to run to him not away. Blessings, Steven


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## [email protected] (Feb 24, 2005)

I am so very sorry for your loss. I cannot begin to imagine your pain. My heart goes out to you. Please take care of yourself and ask for help when you need it.


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## Truckinguy (Mar 8, 2008)

I"m sorry for your loss and my deepest condolences to you and your family.


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## Forest (Oct 14, 2010)

I am very sorry for your loss-
you, and your family, are in my prayers.


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## alpacamom (Jan 28, 2007)

I'm so sorry for your loss! You're in my thoughts.


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## Homely (Aug 22, 2007)

I am so so sorry for your loss.


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## mayfinn farm (Nov 29, 2007)

Chewie, I am so sorry, you and your family are in my prayers.


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## noeskimo (Mar 17, 2011)

The worst thing ever, isn't it? Prayers are all I can offer.


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## jen74145 (Oct 31, 2006)

Chewie, I'm so sorry. There really aren't words.

I'm just so sorry.


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## ne prairiemama (Jan 30, 2010)

It is NOT your fault Chewie!! Some things we can't control some things we cannot protect our children from no matter how we want to  
God does love you and your daughter. This world is so terrible and sinful and full of pain. Horrific things happen to good people. I don't understand it all either...but I know He hasn't forgotten us, we just can't see the whole plan the way he can. 
I'm so so very sorry that your daughter has died. I know there are no right words, nothing that can fix this for you no matter how much we all wish we there was. We are all here for you friend, we care. (((((((((((HUGE HUGS))))))))))

Please try to eat or drink some ensure or something and take care of yourself even though you don't want to. Your younger child still needs you please don't forget that. You need to care for yourself. 

Probably because my son was recently born with life threatening heart defects, but that was the first thing that came to mind when you said she passed in her sleep. I am sure they will check for that and not sure I should even mention it but thought I would. Please forgive me if I shouldn't have. 
I am just sick to my tummy hearing of your loss. I'm heartbroken for you...
I'm sorry...

Our family will be praying for yours...


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## mzgarden (Mar 16, 2012)

Chewie, words are insufficient, but you are in our prayers. Others have been where you are - I know they will stand with you in a way that only those who have lost children can stand and support each other. Worst thing ever. I am so very very sorry.


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## CJBegins (Nov 20, 2009)

I cannot express how sorry I am. I cannot begin to feel your pain. But, I can, as one mother to another, tell you that God loves our children as much as we do. God will help you be strong if you will allow.

One breath at a time, one moment and one step at a time. 

We are all here for you, my friend.

Carla


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## Dale Alan (Sep 26, 2012)

I am so sorry to hear this,my condolences.


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## mamawojo (Aug 10, 2010)

My heart breaks for you. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.


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## where I want to (Oct 28, 2008)

I just wanted you to hear that you are in my heart.


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## kimmom2five (Apr 19, 2009)

I am so sorry.


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## bugstabber (May 12, 2002)

I'm so sorry.


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## ajaxlucy (Jul 18, 2004)

We can not take your pain away, but please know that so many of us here care a great deal about you. I am so very, very sorry.


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## Wendy (May 10, 2002)

I am so sorry to hear this. You will be in my prayers.


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## Nicole Irene (Jun 12, 2011)

I am so sorry for you and your family. 

The day my dad died, my brother heard someone tell him "3 o'clock" (my brother is not a religious person). My dad died at 3 that day. Someone knew the day and time my father would die. After he passed, my mom saw him. She said he was smiling. 

I hope you can find peace. I don't know how, but I hope you can.


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## JanO (Jun 17, 2003)

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Sending prayers to you and your family.


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## Sonshine (Jul 27, 2007)

I have not read through the responses, but your post brings back many memories. One thing I wanted to say to you is that Satan is out to steal, kill and destroy, but Jesus came to give us life. God did not take your daughter. I know the pain of losing a child. I have buried four of them. I know right now God may seem far away and life seems unfair. But I'm here to tell you that I could not have gotten through my losses without the Lord's help. I know it's hard to understand now, but Jesus can and will restore your peace and joy if you will let him. You're in my prayers and please, feel free to pm me if you would like to talk.


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## OK Yankee (Oct 30, 2005)

I, too, am so very very sorry. Some of the posters had good advice about eating. You need to keep your strength up. Please remember that everyone on this forum is praying for you and yours.


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## Just Little Me (Aug 9, 2007)

I am sorry you are going thru this. Yes it seems like a complete nightmare right now. I am just 8 months into the same nightmare. One day she was there, the next she was gone. Nothing could have been done to stop it, nothing I do now will bring her back.
Take baby steps my friend. Take one hour, one minute, one second if needed to make it thru the day.
Scream, cry, stomp, go out and throw jars at a tree. Anything that helps you relieve the some of the pain and stress of what you are feeling. Take walks, take naps, do what helps you feel a little better. Talk about her to anyone that will listen, do not keep it bottled up. Relive the favorite times, the saved memories. 
Be sure to take care of you, eat, sleep, get out in the sun. You have another child that needs you more now.They are scared and confused too. This can either make the two of you stronger or destroy you both.Do not lose your other child in your grief. They are hurting too.
A mothers bond and love is a hard thing to let go of, it will take time, and more time..... You will always love her.Just in a different way. I can not and will not say it will go away soon. I have talked to mothers that are still working thru the pain years after losing a child. 
This will be the hardest year coming up, everything will be the first without her. Let yourself take it slow and let the feelings come as they will.

But most of all take care of yourself.

I am a message away if you need to talk.I will give you my phone #.
( Holding you close)


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## Vernitta (Jan 14, 2009)

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I wish there was something I could say to help in some way. Please know that you are in my prayers and many others'.


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## Gritty (Nov 26, 2012)

You and your family are in my prayers.


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## aart (Oct 20, 2012)

My deepest condolences. I know there are no words. I lost my son, and my daughter lost her brother, 8 months ago to a drug and alcohol overdose. Part of your future is gone, but the rest remains. Some days it's all you can do to get up, eat and distract yourself in what ever way you can until it's time to sleep again. You will find your way thru it somehow, just keep on keeping on for those in your life who still need you.


