# Is there an age-limit here?



## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Hello. Taking a deep-breath and jumping in.

Before I introduce myself officially, I want to find out if I may fit here at all.

I've been a member of HT since 2009...in and out due to being very busy...and happily.

I am 70 yrs. old, widowed a couple of years...and am not husband-hunting. 

Neither am I lonely and pining away. I have a great family around. I very simply am looking for on-line friends of any age...who are single and understand my floundering as suddenly-single. We were married for 46 yrs...exclusively "us" since 19 yrs old. I know how to do "we"...clueless of how to do "me".


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## Guest (Oct 9, 2014)

Ox is 82 or more and post almost daily. Several regulars in this sub-forum are over 70.


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## arcticow (Oct 8, 2006)

Nope! No limit...


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## Vickie44 (Jul 27, 2010)

Welcome BlueJeans!


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## roadless (Sep 9, 2006)

Welcome Blue Jeans! I'm looking forward to your posts!


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## Ardie/WI (May 10, 2002)

I'm 72 and married and I love this group. No one has tried to run me out yet!


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank you for your quick replies and warm welcome. 

I have bailed from "Friendship" sites, where old folks seem to be looking for something more than casual on-line...er....friendship. 

A bit about me. I've spent my life on a cattle-ranch in the southwest...land has been in the families...[mine and DH's] for generations, he and I added some land to pass down to our kids and theirs.

Our kids and grands live nearby and we ranch together...some have outside jobs too. I continue to pitch-in with the work...though my pitch-er is slowing down fast. 

I love my life !!! My challenge is determination to have my OWN life after my husband's sudden death blew a huge HOLE smack in the middle of it. I don't want to be a "widow" who just crams her kids into the HOLE.

"We" had many good friends, though my husband was the out-going one who made "our" friends...which has become apparent. :happy2: Because I most enjoy male-critters company, his buddies are who I most hung-out with.

When he was gone, and for respectful and societies mores...the men can't continue to hang-out with me, a "widow", as before. I do understand that...it's just not done. But I feel as if I developed "cooties" overnight.

Has that happened to anyone else....?


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

P.S. My sense-of-humor is ridiculous...can be twisted and off-the-wall. I love laughing more than anything...and sometimes forget that not everybody takes things so UNseriously. I can be serious. I can. I can.


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## vicker (Jul 11, 2003)

Welcome, Bluejeans. You've found a good spot, with good people. I too have a very active sense of humor. Tragedy has honed it pretty sharp lol
However, I think most around here recognize it for what it is. Relax and be yourself.


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## Malamute (Sep 15, 2011)

arcticow said:


> Nope! No limit...


 Yeah, you don't even have to act any certain age. :happy2:


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## Malamute (Sep 15, 2011)

BlueJeans said:


> .... I do understand that...it's just not done. But I feel as if I developed "cooties" overnight.
> 
> Has that happened to anyone else....?


 
Single is always more complicated with married people as friends.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank you. 

I live in the middle of nowhere...by choice. I'm not 'zactly a hermit; yet much more reclusive than is good for me,,,probably. 

I have an active social-life...on-line....with groups of people with common-interests/passions/obsessions. I enjoy country-living, cattle and critters...NASCAR...and next to my family, I love off-roading and big loud trucks.

Obviously...these interests don't place me in real-life social things with people "my"...gasp...age. I love hanging out with young people; yet I miss having someone of my generation to over-romanticize and idealize "the good ole days"....with.

There's whence comes my angst with being "single". The single persons I know are HOT-AND-SINGLE....or OLD-and-half-dead, wanting a companion/keeper. Uh. Nope.

Being neither hot...or half-dead...I'm in no man's land...on top of being in the middle of nowhere. 

Not whining...just explaining.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

I really am a female. :happy2: I raised three sons...and half the boys in the county...so I can certainly cook, bake, do all kinds of 'girly' things in the house. I just prefer outdoors...and now that I am old, I get to do what I want to...

Which seldom coincides with what most other over-ripe females, in real life,,,, find interesting.


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## Darren (May 10, 2002)

We have a number of women here that are outstanding, read that as different in a good way, as compared to what some construe as mainstream. I'm not sure there is an average person these days unless you're into self-deception. 

Most times we play well together. Jump in. Be yourself. It's a great place.


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## 1shotwade (Jul 9, 2013)

Yah! OK, you're old enough! Welcome aboard!Got a question,ask! Answer others questions as you can,all is well. Sorry for your loss,must be hard!

Wade


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## Ramblin Wreck (Jun 10, 2005)

Look forward to reading more of your posts and hearing about all your adventures.


