# getting it under control



## mrsgcpete (Sep 16, 2012)

hi, 
so i am sure you have heard this story a zillion times. mine is a little different from what i have read so i am going to try asking. 
we have 5 people that live in the house most of the time, dh works at home, 2 home schooled kiddos, and me, youngest dd goes to school but wont in the fall, a dog, and two guinea pigs. homeschooling can take most of the day, we usually have something in the evenings and then we are so exhausted we usually collapse, pm weekends its go go go most of the time.

We have your occasional garden variety bug here and there. no infestations of any sort. we dont hoard but we have major clutter, and i am the only one that seems inclined to minimalism. i wouldnt eat off the floors, and the kitchen is piled with dirty dishes but we get enough cleaned to keep everyone in clean clothes and eating off clean plates. 

i want to get to a point where i am on routine, i have anxiety issues and get overwhelmed easily. we were at a camp a few weeks ago and they had checklists, does any one use a check list? how do you keep it all under control? i wasnt taught to be a housekeeper, my mother wanted to do it all herself...and to be honest i have so many artsy projects in my head that cleaning will never be a hobby. Where do i start? i dont want it pristine but i want it comfortable and manageable. thanks for your ideas. i have tried fly lady it was too rigid for our schedule.


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## amandaleigh (Apr 10, 2013)

I am not a huge fan of cleaning either, but I hate seeing my house dirty or cluttered. Growing up, my family lived in a tiny house that would look messy with just a few things out of place, just because of how little space we had. My mother trained us to constantly put items away as we finished. If you used a dish, you immediately washed it (or rinsed and placed in the dishwasher). Mail immediately got opened and filed or tossed. If the whole family follows these behaviors you will only have the heavier cleaning left - bathrooms, floors, and dusting.


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## emdeengee (Apr 20, 2010)

The only advice I can give is that you have to make the time to clean and organize and then continue to make the time to keep it up. If this requires giving up something else so that you have that time then that is a choice you may have to make. 

We never did any extra activities on one day of the weekend - either the Saturday or the Sunday. This was the day we stayed home and did all the cleaning and laundry and out door chores. During the week we did basic maintenance along with the cooking.

You are not alone. Your kids and husband can help. Chores are good for everyone and many hands make light work. It is also very important to establish rules that can easily be followed. But they have to be enforced. For example - no clothes on the floor or furniture - dirty clothes in the hamper, no eating anywhere but at the table, clean the tub and sink after you use it, no shoes in the house, rinse your dishes and stack in the sink, if you consider it important then keep it in your room, keep your room tidy.

The most important thing is to organize your house. Every thing should have its place and be kept there or returned to it. This makes tidying and then cleaning very fast and efficient.


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## Wolfy-hound (May 5, 2013)

I'm battling this in my own house.

It's a dump. It's probably 150% better than it was, but still a dump. 

What is working for ME is that I make a list of ALL the big things that need to be done. This includes a lot of chores that seem so simple and quick. I put "wash dishes", clean counter, clean stove, mop kitchen... on the list. Why? Because if I get most of those done, I've scratched a bunch of things off the list, instead of not being able to scratch "clean kitchen" off the list just because I got everything BUT mopping the floor done. 

I also divide up the problem areas. I try to clean one new area each time(it's not every day, but as often as I can) and I also maintain all the places I already cleaned.

For instance, I cleared off the kitchen table, the counters and a large wooden lizard cage. Next, I'll clear off a set of shelves, while keeping all those cleaned off as well. The amount of places I have to maintain grows each time, but the effort is less and I can see a visible difference, which is encouraging.

For cleaning I make a daily list that gets done. I have a weekly schedule that has certain things listed on certain days so that they get done weekly but I don't have to spend an entire DAY just cleaning. Some each day doesn't feel that bad.

I backslide some days. But I remind myself that the house didn't get into this shape in a day(or a week !) and to expect it to be completely cleared, cleaned and set up in a day is ridiculous. It helps. If I feel like I'm making a difference, I can keep going and working on it.