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## NJ Rich (Dec 14, 2005)

My heart weeps for you and your family. 

The HT members and I pray for strength and Peace for you all. :grouphug:


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## LisaT (Oct 28, 2002)

Oh Chewie,

I have no words to express my deep sadness for you & your family. I do not know the pain of losing a child, but many here do. I can only imagine it is such a deep hurt that only Jesus can heal. We will be praying for you & your family.....


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## shannsmom (Jul 28, 2009)

My heart aches for you. I cannot imagine the pain your family must be feeling. You have my utmost sympathy.


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## Tinker (Apr 5, 2004)

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. So sorry you are having to go through this tragedy.


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## flowergurl (Feb 27, 2007)

I am so sorry, i can't begin to imagine the depth of your grief. {{HUGS}}
I have not lost a child and God willing, I will outlive mine.
I do not know why things happen in life that we have no idea about.
There are many things our brains can't begin to understand as we only see a small slice
of the picture. God sees the whole scope of things and understands all.
We just have to have faith and trust in him.


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## gardenmom (Dec 31, 2004)

I lost my daughter 4 yrs. ago and there are no words that make this better. But, please know that I am so sorry and you are in my heart and prayers.


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## texastami (Sep 13, 2002)

I am so sorry Chewie for your loss.... Please know that your are in our hearts and in our prayers... (((HUGS)))


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## Grandmotherbear (May 15, 2002)

Chewie, what BKB homestead said- the worst of it is not being able to fix things. I wish I could bring you a casserole and do your dishes and laundry- it could fix some of the very minor problems so you can do what you need to do right now. You can't fix what happened and you could not have prevented it- or it would never have happened. You are a great mother. It was not preventable. It was senseless, like why a tornado sets down here and kills these people instead of setting down over there and killing those instead. My heart hurts for you and your family. If there is ever ANYTHING one could do to help you need only post and there are many here beside me who would reach out to you.


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## RedSonja (May 16, 2010)

Chewie, there are no words to express how much sorrow I feel for your loss. Sending condolences to all that love her. *hugs* as wanted/needed.

-Sonja


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## CottageLife (Jul 20, 2009)

I am so very sorry for your loss of your wonderful Daughter. *hugs*


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## Ross (May 9, 2002)

Our condolences, I can't even start to imagine the loss.


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## myheaven (Apr 14, 2006)

Thinking of you today. We all love you so much. This song always speaks so much to me. 
http://m.youtube.com/?piggyback=2#/watch?feature=m-ch-fea&v=WGIumjD6I3M


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## Chixarecute (Nov 19, 2004)

I'm sorry, Chewie. One should never have to experience the death of a child. Praying for your comfort!


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## IMFoghorn (Jan 28, 2012)

Your loss saddens me beyond words. I am so sorry.


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## tinknal (May 21, 2004)

Words escape me, but know I have been thinking about you, and you and yours are in my prayers.


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## jamala (May 4, 2007)

So very sorry for your loss. Praying He will give you the strength to take one moment at a time.


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## Tacoma (Apr 3, 2013)

Prayers for you and your family. I am so sorry for your great loss.


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## SilverVista (Jan 12, 2005)

Through your pain may you find healing, through the darkness, light. May the boundless grace of the One who made us fill every empty, aching spot in your heart.


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## sherry in Maine (Nov 22, 2007)

I am so very sorry for your devastating loss!
I am so sorry!


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## chewie (Jun 9, 2008)

I have read every post. thank you to everyone. its hard to be online right now, nothing seems like a good idea. doing normal things seems like I am forgetting about her. disprespcting her. 

some minutes I have done ok, and others I crumble. I still cannot see how a God who claims to love could hurt our family so much. I don't want to be bitter, but I feel like that's what I'm becoming. I look around and see all these ppl who don't even care about their kids and I'm beyond furious with them. the ache is killing me. missing her will never end.

if I may, I do ask for your prayers. as right now I feel I cannot do it for myself. I feel horrible for being angry, but I feel my trust has been betrayed. the guilt of not checking on her and now the guilt of being angry is consuming at times. and I know none of it will do anything good. 

her service was saturday, and there were over 400 ppl there. we cant' keep up with the cards. she was so well loved, she wasn't one of those flashy kids, she was plain and simple and sweet. she made ppl feel happy, her spark was undeniable. and now it seems dark.

the other daughter does ok mostly but has bouts of sullen-ness and anger. one thing that is a blessing is several months ago and my husband and I had become very close again. I don't even know what changed, but I can't imagine a better husband. he also had become a better dad. 

I don't know how to be a mom of one. the sound of dd's alarm clock is terrifying. I'm scared I'll smother her, or ignore her. I still, for a millisecond, ready myself to call for cheyenne. or think that noise is her. or see her car and think for a split second, oh, she's home already. then it hits again and it rips open all over again. its the first thing I think of every morning, the last thing in my mind at night. how can a God of love and mercy do this to me????? she was on the edge of being an adult, and she was amazing. she deserved to marry, have babies, graduate, or just go on a trip. she deserved it all.


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## chewie (Jun 9, 2008)

this photo was snapped just a few weeks ago. its her in her room with her beloved dog chancie. it was a joke to have the dog in her bed like that, as when we were building my hubs said 'no dogs in the house'. so we giggled like naughty children when he oozed into her lap like this. she loved this photo. I really don't know how to live without her. I was a horrible person in the past, and I've had lots of my life, why couldn't I have taken her place????


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## kim&dave (Apr 1, 2013)

Sweet Lady, you may never know why this has happened. Please know that you have a lot of people thinking of you and your loss. I'm a mother, I can't even begin to know the pain you are in. I'll pray for you and your family.
I don't know you, but sometimes it helps to just talk about things with someone. Feel free to send me a private message if you need to talk.


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## vicker (Jul 11, 2003)

It is ok to be angry at God, Chewie. I can only say to try and voice that anger in prayer. You, and your family have suffered an unfathomable loss. I am so sorry.