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## Terri in WV (May 10, 2002)

BlueJeans said:


> P.S. My sense-of-humor is ridiculous...can be twisted and off-the-wall. I love laughing more than anything...and sometimes forget that not everybody takes things so UNseriously. I can be serious. I can. I can.


You'll fit right in! :happy2: Welcome!


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

Heck, mose the wimmins in here say they are in NO MANS LAND LOL.


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## Jim-mi (May 15, 2002)

Sorry to let ya know but all the above folks are wrong .
They missed a small print line on page 4 of the rules and regs for HT. This rule was quietly added 1.5 years ago to go along with the federal guide lines for OweBummer Care. . . . .
It states that by the age of 99.5 you are ordered to be thrown under the bus......

So until you reach the moment, you can pretend to enjoy your self............


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thanks for the heads-up. No worries. When I reach age 99.4...I shall throw myself under the bus.


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## roadless (Sep 9, 2006)

Yep, you are fitting in here just beautifully Blue Jean!


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

:nanner: Thank ye.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

It's an honor and a relief to find a place with real people, who aren't looking for a UNICORN. As 83 yr old men who are looking for friendship with a female between 70-75...who must be financially independent, attractive, active, slim, a good cook, non-argumentative, non-smoker and non-drinker....willing to relocate. 

In what universe does a female survive to that age in THAT condition...and jump right on someone who tells her she can't smoke or drink? Before they've even met.? :heh:


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## handymama (Aug 22, 2014)

But I like unicorns. The horse thingys with horns on their heads.
I dare somebody to tell me I can't smoke lol. Or drink if I feel like it.


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

BJ, I see that ya got me beat by a few yrs. Best I remember tho, and maybe you've forgot, The jumpin right on, is in the reverse as you state it lol.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Oh dear...guess I have forgotten. Probably explains a lot. :facepalm:


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

LOL lol. Yup, Your gonna have alotta fun in here.

I could tell you about the worst of the shagnasty women in here, but Ill just wait for them to expose themselves lol.


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## 1shotwade (Jul 9, 2013)

BlueJeans said:


> Oh dear...guess I have forgotten. Probably explains a lot. :facepalm:



YYeap!! You're gonna fit in here!!

Wade


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

My uncanny discernment tells me I should go refresh my memory on the Rules of this forum. It would be embarrassing to get booted out...first thing.


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## 1shotwade (Jul 9, 2013)

It's pretty much OK to act a fool here! The biggest problem with that is not everyone will realize you're just acting!!LOL !

Wade


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Yep, I think I can abide by those rules. I've learned to double-check in case there's a ban on spitting on the sidewalk. Some sites are cranky about that.


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## Twp.Tom (Dec 29, 2010)

Welcome Blue Jeans-A Great group of folks here* Nice to meet You!


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank you. I look forward to learning who is who....eventually.


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

Spitting onna sidewalk?? Why thats nothing. halffa the women in here spit on haffa the men in here, and think nothing of it. lol


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## handymama (Aug 22, 2014)

Bill is jaded


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

That is valuable info. Thank you. Any other top-secrets I should know ? I have very high security-clearance.


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

BIG TIME. AND a cinic who needs to be in a clinic. Could I recommend a sex clinic for a cinic


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

I got nuthin'.


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## farmgal (Nov 12, 2005)

Hi blue jean, welcome to ST. I'm a few decades younger than you. 

As per your first question. My good friend lost her husband at 67. She too got the cooties. But they didn't last forever. Lol. She also developed friendship with us girls that she never saw before. She's just as you, full of life. She's 70 now and skis, hikes and boogie boards. So everything you stated your not alone. I suggest hanging with those more your speed, not your age. 

Sounds like you'll bring some fresh air into ST. 
Thanks.


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## tambo (Mar 28, 2003)

FarmboyBill said:


> LOL lol. Yup, Your gonna have alotta fun in here.
> 
> I could tell you about the worst of the shagnasty women in here, but Ill just wait for them to expose themselves lol.


I really can't believe you just wrote that!


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## homefire2007 (Sep 21, 2007)

Welcome BlueJeans!!! So nice to meet you!


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## Oxankle (Jun 20, 2003)

Hello, BJeans; this is Ox. Zong is off by a year--I'm actually 83. Widowed at 77, married again at 79. Don't lie down and play dead just yet -- You can never tell what life will throw at you.

This is a good group--as Bill implies, we come from all walks of life and have all sorts of different views as to how we should live our lives. 

Here you will find tragedy, humor, anger, laughter, advice good and bad. Enjoy yourself.


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## FarmboyBill (Aug 19, 2005)

I have been informed that the word shagnasty is verboten. That I should apologize, OR ELSE. So, from the cockles of my heart, I apologize.