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## Maura (Jun 6, 2004)

I would start with giving each child a kitchen chore. One cleans up after breakfast (dishes, wash counters, sweep floor), one cleans up after lunch, one cleans up after dinner. This gives everyone a small manageable job. If one of the kids is really to young to have this job, you are allowed to be his helper. If the kitchen is clean and tidy it just makes you feel less overwhelmed, and it gives the kids valuable life lessons.

Besides the kitchen chore, I would have three more daily jobs that the kids rotate by week. Clean the bathroom every day; pick up and vacuum the living room and dining room; pick up and sweep the mud room or hallway, or what have you.

Pick an age when they can do their own laundry. By ten they ought to be putting their own clothes in a hamper and changing their own sheets. By thirteen, they can do their own laundry, leaving me with towels and napkins.

Once you have the kids working, I mean doing a good job every day, you will find your house is so much more manageable.


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## pattycake (May 16, 2010)

Do you have someone (mother, sister, friend) that you could enlist their help? You might need someone with a different mind set to help you get organized and clean. At that point you as a family could designate maybe one evening a week for cleaning and tidying up? I can feel for you with everyone home all it has to be hard to get things done.


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## nostawmama (Dec 29, 2011)

I am not sure what kind of homeschool program/schedule you follow but consider replacing a "book learning" lesson with a "running/maintaining a household" lesson. This would give a scheduled place for housecleaning and teach the children something that you missed out on as a child!

Life skills are an important part of being an adult and it is sometimes missed by well meaning parents.


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## mrsgcpete (Sep 16, 2012)

To clarify dh is a full and willing partner in this and does a great job of helping


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## Txsteader (Aug 22, 2005)

mrsgcpete said:


> To clarify dh is a full and willing partner in this and does a great job of helping


Then get those kiddos involved. Like nostawmama said, those are important life skills for kids to learn. 

And when everyone pitches in, it makes keeping a tidy/clean home less of a burden for you.


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## KyMama (Jun 15, 2011)

Our family is similar to yours with me, DH, 2 homeschooled kids, 2 indoor cats and 2 outdoor dogs. I posted a picture of my cleaning checklist on one of the other threads, but I've recently changed things up a bit. I decided that I needed better organization all around so I made a household binder. If you've never seen one a quick google search will pull up all kinds of pictures and printable pages. Mine includes sections for calendar, cleaning, menu, finance and contacts. The cleaning section has a checklist for each day, week and a monthly to do list. I'll post a screenshot of it, but it includes simple things like Wolfy-hound said. It feels really good to mark off things on the checklist and it helps motivate me to get other things done. I don't get everything done each month, like washing the walls, but I can look back at the lists and see what I haven't gotten done in the last few months and concentrate on that. The weekends are for catching up on the weekly chores. I know that you said you are busy on the weekends too, but maybe you could take a few minutes just to get one thing done. Those few minutes add up and before you know it you've gotten a lot done. The binder also helps when DH is home and asks what needs to be done because I can just hand it to him. I'm not saying that you should jump right in with a long cleaning list like mine, it's taken several years to get the list this long. Just start with a handwritten checklist that needs to be done every day or week then post it on the fridge or somewhere that you and your helpers can see it. 

As a homeschooler I know that you can multitask so maybe you can try washing dishes while cooking meals. I hate being in the kitchen in the evenings when DH is home so I try to wash dishes as I cook supper and then scrape and stack our dishes for the morning. (Flylady would not like me! ) The next morning I wash those dishes while I'm fixing breakfast and the same thing for lunch. I know it's not perfect, but it helps me keep things under control. And I totally agree with nostawmama about teaching the kids to help as a life skills lesson. You didn't say how old your children are, but even littles can sweep and dust. My 6 year old loves to sweep and mop. It's definitely not perfect, but it's better than not doing it all. My oldest has been doing his and his brothers laundry for years. With all the video games they play nowadays I figured the washer and dryer should be easy to figure out. They also make their own beds in the morning and are responsible for keeping their rooms picked up. And I'm a mean mommy because I don't let them bring their stuff into the living room area. They have their own rooms to play in and it keeps a lot of clutter out of the common areas. If you don't mind them bringing toys and stuff out of their rooms try to keep a basket for each that they can put their toys back in each evening. 