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## kim&dave (Apr 1, 2013)

She was a beautiful girl! You should be very proud.


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## Elizabeth (Jun 4, 2002)

Dear Chewie-

My deepest condolences for your loss. Your daughter looks and sounds like a wonderful young woman, and I can only imagine the loss you are feeling right now.

I hope this won't sound presumptuous, but after reading your posts I would urge you to seek out a grief counselor. I am sure it seems impossible right now, but a grief counselor can help you deal with the range of emotions you are feeling right now, especially the anger and the guilt.

I will pray for you and your family, and hope that you can all find a way to heal from this devastating loss.


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## Suzyq2u (May 17, 2010)

Oh Chewie - I'm so very sorry. We're thinking of you & yours here at our house.


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## luckyinkentucky (Feb 15, 2013)

I read your post while I was work, and shed tears for your pain the rest of the day, wishing I could help. On my way home from work, I heard the story of little boy in Boston, and his dad coming home the night he died, while having to leave his wife and daughter in the hospital, still injured. I wept again. So much pain for your families. 
Your response is natural, you need to grieve. I will simply pray for you and your family. For you and your family to cling to each other and support each other during your crisis. For you and your family to find the strength to remember the good times you had with Cheyenne each and every day that you were blessed with her. 

You did nothing wrong, you were a good protector, think about that maybe she didn't need protecting from God. I know that doesn't alleviate your immediate pain, but in time, perhaps it will comfort you to think that your entire family will be reunited one day. 

All of these things I will pray for you and your family, as I am helpless and don't know what else to do.


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## dunroven (Dec 6, 2004)

Your family is in my prayers Chewie. I'm so sorry to hear about this, but as you are a believer, remember, God knew your daughter before the foundations of the world. Who better to know when her time was to go be with him, the one who knew her comings and her goings. Believe this, God didn't do this to hurt you. He allows things to come into our life that we don't understand, and sometimes here on this side we'll never know why, but she is there, getting things ready and she will be the first one to greet you with that beautiful smile when you step through the veil. Jesus said he has gone to prepare a place for us and if he goes and prepares a place, he will come again and receive us to himself that where he is, there we may be also. Maybe he needed her to help prepare the place for you and she's just waiting till the time is right to see you again. You haven't lost her Chewie, you have just given her into God's safe keeping. NOTHING can harm her now.

I hope this helps. We will pray for you.


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## SJSFarm (Jun 13, 2012)

May the Lord hold you in His arms


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## tarbe (Apr 7, 2007)

May the God of Peace keep you and sustain you.

I pray you will find the best way to carry on, so as to honor the memory of your precious daughter. 


Tim


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## pamda (Oct 14, 2004)

I can not even put into words how sorry I am.


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## Lizza (Nov 30, 2005)

Oh, Chewie, my heart literally breaks for you, your daughter was a beautiful lovely young woman and thank you for sharing her picture with us.


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## Yvonne (Jan 29, 2003)

I'm so sorry for your pain. Prayers for you and all who loved Chyenne.


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## Astrid (Nov 13, 2010)

My heart hurts for you. I have a daughter the same age as Cheyenne and I wouldn't know how to go on if something happened to her. I am so sorry. Our family is praying for you, that you can come to some peace.


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## RebelDigger (Aug 5, 2010)

Dear Lady, my heart aches for you. Often God's ways are simply unknowable to us mere humans. Please know that I will pray for God to give you and your family the strength to get through this. I am so very sorry.

ETA: "one thing that is a blessing is several months ago and my husband and I had become very close again. I don't even know what changed, but I can't imagine a better husband. he also had become a better dad."

Saw this after I first posted. Sweetie, God has not forsaken you, he did this months ago to prepare you and make you and your DH a stronger unit so that you could hold each other up. God, is what changed your hearts towards each other for this time.


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## myheaven (Apr 14, 2006)

Oh chewie she is so beautiful! My dd's and I have cried for you. Please seek a counselor. You your dh and dd will all grieve differently. This is very hard to face. You are walking every parents worst nightmare. All the emotions you feel are apart of this real life nightmare. Get stuff to smash. You have to let out the rage and then collapse in pure grief. It's ok to be angry, but don't let your heart harden. It's ok to remember the good times and smile laugh and cry. The raw wound will heal a little but the sadness will stay for all that was lost when she got to go before you. It's not fair! You can scream it. " IT'S NOT FAIR" it's hard to feel love when you feel so betrayed an abandoned by the one who is to love us the most.


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## Hears The Water (Aug 2, 2002)

I am so sorry. So very sorry. Praying for y'all.
God bless you and yours
Deb


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## laurafergie (May 5, 2010)

I am so sorry and can not imagine your grief. She is beautiful.


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## ntjpm (Sep 1, 2008)

Chewie, I am so sorry, please know that even though we have never met and will probably never meet that I have been praying for you and your family. 

Many years ago I lost a baby while I was pregnant and I was so angry at the Lord for it. The loss of the future, what I would not get to know, see or hold I could not understand why, what did I do to deserve to be punished? And I think I thought of about 100 different things that I did that caused my baby to die. I would turn on the vacuum cleaner and then just yell at God. I am sorry if that offends anyone, but it is true. 

I was so mad at God, He was supposed to love me so why was he hurting me? I eventually decided that He was ok with me being mad at Him, that He wanted to hear from me and that what He didn't want was for me to stop talking to Him. 

If there was one person (or being) on this planet that I should be able to share every single thing I was feeling even if it was complete and udder anger at Him then so be it. He has big shoulders and could handle it. 

I eventually went back to reading my Bible and found myself in the Psalms and what I found was David. God sure had a special place in His heart for him didn't he? And then two things struck me, David was not a great person if anyone didn't deserve a blessing then well David was it. The 2nd thing was David got MAD, and when he got angry he yelled, and he yelled at the Lord, In Psalms 22 He gets so angry at God and what did God do? He still loved him, He took it all and then even when David didn't deserve His love He gave it anyway. He still took Him in and wrapped His arms around him and just Loved him. 

I guess what I am saying is if David could yell and be angry at God then I sure as heck could too. 