I used it, since Red Skelton used it as a name on TV 50yrs ago. Sorry.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Farmgal, I appreciate your reply. Yes, I have made some very close female friends on-line...who are vital and fun-loving. We are in the same age-group,,,so do compare notes re aging ain't that much fun...but we have fun anyway.

I do side-step conversations anywhere that dwell on arthritis, BP,,,and someones latest colonoscopy. In my twilighting years, I don't wanna hear about all that stuff. I know it's out-there; but I pretend it's just the bogey-man under my bed...that goes away when I turn on the light. 

As I *think* I said already...my DDH and I spent most of our time with our kids and their friends. Ranching brings all together to work...and is our recreation.

Plus,,,all these BOYS built 4x4 trucks in our shop...for mud-bogging, rock-crawling, trail-riding...or just raisin' *hades*. [Can I say that? ]

We still do that as a family...after 25 + yrs. The boys are grown with their own ladies, who also love big, noisy trucks...some have their own big noisy trucks. 

I am as "bad" as any of them...have my own bad-mama truck, Maxine. 

Thus, I don't have time for discussing your colonoscopy... extensively!! I do care. But hey, I'm old and don't have a lotta good years left, anyway. I'll burn those bridges when I get to them. 

Now what was your question? :huh:


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## tambo (Mar 28, 2003)

Welcome Blue Jeans. I'm glad you found us!!


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## handymama (Aug 22, 2014)

Blue jeans you sound awesome


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank all of us for welcoming me so warmly. I look forward to reading back threads and try not to make blatant newbie blunders.

It's just exciting to find you. I do NOT like being single; but I certainly don't want a new man either. It's hard to have it both ways. :hair


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## Terri in WV (May 10, 2002)

Oh, I think it sounds like you have a whole lot of good years left!


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## L.A. (Nov 15, 2007)

Hey Blue,,I think you should know while age is not a factor,,,It is a bit like "Hotel California",,,,,,,"You can checkout anytime you like,,,but you can never leave"

&#9835; &#9834; &#9835;


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

:thumb: L.A.

I don't have any fear of dying...I just don't want to be dead before I am. Every widow claims to have had the best husband, the best marriage...yada, yada. But I did. "Home" for me was wherever he was...we were separate persons and didn't do everything together...that would be rather creepy. But we worked and played and laughed together...as hard as we could.

I don't LIKE being left...but I know he'd expect me to cowboy-up and have a great rest-of-my -life....not waste it wallowing.


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## frogmammy (Dec 8, 2004)

BlueJeans said:


> ....When he was gone, and for respectful and societies mores...the men can't continue to hang-out with me, a "widow", as before. I do understand that...it's just not done. But I feel as if I developed "cooties" overnight.
> 
> Has that happened to anyone else....?


Well, the flip side to that is his male friends become EXCEEDINGLY helpful....if you know what I mean.

Mon


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

:runforhills:


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Honestly, his/our male-friends have been very much gentlemen. It's just our culture to treat widows with respect. I don't believe their wives would have a problem with them visiting me,,,but it's just not done here.

lol The wives used to TELL them to go see me: "I'm sick of hearing about your truck...go find 'BlueJeans"..."

Ahem...there are a few old geezers who have phoned me for 'no reason whatsoever'....except thinking I was probably pining for whatever they think they have. I wasn't. :grit:


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## Forcast (Apr 15, 2014)

BlueJeans said:


> :thumb: L.A.
> 
> I don't have any fear of dying...I just don't want to be dead before I am. Every widow claims to have had the best husband, the best marriage...yada, yada. But I did. "Home" for me was wherever he was...we were separate persons and didn't do everything together...that would be rather creepy. But we worked and played and laughed together...as hard as we could.
> 
> I don't LIKE being left...but I know he'd expect me to cowboy-up and have a great rest-of-my -life....not waste it wallowing.


BlueJeans,
That made me cry, wish I could have had That kind of man in my life.
Welcome Im pretty new but this is a nice place to visit. A lot of good people with good ideas. And as it turns out a good place to vent and the folks here let you do it, and sometimes thats what we need to get on with living a not so great day, week, or month.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

(((Hug)) I wish every good woman had such a good man. I was blessed and knew it; he knew he was blessed too. Destiny put us together...because nobody else on planet-earth would put up with either of us. And THAT is the truth.


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## CajunSunshine (Apr 24, 2007)

Hiya BlueJeans! We are kindred spirits, yes we are! I'm not here to "pick up" anyone either. It is so nice to enjoy a delightful mix of homesteady folks without the usual pressures of the average "meet up" kind of place. There are singles, marrieds, young folks, and older folks all in one pile here. The interesting blend of personalities make this forum one of the nicest places on the 'net to be! 