If you click the picture it should open my photobucket page so you can actually read it.


ETA: With my OCD I get overwhelmed easily too. If I walk into a room that needs to be cleaned without a checklist I can guarantee you that nothing is getting finished. One step at a time helps me keep the anxiety under control.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

mrsgcpete said:


> hi,
> so i am sure you have heard this story a zillion times. mine is a little different from what i have read so i am going to try asking.
> we have 5 people that live in the house most of the time, dh works at home, 2 home schooled kiddos, and me, youngest dd goes to school but wont in the fall, a dog, and two guinea pigs. homeschooling can take most of the day, we usually have something in the evenings and then we are so exhausted we usually collapse, pm weekends its go go go most of the time.


5 people in the home; Check
Home schooled kids: Check
2 dogs: Check
dh worked outside the home in the day, I worked out side the home at night.



> We have your occasional garden variety bug here and there. no infestations of any sort. we dont hoard but we have major clutter, and i am the *only one that seems inclined to minimalism.* i wouldnt eat off the floors, and the kitchen is piled with dirty dishes but we get enough cleaned to keep everyone in clean clothes and eating off clean plates.


Dh is likes to hoard. He comes from a long line of hoarders.
One day I woke up and said "enough".
I have been purging ever since.
Everyone is lucky I cannot lift like I used too otherwise this house, would be empty.
The kitchen is THE number one room in the house that HAS to be clean.
It is the room that will send me into a tirade if it's bombed out.
Working in restaurants for 30 years, I know what 'grows' in a dirty kitchen, and what a dirty kitchen attracts....bleck.

Many years ago (when the kids were too young to help) after asking MULTIPLE times to keep the kitchen clean, and I was ignored? 
I took everything that was in the sink and on the counter, put it in a huge green garbage bag, and threw it away. 
I said "if you're not going to clean it, you don't need it".

That HAS to be the one room in the whole home, that is clean AND tidy for me.



> i want to get to a point where i am on routine, i have anxiety issues and get overwhelmed easily. we were at a camp a few weeks ago and they had checklists, does any one use a check list?


I live and die by the check list.



> how do you keep it all under control?


1. Make lists.
2. One room at a time.
3. Delegate. Assign jobs. Demand, excellence.
4. Purge, Purge, Purge, Purge



> i wasnt taught to be a housekeeper, my mother wanted to do it all herself..


I was a total opposite. I HAD to do house work, and it was all the disgusting stuff my mom didn't want to do.....so I was a slob, for years. 
Then one day, I had to call the police, because I thought I had an intruder. 
The look on their faces when they came out of my house shamed me, and from that day forward I have kept a neat, and clean home.



> and to be honest i have so many artsy projects in my head that cleaning will never be a hobby.


Cleaning is not a hobby for me, it's a 'job'. 
Like any other job, it has to be done. 
When the house gets cluttered, floors get 'hairy and dirty' and dishes are stacked on the counter waiting for someone to unload the dishwasher?
I can feel my anxiety go up....I get edgy. 
I can't stand the disorganization / clutter / dirt.
It doesn't have to be museum quality......but it has to be 'ready' for ANYONE to walk through the door.



> Where do i start? i dont want it pristine but i want it comfortable and manageable. thanks for your ideas. i have tried fly lady it was too rigid for our schedule.


I hated fly lady.

You will have to schedule 1 day a week, exclusively for cleaning a room.
Start with the kitchen.
THE WHOLE FAMILY needs to help.
Remove, everything from the kitchen.
Clean the ceiling, light fixtures, etc, then cabinet tops, walls, windows, screens in windows, then appliances, lower cabinets (inside and out) then floors.
NOW the kitchen is clean.

WHEN you put things back:
1. Make sure THEY are clean
2. Make sure it's something you use.
3. Make sure it's in 100% proper working order.
4. Get rid of things you don't use (like if you have 37 coffee cups and you are the only one who ever drinks coffee)

NEVER put back everything you took out.
You should purge at least 25% of what you took out of the kitchen.