Please Please Please know that in no way am I trying to minimize what you are feeling I simply cannot fathom the pain you are going thorough the strength you are having to find, I will continue to pray for you and your family and may you feel His arms surrounding you as you fall asleep each night.

Tracy in WA


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## NamasteMama (Jul 24, 2009)

I'm so truely sorry for your loss. Heavenly Father has a plan for each and everyone of us, and you daughter must have been a choice spirit to be called back to his arms. Our families are eternal and you will see your sweet daughter again. Despair not! Prayers are being said for you at our family prayer.

Please watch when you have a moment...
[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JiRc84kihRM&feature=youtube_gdata_player[/ame]


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## CaliannG (Apr 29, 2005)

Oh, chewie! There are no words, no nothing, that I could give that would help. All I can do it cry for you, hon, and I am doing that right now. I am SO sorry. No mother should EVER have to face this.


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## SageLady (Jun 10, 2008)

She was beautiful, Chewie. Again, I'm so sorry. I am keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers daily.


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## MullersLaneFarm (Jul 23, 2004)

Chewie, 

I've been thinking of you and praying for you all day. I can't imagine such a loss. It is my greatest fear.

Please, please! take comfort in our Lord! Being angry at Him? Scream at Him? Tell Him how unjust it was to take your daughter so soon? Sure, you betcha. He can take it. You _know _how big His shoulder are. Big enough to take all this and still wrap His loving arms around you. Just think of how many times your children have been angry with you because of a decision you made for them. You still loved them intensely even though they thought you were unfair. Just how much more does our Savior love us?

My father passed last fall, just 2 months after he was diagnosed with brain cancer. I was in the room when he passed. I _*felt *_Jesus take my Daddy's hand (and I was not the only one). Let me share how indescribably PERFECT His presence was. The Peace, the Joy, the LOVE that overwhelmed the room when Jesus was present to take my Daddy home is something I will never be able to describe accurately.

Please know that Cheyenne is with our Lord. She is in that Perfect Love of Jesus. We do not know why He took her so suddenly, but when you join her, you will understand.

Our prayers will be with you during this painful time.


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## mzgarden (Mar 16, 2012)

There are simply no words that can express the heart pain. Please allow yourself to feel all of the emotions. My friend who lost her son felt so confined and cheated by well-meaning friends and family that tried to tell her what was ok to feel and how she should act, be. I disagreed (sometimes pretty loudly). I sat with her while she raved, and ranted and sobbed and remembered the good times. It's ALL important and NONE of your feelings are wrong. I encourage you to avoid adding more pain by trying to live up to someone else's perception of how you should be. They don't know. This was not your fault and you should be allowed to feel whatever you feel. Surround yourself with people who will allow you to be/feel what you need to at the moment. I am so very sorry.


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## DamnearaFarm (Sep 27, 2007)

Oh Chewie, oh my God. I am so very, very sorry, Sweetheart.


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## Tricky Grama (Oct 7, 2006)

Ah, Chewie, I am so sorry, no words...prayers for you all.

Patty


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## danielsumner (Jul 18, 2009)

I've been following this thread from the beginning. I wanted to reply, but just couldn't figure out what to say. Words cannot express what you are going through. I donât pray, but you and your family are in my thoughts.

Daniel


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## Melissa (Apr 15, 2002)

Such a beautiful young lady... I pray for peace for you and your family.


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## CottageLife (Jul 20, 2009)

Your daughter was a beautiful young woma. I am so sorry for your loss. I'm sure finding out 'how' she passed isn't going to answer the 'why'. Right now I think if you can make it through each day you are doing pretty darn good. *hugs*


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## Chief Cook (Apr 24, 2011)

Chewie, I am so very sorry for your loss. I will continue to pray for your and your family. Hugs.


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## Jenstc2003 (Apr 4, 2012)

Noone other than a mother who has lost a child can totally understand how badly your heart has to be aching right now, but I can imagine, and I can only imagine how terribly your heart and the hearts of your whole family must be shattered. I'm so very sorry and will keep you and your family in prayer. 

As for God doing this... there are no answers that would even begin to help you, especially in these darkest depths of your sorrow, and not even the strongest faith can take the pain away. But I can promise you that He does love you. Perhaps some reason for this loss will be revealed one day, or perhaps you will always wonder why this happened, but that doesn't mean He doesn't love you. Not for a moment. He has strong arms, however, and can handle any anger or questions that you need to throw at Him. He can also be a quiet comfort through the many tears you will shed. After all, He gave you those emotions, and will understand.


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## rockinl (Mar 23, 2006)

Chewie, your beautiful daughter is with Jesus and your job is to be a good wife and mother now. It will be very, very hard. 
In honor of Cheyenne, put an extra dose of love in all that you do.
I would never presume to know your pain and I am praying for you and your family to know peace during this sad time.

When things seem too much to bear, lay all of your sadness at Jesus feet, leave them there and keep moving on to the next task. 

Come here and talk to your HT friends, we all love you.

Kimberly


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## sweet_mae (May 11, 2002)

I am so sorry for your loss


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## Jennifer L. (May 10, 2002)

Chewie, I can't imagine the pain you are feeling, all I can say is I am sorry for your loss and I hope you and your family find peace.


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## emdeengee (Apr 20, 2010)

I am so very, very sorry for your loss. Nothing hurts as deeply as the death of a child. I wish it were possible to just take away the pain.


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## sidepasser (May 10, 2002)

What a beautiful girl, I think she must be lighting up Heaven with her smile.


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## nodak3 (Feb 5, 2003)

Chewie--no matter how one has lost a child, be it death, kidnapping, disrupted adoption, whatever, there is pain. But you are walking through a special hell since you had no clue this was coming.

Your anger at God is very normal right now. Your mind and soul won't be able for a long time to realize God didn't do this, didn't send this. It is the enemy that comes to steal, kill, and destroy, not God.

But know this, please, Jesus weeps with you today and is just as angry as you are--just at Satan, not the Father.

I can promise you that you will get to the point where you can sense His loving presence.