I bumped this thread to give you an idea of what I'm talking about... Welcome!

http://www.homesteadingtoday.com/sp...letree/507918-homesteadingtoday-dynamics.html




.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank you for bumping the thread. Delightful over-view !!  Some of the cats, though, are too realistic. We are trying to incorporate 4 grown cats into our one loving home. To this writing, they are not interested in becoming The Furry Waltons.


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## ceresone (Oct 7, 2005)

Hi, BlueJeans! 77 here, widow for 31 months. We had over 48 years together. Like you, I'm a loner, and prefer it. Live on a farm, 3 children fairly near. Have 3 dogs, 2 cats, and 2 horses. not looking either-friends are on the internet--and I wear blue jeans too! Welcome


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Lovely to meet you. Thank you for the welcome. 

An active social-life on the internet suits me fine. We can visit in our jammies and at our convenience.


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## WhyNot (Jun 21, 2011)

BlueJeans said:


> Plus,,,all these BOYS built 4x4 trucks in our shop...for mud-bogging, rock-crawling, trail-riding...or just raisin' *hades*. [Can I say that? ]


Got any single ones? :happy2:


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

First, I must 'splain that I have 3 sons I gave birth to...and about a dozen others I claim. Unfortunately they grew up and fell into the trap of "jobs"...and aren't around all the time as when teenagers/college-age. Then, our place was Testosterone Rez,

Some still are nearby...in and out.,,,underfoot. All but one are in solid relationships. Sorry. My one single "son" lives in another state. He's 28. :happy2:

Certainly, I will keep an eye out for one for you. My boys have many buddies.


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## WhyNot (Jun 21, 2011)

Which state? lol


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

ummmm...Texas.


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## WhyNot (Jun 21, 2011)

HAHA! Me too. I'm goin' to a mud bog tomorrow.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

:clap: Have fun !!!! Our season is over for this year. It's getting too cold.


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## Bret (Oct 3, 2003)

1shotwade said:


> It's pretty much OK to act a fool here! The biggest problem with that is not everyone will realize you're just acting!!LOL !
> 
> Wade


I'm not acting.

Married and 50ish. ST passthroughs are part of my daily HT diet.


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## Guest (Dec 2, 2014)

Bret said:


> I'm not acting.
> 
> Married and 50ish. ST passthroughs are part of my daily HT diet.



I am old and married, too... I pass through ST a lot because of the hilarious conversations!


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## anniew (Dec 12, 2002)

Only read the first page so maybe someone else asked.
Why can't you continue to hang out with your male buddies. 
IMHO the idea that you (now without a partner) can't "hang" with them is an archaic idea...maybe it's a Southern thing.
I am a bit older than you, divorced over 35 years, and have male friends some of whom are married. If their relationship can't handle a female friend, then it is their problem.
We communicate with others of similar interests, not because of gender...at least I do.
Hope you enjoy meeting new friends here...as well as re-establishing your friendships with local male friends.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank you, anniew. I am enjoying meeting new friends here. 

I suppose "it" is regional customs/cultures. I live in the SW US...the last stronghold of the "Old West"-social mores. Widows are treated with...I guess the word is... 'deference'. Very caring, respectful and comforting. It just will take a bit more time, which I am fine with...I understand that.

My buddies' women have no fear that their men or I have any untoward ideas. lol I give them a break from having to listening to "guy stuff"...on and on.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

P.S. I am aware that it's up to ME to rejoin society. Stop licking my wounds, crawl out of my hole and be a person people enjoy being around. It's true that misery loves company...but company doesn't enjoy a miserable person very long.


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## sidepasser (May 10, 2002)

Welcome to the forum BlueJeans..

I know you have a truck, but the important thing is: Do you have a horse? And if you have a horse, do you ride it? And if you ride it, would you like company? I can bring my horse 

Welcome to the forum!!


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

sidepasser...thank you for the welcome. 

No, I don't have a horse at this time; but that's on my wish-list. 

I was riding by the time I walked,,,but not the type of riding most do. We ride cowboy-style...and/or wide-open bareback.

I am looking for A horse,,,I'm a one-horse broad. Problem is: I don't want to ride an "old lady's horse"...which is all I can manage now. lol I am not 18 yrs old anymore...not even 65 yrs old anymore. It's just my "head" thinks I still am young. :facepalm:

Tell me about your horse(s).


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## bigjon (Oct 2, 2013)

Welcome bluejeans!