Organize cabinets.
Take pictures if you must.
Tell THE WHOLE FAMILY, this is how this room is to stay; and if we keep this room neat and clean.......we will NEVER have to take a whole Saturday to clean it again.

Then be a stickler to keep it clean.
Do not accept laziness or excuses for why the dishes are stacking up.
Get everyone on the plan!!

Then move to the next room (I would recommend your master bedroom)

Eventually you will get through the whole house, and if you stick with maintaining the clean rooms......eventually you will have the whole house under control!!


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## Maura (Jun 6, 2004)

Wow, Laura, do you have any possessions at all? It does feel good to go through a room or a closet and fill up a garbage bag. I do this periodically with my yarn and fabric. I purge the refrigerator, which makes it easier to clean not to mention find stuff. I do it with my kitchen cupboards and my office area. It sure is a lot easier once the kids are grown. And btw, we have NOTHING of the kids. We are not their storage unit.


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## Taylor R. (Apr 3, 2013)

I'm with Laura. The kitchen is priority one. If you don't have an infestation now, you may wind up with one in the future. Dishes have got to get done in a timely manner, trash must be taken out regularly, counter tops and floors need to be cleaned off regularly. If you start with these maintenance chores and work into getting the kitchen organized so that those maintenance chores aren't too taxing, you're far more likely to stay on top of them. It only takes me about 20 minutes to do those bare minimum chores in my kitchen (granted my kitchen is small).


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## Bret (Oct 3, 2003)

Spell cleaning.


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## jmtinmi (Feb 25, 2009)

nostawmama said:


> I am not sure what kind of homeschool program/schedule you follow but consider replacing a "book learning" lesson with a "running/maintaining a household" lesson. This would give a scheduled place for housecleaning and teach the children something that you missed out on as a child!
> 
> Life skills are an important part of being an adult and it is sometimes missed by well meaning parents.


We had a similar situation to OP. I finally instituted a chore wheel (idea in tightwad gazzette). Between myself and two older DDs the chore wheel helped to insure a tidier home. This made me a better teacher and calmer Mom. I knew that IF the vacuuming didn't get done on one day, it would be scheduled again shortly. The chores were treated as ' classes' with high, but not impossible standards. Oh, and we did the chores before starting school lessons~~it was a psychological boost to have everything tidy.


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## Laura Zone 5 (Jan 13, 2010)

Maura said:


> Wow, Laura, do you have any possessions at all? It does feel good to go through a room or a closet and fill up a garbage bag. I do this periodically with my yarn and fabric. I purge the refrigerator, which makes it easier to clean not to mention find stuff. I do it with my kitchen cupboards and my office area. It sure is a lot easier once the kids are grown. And btw, we have NOTHING of the kids. We are not their storage unit.


I do have some stuff.....
Right now....too much stuff.
A lot of it belongs to the kids, and their dad.


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## Taylor R. (Apr 3, 2013)

Also, bathroom next. You can't expect to get clean in a dirty room! Bathroom ought to be a pretty quick fix, too.


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## sss3 (Jul 15, 2007)

Anyone heard from original OP?


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## mekasmom (Jan 19, 2010)

Maura said:


> I would start with giving each child a kitchen chore.


I like the whole post. It is important to teach the children to clean up after themselves. As far as the laundry, I would suggest you make sure they don't do anything that needs bleach until they are much older though. They can ruin a whole bunch of things really fast if they make a mistake. And the "pods" are great for kids to use too. They don't over-run the washer with suds that way.

Another thing, relax in homeschooling. It is homeschool, not school at home. Doing work for the sake of work is not needed. You just need for them to learn. So be a relaxed homeschooler. It shouldn't take several hours a day.


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## mrsgcpete (Sep 16, 2012)

thank you everyone for your replies. i have been around but with school ending, and the summer beginning we are in a whole different rhythm. i have tried to get some cleaning done while the kids are at summer school, and they have been doing some chores when they get home. its just taking time.