In the mean time, tell Him what you are thinking and feeling. He can handle it.

It is hard for me to read this thread for the fact we lost a child in a different way than you have. While I have absolutely no clue to what you are feeling, I do get the pain and anger and frustration.

You better believe we are praying for you!


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## where I want to (Oct 28, 2008)

Such a beautiful young lady- such a loving picture. 
I think of you every day. 
When my sister died, who I always thought was the best of the family, I thought it was wrong, just all wrong. But I can see that all of us that were left needed the chance to grow into better people. And I don't so guilty about it now.
Nothing you feel is wrong- it is what you feel. A person who loved as much as you loved your daughter will find the way.


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## Danaus29 (Sep 12, 2005)

I saw the photos and now I can't stop crying. She was so beautiful and so special. 

A friend of mine lost her daughter a couple years ago. She said it doesn't get easier, you just learn how to cope better. 

All you can do is just keep going.


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## chewie (Jun 9, 2008)

today was hard earlier but is slipping into a dullness that is easier. I did scream and yell and carry on like a mad woman and that helped. 

I grew up learning that God doesn't cause these things but does allow them. allows this stuff if the person can handle it. how does anyone 'handle' it??? that's insane. I feel like a shell of what I was just days ago. 

top it off my MIL is mad that the cards she's received don't have money in them, as her elec. bill is late. I put it out of my mind every time it creeps in but I've never heard of anything so cold. 

I am trying to accomplish one task per day. just to move. its like there is no more air, no more light.


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## Danaus29 (Sep 12, 2005)

Your mil sounds like a real piece of work. I am sorry she felt it was necessary to burden you with her issues when you already have so much on your plate.


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## Sonshine (Jul 27, 2007)

chewie said:


> I have read every post. thank you to everyone. its hard to be online right now, nothing seems like a good idea. doing normal things seems like I am forgetting about her. disprespcting her.
> 
> some minutes I have done ok, and others I crumble. I still cannot see how a God who claims to love could hurt our family so much. I don't want to be bitter, but I feel like that's what I'm becoming. I look around and see all these ppl who don't even care about their kids and I'm beyond furious with them. the ache is killing me. missing her will never end.
> 
> ...


We adopted our DS 14 years ago and to this day I catch myself checking him in the middle of the night, but it does get easier. I'm sure you've seen some of my posts about my own losses in the past. I'm not saying things will ever be what they were. I still have days that are hard for me, but as time goes on and as I've allowed God to heal my broken heart, those times are fewer and of shorter durations. Right now the wound is still raw, it hurts and you feel that emptiness. Your life will change. But your life will go on and eventually you'll start to really live again. My prayers for you are that the Lord will send the comforter to you as you mourn your loss and that He reminds you constantly that your daughter is in a much better place. She's where no bombs will ever harm her, no deviant will ever rape her, she feels no pain, just peace and joy. We are not told not to mourn, only to not mourn as those who have no hope. If your daughter was a Christian, then you know where she is and that one day you have a chance of being reunited. Hold on to that hope and take life minute by minute.


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## Annsni (Oct 27, 2006)

chewie said:


> today was hard earlier but is slipping into a dullness that is easier. I did scream and yell and carry on like a mad woman and that helped.
> 
> I grew up learning that God doesn't cause these things but does allow them. allows this stuff if the person can handle it. how does anyone 'handle' it??? that's insane. I feel like a shell of what I was just days ago.
> 
> ...


Sometimes we CAN'T handle it - but we can with His help. It doesn't make sense to us and it sucks in such a big way but when we know God's character, we can trust Him even when we don't like it. 

Forget your MIL right now. She is also going through grief and she needs to find someone else to help her through it - you do not do it. You need to find your own way through this overwhelming, drowning grief and trying to help her won't help you right now. ((HUGS)) You are absolutely being bathed in prayer!


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## Jenstc2003 (Apr 4, 2012)

Wow- that is just about as cold as a person could get. Your MIL must really be a piece of work to make a comment like that at such a time. It sure sounds like you are doing exactly what you need to do in order to get through this. One step at a time, one day at a time. Maybe one minute at a time. Only time can ease the pain, but as you say, sometimes a long, tear filled and very loud rant will also help. *hugs* 



chewie said:


> today was hard earlier but is slipping into a dullness that is easier. I did scream and yell and carry on like a mad woman and that helped.
> 
> I grew up learning that God doesn't cause these things but does allow them. allows this stuff if the person can handle it. how does anyone 'handle' it??? that's insane. I feel like a shell of what I was just days ago.
> 
> ...


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## OkieDavid (Jan 15, 2007)

You have my deepest sympathies for your loss. No words can provide adequate comfort but I pray you see these messages of inspiration and receive some level of comfort in knowing that total strangers care for you and your family.


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## Suecloudy (Apr 21, 2008)

My deepest sympathy and heartfelt prayers to you and your family now and in the future.


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## jen74145 (Oct 31, 2006)

She was beautiful.

I'm reading, and listening, and just have little to say. I am so, so sorry.


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## Jerngen (May 22, 2006)

A beautiful girl. 

((hugs))


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## modineg44 (Jun 25, 2002)

I'm so sorry about your loss. My daughter died in Jan. 2000. There is no right or wrong way to grieve. Please don't worry about being so mad at God. My coping mechanism after the funeral was to pretend like nothing had happened. That lasted about a week. You will find your own way to deal with it in time. Please know that I am grieving with you. 

Nancy


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## Astrid (Nov 13, 2010)

I'm sorry your mil decided to say that. Hopefully she is not really that insensitive normally. Continued hugs and prayers from afar.


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## shanzone2001 (Dec 3, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. I won't pretend to understand your pain but I have said a prayer for you and your family.


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## Celtichorse (Jun 26, 2012)

I'm so sorry for your loss!!! You're in my prayers!


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## GarlicGirl (Mar 12, 2010)

I too am grieving for you. I hope that our hugs, prayers and best wishes bring you and your family comfort.


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## Ruby (May 10, 2002)

Chewie, I just now read this. I am so sorry. She was a very beautiful girl. The only thing I can say is we don't know the future but God does. He knew what may have been ahead of her. But now she is in his arms.