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

Thank you. Pleased to be here. :gaptooth:


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## TxGypsy (Nov 23, 2006)

Howdy and welcome! 

You'll fit in just fine. The majority of the singles on here aren't looking for anyone either. Just a few of us that begin to feel like a pathetic fly futilely bumping our heads into the window over and over again in an attempt to find love.



BlueJeans said:


> "We" had many good friends, though my husband was the out-going one who made "our" friends...which has become apparent. :happy2: Because I most enjoy male-critters company, his buddies are who I most hung-out with.
> 
> When he was gone, and for respectful and societies mores...the men can't continue to hang-out with me, a "widow", as before. I do understand that...it's just not done. But I feel as if I developed "cooties" overnight.
> 
> Has that happened to anyone else....?


Yes!!! Being a single 40 something woman in Texas is danged difficult! I tend to get along with male critters better too. 



BlueJeans said:


> It's an honor and a relief to find a place with real people, who aren't looking for a UNICORN. As 83 yr old men who are looking for friendship with a female between 70-75...who must be financially independent, attractive, active, slim, a good cook, non-argumentative, non-smoker and non-drinker....willing to relocate.
> 
> In what universe does a female survive to that age in THAT condition...and jump right on someone who tells her she can't smoke or drink? Before they've even met.? :heh:


So you mean that continues on up into the 80's?!!! I was really hoping that folks would outgrow that before much longer.



BlueJeans said:


> ummmm...Texas.


Well! You may be a handy lady to know! How about I send you a picture of my tractor and 4x4 truck and you circulate it amongst some of your adopted single sons?


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## calliemoonbeam (Aug 7, 2007)

I don't know how I missed this thread, although I'm not around as much lately, but welcome to HT! You sound like you'll definitely fit right in, and who cares about age anyway?? I'm 59, but most days don't feel a day over 16! Well, until my past injuries remind me or I look in a mirror and do a double take when I see those silver streaks starting, ROFL! 

I'm a hippie, a biker, a drag racer, a hiker, and quite a few other personas all rolled into one, but under it all I always wanted to be a homesteader. Finally got to the country almost 8 years ago, and I'm loving every minute of it. I don't ever plan to slow down, no matter what my age!

I surely understand what you're talking about with the cooties though, lol. I think it is more of a southern or southwestern thing. My best friends have always been male, but it's just not "done" around here when you get to be our age. I lived in Colorado for years and had tons of friends of both sexes up there, but it's definitely different here. 

Well, sorry to yammer on so, but everyone can tell you I'm the resident blabbermouth, lol, my posts are always long.  Welcome to the fold!


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

bigjon, you've been in my thoughts, hoping you are beginning to find your footing. Being 'left behind' can be such an upheaval. A group of widow(er)s I visit with on-line, of course, commiserated and moaned about being 'left behind'...until one's auto-correct decided we are "Left Overs". All of us found that morbidly HILARIOUS. :bouncy: There's nothing that a bit of levity can't make easier.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

TxMex and calliemoonbeam...

Thank you for the warm welcome. I've taken off my boots and made myself right at home here. Am trying to learn the rules and not flaunt them seriously. I'm quite good about running threads off in the ditch...:facepalm:


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## sidepasser (May 10, 2002)

I have a TWH mare that I ride. I grew up with QHs and then rode TBs. Been riding since I was 9 and now I am 55. Hope you can get a nice horse to ride on your ranch!


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## bigjon (Oct 2, 2013)

bluejeans,yes i'm finding my footing.i admit its tough being left behind.good days/bad days/worse days/great days&laugh out loud days with my 3yr old granddaughter.but i'm rambling-welcome dearheart. what took u so long to get here?lol.


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## BlueJeans (Jan 17, 2009)

bigjon...I was all over the place for awhile...swinging between trying to glue my world back together....and not giving a darn. Homesteading sites were the last thing I cared about. I'd been here; but wasn't single then...so wasn't aware of this forum.

Then my son and his special lady moved onto this property. She was raised with chickens, goats, pigs, you-name-it...and we began planning our chicken-facilities. I remembered HT, found it...and here I landed. The End.


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## Guest (Dec 4, 2014)

Hey there with a smile, a wave and a hearty handshake...Just got my laptop back today, so have missed a lot of posts...I'm 66. recently married ( to Arcticow)..and have been hanging around here 16 years..LOL..sheesh...lots of lovely people here...welcome!


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## ceresone (Oct 7, 2005)

lol, i looked you up, blue jeans, and they told me i was searching for a old post, i might consider a new one. just wondered how youre doing


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## harrylee (9 mo ago)

Last seen Oct 15, 2019.....Either she got busy or..........


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