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## unregistered65598 (Oct 4, 2010)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> You will have to schedule 1 day a week, exclusively for cleaning a room.
> Start with the kitchen.
> THE WHOLE FAMILY needs to help.
> Remove, everything from the kitchen.
> ...


I really like this idea, after moving eveything out it would be like moving into a new place. That seems like the time you take the most care in putting things away and where you want them. Now to find that one day a week to do that :hair


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## unregistered65598 (Oct 4, 2010)

My houshold is alot like yours, except both DH and I work outside the home. I am going to try Laura's idea just as soon as I can. For now I am making one hour a day after work to get something cleaned and put away.The kids do help out, they don't have chores but do clean up whenever I ask them to do something. My problem stems from not being able to throw things away. Doesn't matter that it's been on top of my fridge for a year and I didn't even know it was there, when I find it I just put it somewhere else, only to find it again in another year.


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## bama (Aug 21, 2011)

I just joined a group on fb called bowl full of lemons 14 week challenge, or something like that. It is motivational and the people there are very friendly and helpful!


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## bama (Aug 21, 2011)

It is actually called "home organization 101: a bowl full of lemons 14 week challenge"

Again, wonderfully supportive people there, and it is a closed group so any comments, pics, etc are not shown to all your fb friends and family!


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## unregistered65598 (Oct 4, 2010)

Laura Zone 5 said:


> You will have to schedule 1 day a week, exclusively for cleaning a room.
> Start with the kitchen.
> THE WHOLE FAMILY needs to help.
> Remove, everything from the kitchen.
> ...


Just an update, I found that one day for the kitchen, while I did not involve the whole family, I did ask a friend of mine to help and she gladly said yes! (Note to self....Friends with OCD are your best alie when cleaning) Any way, we didn't take everything out as my house is to small to find a place to put it all while cleaning. What when did was split it into 3 sections and did each one seperately. She helped me to get rid of things I don't use and reorganize so that my kitchen flows better. We ended up with 3 garbages of crap I sent to the trash. End result...My kitchen is small, but now seems so much bigger and brighter! I have kept it clean for 2 weeks now:clap: I did slip on night and left the dishes in the sink. Thanks Laura for the great idea! A special thanks to my friend for helping me get this done. So if I can do this anyone can!


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## KeepingItAtHome (Jun 17, 2013)

I agree, get the kids involved, this is "HomeEc" in our house. I'm an "artsy fartsy" type and would much rather paint, sew, knit than do dishes. Cleaning is a part of our regular daily routine, in fact most of it gets done before school.


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## emeraldbutton (Oct 21, 2013)

I like this idea a lot and will be trying it soon!


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## sapphira (Mar 24, 2003)

Reading this thread, I went to google and put in storage solutions, click on images and way down I saw the use of one of those magazine holders for like a year of mags, clear plastic, and it was attached to the inside of a cabinet, I assume in the kitchen and the plastic wrap, reynolds wrap, etc, was stored in it !!!!!!!!!!! WELL ! I spent the last year looking for a way to store cutting boards and was going to build one out of wood for the cabinet door. THIS plastic one makes better sense, cheaper, can be gotten at yard sales, can see the cutting boards etc. !!! (I know won't store the bigger heavy ones, but I have several small and thin ones, especially for camping.) Thank you for this thread. And I would ask if anyone on here has come up with interesting storage solutions, no matter how small, and if you would put it on here !? Thanks - s


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## hotzcatz (Oct 16, 2007)

I can't really claim to have any useful household cleaning hints, unfortunately, as you can tell by the house. Our problem is relentless yard sales and getting "good stuff". We are just completely overpopulated with "good stuff". What has helped us a lot is getting space at a local resale shop. We can now take this wonderful "good stuff" that is too good to throw away there and sell it for money. Woot! The density level of stuff has dropped way down since then and if it goes to the store and doesn't sell, then it gets dropped off at the Salvation Army or other thrift shop.

My friend swears by FlyLady.com, I've not been that organized yet.


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