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## Awnry Abe (Mar 21, 2012)

Chewie,

I have been hurting for you and thinking of your pain for days. I am glad you posted a picture of Cheyenne. She is a beautiful young lady. Her smile looks like it could warm up the coldest room. One day, your tears and bitterness will be replaced with joy and tenderness when you see her again. 

--Chris


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## Zephaniah (Mar 16, 2010)

Rest assured, God did NOT cause this;

(James 1:13) When under trial, let no one say: &#8220;I am being tried by God.&#8221; For with evil things God cannot be tried nor does he himself try anyone.

This causes us grief thus God did not do it. However consider who is responsible. Notice what Jesus said about the devil

(John 12:31) Now there is a judging of this world; now the ruler of this world will be cast out.

*The ruler of this world*. And that he will be cast out. 

God wants us to live peaceful and happy and soon he will fix all these things. See what Daniel 2:44 says;

(Daniel 2:44) &#8220;And in the days of those kings the God of heaven will set up a kingdom that will never be brought to ruin. And the kingdom itself will not be passed on to any other people. It will crush and put an end to all these kingdoms, and it itself will stand to times indefinite;

When this system governments and its ruler, Satan are cast out then this prophecy comes true;

(Revelation 21:3, 4) With that I heard a loud voice from the throne say: &#8220;Look! The tent of God is with mankind, and he will reside with them, and they will be his peoples. And God himself will be with them. 4&#8239; And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away.&#8221;

Along with that , your daughter has the opportunaty for hope as said here;

(Acts 24:15) and I have hope toward God, which hope these [men] themselves also entertain, that there is going to be a resurrection of both the righteous and the unrighteous.

I know it hurts, but dont fret (Psalm 37:10) And just a little while longer, and the wicked one will be no more; And you will certainly give attention to his place, and he will not be. Also know that God cares for you

(1 Peter 5:6, 7) Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt YOU in due time; 7&#8239;while YOU throw all YOUR anxiety upon him, because he cares for YOU.


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## SageLady (Jun 10, 2008)

Chewie, about your MIL - my Mother focused on petty things when my Dad died suddenly without any warning. It seemed cold to the family at the time, but later we realized that's how she coped those first few weeks. She couldn't face what had really happened, so she focused on small things that really didn't matter. She stopped eating though and she became dangerously thin within the first year. We never saw any tears, but it soon became apparent to us that she was devastated. 
This may be how your MIL is coping with losing Cheyenne. It's a form of denial.

I have prayed for you several times today, Chewie. My heart just hurts for you and your family. I wish there was more I could say that would give you comfort, but words aren't sufficient...


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## Common Tator (Feb 19, 2008)

Oh Chewie, I'm so sorry! I just read this thread. I can't imagine the depth of your loss. Parents shouldn't have to bury their children.

I'm praying for you and your family.


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## Joe.G (Jun 26, 2012)

SO sorry, I deal with death at work often, When it is younger people or kids, it is very hard I do break down at times even if I didn't know them, This is my worst fear and I am once again so very sorry, As time goes on it'll get easier I guess. Your Daughter is a very pretty lady, Don't beat yourself up over this there is nothing you could have done. Your MIL I hope is just going though a hard time also and just was talking to talk, peop0le deal with things differently. God Bless you and your family.


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## Minelson (Oct 16, 2007)

Still constantly thinking about you and praying for you Chewie. <3


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## horsepoor21 (Mar 14, 2007)

Oh my goodness , my heart just breaks for you . My family is praying for you .


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## mekasmom (Jan 19, 2010)

Your daughter is so very beautiful. I'm so sorry she couldn't live her on earth any longer. And I know she must be very thankful that you were her mom. I'm sorry.


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## grandmajo (Mar 25, 2008)

I'm so sorry chewie


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## HOTW (Jul 3, 2007)

Chewie

it isn't that God hands us stuff that we can handle, he hands us stuff that makes us stronger. It is very hard to be looking down a road that is very bleak but over time the sun will come out to shine again.. I Promise this.


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## chewie (Jun 9, 2008)

I want to thank you all on this thread, and on the other one I recently posted on--I know I am angry and bitter right now. thank you for being patient and kind towards me.

today my youngest came home, apparently my darling cheyenne had already lined up someone to do youngest's hair for this saturday's prom, as a suprise for her. so typical of her! its this stuff I miss so badly. even ppl who were somewhat outcasts talk of her, as she was kind to them all.

I hope your'e right hotw, as right now it seems there will never be sun again. and I really dont' even care.


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## pattycake (May 16, 2010)

Oh, how I hurt for you. My mother also always said that no matter how dark the clouds are, the sun will always break thru and shine again. She said this after burying two daughters. I don't know how you are going to make it but please picture all of us holding hands and forming a circle around you. We sorrow with you.


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## KentuckyDreamer (Jan 20, 2012)

Chewie, I remember after a major loss wanting to attack the people in the car next to us. They were happy and laughing. How dare they? Didn't they know the world has ended? Irrational I know, but real. 

My words mean nothing and cannot help, but please know, so many care and completely understand your anger, bitterness, questions. I know there is no way through this but to go through it, but every night I pray you have love and support to walk with you.


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## jkhs (Sep 17, 2010)

Chewie, I am so sorry for you loss.


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## Nature_Lover (Feb 6, 2005)

chewie my heart is breaking for you. 
You're in my thoughts, I'm sending healing energy for strength and peace.


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## Sonshine (Jul 27, 2007)

Chewie, I sent you a pm.


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## CottageLife (Jul 20, 2009)

chewie said:


> today my youngest came home, apparently my darling cheyenne had already lined up someone to do youngest's hair for this saturday's prom, as a suprise for her. so typical of her! its this stuff I miss so badly. even ppl who were somewhat outcasts talk of her, as she was kind to them all.


How sweet of Cheyenne!


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## Susan-Ga (Mar 29, 2012)

So sorry for ypu familys loss


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## Macybaby (Jun 16, 2006)

I am very sorry for your loss.

I hope you are at a point you can think about what I'm going to write.

God has not changed. He is the same as He was before this happened. He has always let horrid things happen to people, since Cain slew Abel.

So what has changed? This time it happened to you and not someone else. So you have to think long and hard if you want to love and serve a God that has always allowed things like this to happen here on earth. God is the same today as yesterday as always.

it is fine to be angry at God

If a person does not love the Lord unconditionally, then they do not love the Lord . . .


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## rainbowshades (Sep 26, 2005)

So Sorry for your loss - sending prayers your way to comfort/assist you.


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## Sonshine (Jul 27, 2007)

Macybaby said:


> I am very sorry for your loss.
> 
> I hope you are at a point you can think about what I'm going to write.
> 
> ...


I agree, it's fine to be angry at God, David got angry at God too. However, at some point David got to the place that he could finally leave things in God's hands. I know that it may take awhile, but eventually I pray that Chewie is able to say, not my will, but thine.


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## michelleIL (Aug 29, 2004)

This will take a serious amount of time to process, but you will eventually! Just allow yourself to grieve the way you are designed to and don't feel bad if grieving lasts longer than you "think" it should. (((chewie)))


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## where I want to (Oct 28, 2008)

I just want you to know that you are in my thoughts every day.


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## Joshie (Dec 8, 2008)

I cannot imagine not being angry right now. I pray that you will let the Lord comfort you and that you will let Him use this for his glory. God did not do this to you. Mankind did it to ourselves through our sin. 

Unimaginably horrible things will happen in our lives, things we will never, in this lifetime, understand. I pray that you'll feel God's comforting arms around you. He has a plan.


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## MoTightwad (Sep 6, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss. Believe me, it will get a LITTLE better as time goes on, but you will miss her forever. We lost our youngest son and the hurt is numbing. Only time and prayer helps. God does not inflict the loss on you with out a reason. Just think of the ones you have left that need your love and care and let them love you in return. I know this from our kids loving me back all the while I was so numb. I continually bless them for taking the time off work to stand by me and be with me. They were a constant reminder of what I had done in raising them to be kind considerate people. One day at a time is all you can hope to accomplish at this time. My prayers are for you and family and for the strength to go on. Love and hugs and prayers to all of your family.


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## jamo (Jun 6, 2002)

Everything you said is true. You cannot even know how to take your next breath. But you will. And you'll keep on breathing and everyday will pass and one day you'l smile. It will braeak your heart because you'll feel so guilty. But day after day you'll remember and cry and be sad. It really never stops, you just learn how not to let it show on the outside. Much love, Jan PM me if you need me


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## Marianne (Feb 22, 2009)

I am so very very sorry. You're living a parents worst nightmare. We all wish we could help, take some of the pain away. I'm praying for you and your family. I wish I had words of comfort and wisdom for you, but I don't know WHAT to say. I'm just sorry....


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## nancy237 (May 29, 2008)

I just read tonight your post about your loss...

Wishing I could give you hugs in person, fix you a meal & hot tea
and be there to just be by your side..

I lost my husband last year but I think a child would be the hardest thing of all to endure..

Only advice I can think of is to allow yourself to grieve however it comes for you..Whatever helps you through the day ...
Don't expect yourself to be functioning normal...

I was mad at God and not speaking to him for almost a year..Someone told me that he has wide shoulders and can handle our emotions..I liked that image..


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## CajunSunshine (Apr 24, 2007)

Death leaves a heartache no human can heal, but love leaves memories no one can steal.

I am praying for you and yours to have the "peace of God that excels all thought" (Philippians 4:7), especially during times we are too numb to think, or feel much of anything other than grief and yes, even anger...

Soon, the very idea of death will be a thing of the past... and God "...will wipe out every tear...and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be any more..." (Revelation 21:4)

To give you an idea how God and Jesus feels about death, consider how Job took comfort in the hope of a resurrection, and the Scriptures show that God has a yearning to resurrect... (Job 14:15)

Jesus was groaning with grief over the death of Lazarus, although he knew he would resurrect the dead man... His emotional response showed the depth of grief he still felt. In his prayer to God just before raising Lazarus from the dead, he made it clear that God was the Source of the resurrection (John 11:41, 42)

This and other accounts in the Scriptures gives us hope for the future, when "all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out." When? Soon, mankind's tragic experiment with rebellious independence and Satan's challenge to God's sovereignty is fast coming to an end. God has allowed ample time for humans to answer Satan's challenge of rebellion and independent rule without God. Soon God will crush and put to an end all manmade governments, and will restore His kingdom on earth again. (Daniel 2:44) This is what Jesus taught his followers to pray for in the Lord's prayer (Matthew 6:9-15).

When this prophecy is fufilled, we will enjoy seeing our dead loved ones again and willexperience the blessings of the promises recorded in Revelations 21:1-6. There, it says in part: "...and the tent of God is with mankind, and He will reside with them, and they will be His people. And God himself will be with them. And He will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more, neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be any more. The former things have passed away. And the One seated on the throne said: "Look! I am making all things new." Also He says: "Write, because these words are faithful and true."



Take heart and have faith in the resurrection hope, and that you will see your dear daughte


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## Minelson (Oct 16, 2007)

Thinking about you and praying for you every day Chewie. I'm here if you want a shoulder or need to vent or anything.... ((((hugs))))


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## Sonshine (Jul 27, 2007)

Romans 8:18-19

18 For I consider that our present sufferings cannot even be compared to the coming glory that will be revealed to us. 19 For the creation eagerly waits for the revelation of the sons of God.

Chewie, I'm still praying for you and thinking about you every day. God bless you.


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## home~girl (Nov 26, 2005)

You are in my prayers.... I am so sorry ,and I know there are no words that can suffice.I pray time makes it easier to just breathe... 

I too lost my son suddenly last week on the 10th. I feel like you, I have one son left and I don't want to smother him but I don't know how to be Mom to an only child. It's a club no one should have to join, this loss of a child. HUGS..............


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## pattycake (May 16, 2010)

homegirl, I am so deeply sorry that you lost your son. Deeply, deeply sorry.


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## Sonshine (Jul 27, 2007)

home~girl said:


> You are in my prayers.... I am so sorry ,and I know there are no words that can suffice.I pray time makes it easier to just breathe...
> 
> I too lost my son suddenly last week on the 10th. I feel like you, I have one son left and I don't want to smother him but I don't know how to be Mom to an only child. It's a club no one should have to join, this loss of a child. HUGS..............


 
I'm so sorry for your loss. I agree that it's a club no one should have to join, however, many of us have. Some have been members for some time now and are here for those of you just entering into it. My prayers go out to you.


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## Cece (Nov 7, 2009)

I saw your post last night for the first time but wanted to ponder how to respond. I am so sorry for your loss. My oldest son died 2 years ago and it was a shock. Job 13:15 popped in my head at that time.....Though he slay me, yet will I trust in him. I cried so much and I still cry. This is not something you will ever get "over." But, it is something you will get through, with the Lord's help. I had to keep reminding myself at the time of my son's death that it was something that did not take the Lord by surprise. He knew what was going to happen and he is there for you. Someone once said, when you cannot see the hand of God, you must trust the heart of God. 

Cry whenever you need too. Be angry when you need to. Do not try to control your emotions, just let them flow. And in it take it to the Lord. He will never leave you or forsake you. He is there for you. 

I have been and will be praying for you. You can PM me if you would like.


Home-girl - I am praying for you too. I am so sorry for your loss as well. Again, you can PM me if you want to.


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## pattycake (May 16, 2010)

Cece, I sorrow for you too. How good of you to come forward with your warm words of comfort to others who have lost a child.


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## Country Wench (Mar 21, 2012)

I have not had to walk this road and I pray I never do.... But please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. I agree with those who have said to cry, scream, allow your anger and frustration and sorrow to vent. Hug your husband and younger daughter and know that by doing that you are hugging Cheyenne as well. For she will be watching over and loving her family from heaven and waiting to see you there when the time is come - right now she is brightening heaven's light and being her sister's special guardian angel. I will be praying for some measure of comfort and peace to come to you......


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## stirfamily (Jun 18, 2002)

Dear Chewie, I can't even imagine what you're going through. My heart breaks for you and your family. You all will be in my prayers.


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## Carol from Upto (Dec 29, 2008)

Chewie, I am so deeply sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you. I will pray for you and you family.


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## Riverdale (Jan 20, 2008)

chewie said:


> I cannot see how to finish raising the younger one. what kind of wife can i be. I was to protect her and she's gone. and nobody can tell me why. she came home that day just fine. passed in the night, it looks instant. what kind of god does that? what kind of god burns pain into my souL??



Sorry for your loss Chewie, I went through it with a godchild (my 1st cousin's son).

If you give up, what is there for her sibling? It stinks to say "be strong', but*you* must be strong. If not, then I have no advice.

This might sound harsh, but buck up. You have other people depending on you. Do *NOT* surrender to self-pity.

Mourn as you must, celebrate her life as you should


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## where I want to (Oct 28, 2008)

I have so little to say that I think might even come close to being useful to you now. But I know that you will find your way.


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## whiterock (Mar 26, 2003)

So sorry for your loss.


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## Taking A Break (Nov 30, 2012)

Chewie, I don't post here often but I want you to know that I am still praying for you and your family.


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## stickinthemud (Sep 10, 2003)

Chewie, so so sorry for your loss. Prayers for you and your family. So so sorry.


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## MJDC (Mar 26, 2013)

Dear Chewie~ I am so sorry. I hope you find some answers or hope to help you keep going.

Michelle


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## Jokarva (Jan 17, 2010)

Thinking of you and your family today Chewie, and keeping you all in my prayers.


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## Queen Bee (Apr 7, 2004)

Chewie, I haven't read all the post but I did read all of the ones you posted. I can't begin to imagine how heart broken you are at this time... But I will pray that when the time is right, when your angry slips into remembering all the sweet memories , you will decide to do something to honor your daughter. Start a fund to help other young girls, start a dog rescue in her honor or just put a bench somewhere she would love to be..... I think this would help you speed the healing process... Prayers for you and your family...


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## Umble (Apr 23, 2013)

I don't know you (yet), but as a parent myself, I couldn't read your post and not respond. I can only imagine what you're going through, and I hope that you and your family can draw together, and find some peace in each other's company. I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## VA Susan (Mar 2, 2010)

My heart goes out to you, Chewie. I pray that the God of all comfort will bind up all your broken hearts. We lost our daughter and it was the saddest thing we've ever been through. We never got to know her here but we will meet her one day. Heaven will be sweeter because of her going there before us. 

This was a comforting quote to read after our own loss.



> Robert E. Lee upon the death of his daughter Annie:
> The ties to earth are taken, one by one, by our Merciful God to turn our hearts to Him and to show us that the object of this life is to prepare for a better and brighter world. May we all be there united to praise and worship Him forever and ever!
> 
> "...I cannot express the anguish I feel at the death of our sweet Annie.
> ...


Also this booklet was one of the most helpful things we read. It was written by a pastor who lost his 12 year old daughter. It's only 2.50 at Amazon. 
http://www.amazon.com/Behind-Frowni...-1-fkmr0&keywords=behind+a+frowing+providence


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## Laura (May 10, 2002)

Chewie, I am sorry, and I know those words are not enough.

I lost my daughter 25 years ago. The only people who know the devastation are others who walk in those shoes. There is a bereavement group called Compassionate Friends for parents and siblings who have lost a child. I could not have walked those first years without them. 

I learned the physical pain of a broken heart is normal, but I still need to be there for my family. They lost a child and a sister. 

People are terrified by this, what if it happens to them? They don't know what to say. They will say stupid things or avoid you altogether. 

As you move through the stages of grief, life get easier. It starts with remembering to breathe, then adding putting one foot in front of the other. In years, you will discover you are living again. 

Your family does not have to walk this path alone. Find a local chapter of Compassionate Friends and attend, even if you have to drive a distance.


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