# First tresspasser this year...



## TripleD (Feb 12, 2011)

A door to door meat salesman drives past two posted signs trying to sell me meat. Everything worked out well driveway alarm #1 goes off at 300yds #2 at 150yds and me and the dog were waiting on him in the yard.

He tells me a lie right off saying he sells to all 3 of my neighbors and points out the houses. Mom lives in one DB in the next one and Sis in the last one. We all live on the same farm.

I show him a pasture full of cows, pig pastures with about 15 hogs and a 40 X 40 pen of turkeys. I asked if he really thinks I need to buy meat off a truck ? His girl friend is scoping out the place pretty hard. I told him to leave and stop at the end of the driveway get out of his truck and read my sign and he did. ''Tresspassers will be shot and survivors will be shot again''


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## cast iron (Oct 4, 2004)

TripleD said:


> A door to door meat salesman drives past two posted signs trying to sell me meat.


Very few people besides ups/fedex come down our narrow, heavily treed, single lane, no turnaround, private road but we do get these meat salesman every couple of years.

It's always some guy and his girlfriend in a beat up ford ranger/toyota/chev/dodge pickup with a residential chest freezer in the bed. The tailgate is open because the freezer is too long, and the electrical cord from the freezer either hanging off the end of the tailgate or sometimes even dragging on the ground. There are no business markings on the truck.

"Have I got a deal for you..."


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## TnAndy (Sep 15, 2005)

Wayne02 said:


> "Have I got a deal for you..."


Yeah buddy....exactly what I need.....meat that has been thawed and refrozen Lord only knows how many times.....


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## TnAndy (Sep 15, 2005)

TripleD said:


> A door to door meat salesman drives past two posted signs trying to sell me meat. Everything worked out well driveway alarm #1 goes off at 300yds #2 at 150yds and me and the dog were waiting on him in the yard.


Next home improvement you need is a GATE. Mine is closed all the time except when I know a UPS/etc delivery is coming.

But if you get one, keep the batteries up in the driveway alarms. Some people will still make the hike on foot....


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## foxfarm (Dec 15, 2014)

I agree with you. My dad really and mean really hates &#128545; trespassers. A few weeks ago this women wrecked truck in our field and they had the nerve to have a rollback to get the truck without asking my dad first and boy was he mad when he found out thanks to our renters grandson.


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## 1shotwade (Jul 9, 2013)

TnAndy said:


> Yeah buddy....exactly what I need.....meat that has been thawed and refrozen Lord only knows how many times.....




Even worse,it's a good chance it was stolen from one of your neighbors!

Wade


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## bigjon (Oct 2, 2013)

last trespassers were reporters from people magazine lookin for my wife,when I went out-they backed way off-I was cookin breakfast-forgot to put the paring knife down!oops:facepalm::facepalm::facepalm:


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## Ozarks Tom (May 27, 2011)

A friend's son-in-law was selling meat like that some time ago. Out of friendship I bought a half dozen filets. He asked me a couple months later if I wanted some more. Told him no, but next time they hijack a meat truck make sure it's not headed for Bonanza Steak House. Toughest meat I'd ever eaten.


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## terri9630 (Mar 12, 2012)

A few years ago my BIL bought meat like that. "Dirt cheap and was delicious.". I told him it was probably a stolen beef. One of my neighbors had about 30 head taken that year. Cow/calf and bred cows, put him out a lot of money.


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## TnAndy (Sep 15, 2005)

Ozarks Tom said:


> A friend's son-in-law was selling meat like that some time ago. Out of friendship I bought a half dozen filets. He asked me a couple months later if I wanted some more. Told him no, but next time they hijack a meat truck make sure it's not headed for Bonanza Steak House. Toughest meat I'd ever eaten.


And the funny thing is they call it "Restaurant Packs"....there is no weight on the package. 

One of them came by once (pre-gate ), selling that junk. Just fooling with them, I asked: "OK....how many pounds of meat am I getting ?"

"Uh....not sold by the pound....sold in Restaurant packs"

Well WHAT the heck is that ? How do you compare prices if you have no idea what you are paying for a given amount ? Are people REALLY that stupid ?

So, yeah, it probably WAS headed to Bonanza.....ahahahaaaaaa....but I doubt even they buy it by the "pack".


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## TnAndy (Sep 15, 2005)

terri9630 said:


> A few years ago my BIL bought meat like that. "Dirt cheap and was delicious.". I told him it was probably a stolen beef. One of my neighbors had about 30 head taken that year. Cow/calf and bred cows, put him out a lot of money.


Like a guy came around the auto shop I was working at once, selling "Whole Hog Sausage" for $1/lb. (ok....this was many years ago). 

After he left, one of the older mechanics said "Hmmm....hogs are selling for over a $1.00lb live weight.....how can this guy sell "whole hog" anything for less than that ? Either you ain't buying hog, or you're buying stolen hog !"

Food for thought....so to speak.....


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## simi-steading (Sep 27, 2012)

You could have told the guy you didn't need any meat, but you were starting to get low on Soylent Green...


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## simi-steading (Sep 27, 2012)

Ya know though... I'm going to bring up something here that's serious for a moment... 

I've thought about getting some of the same kinda witty signs... But say for some really unfortunate reason a time does come you do have to shoot someone on your property to protect you or your family.... 

Those signs kind of take away from the legitimacy of having to do what you have to do... I've decided against any, and use strictly POSTED and KEEP OUT signs..


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## TnAndy (Sep 15, 2005)

Even worse.....it gives a zealous prosecutor (or THEIR attorney in a civil suit) evidence that you had prior intent to shoot someone, even if you thought it was just funny.

Why would you want to help get yourself in MORE trouble with a fool sign ?


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## unregistered353870 (Jan 16, 2013)

I agree...those signs are funny, but I would never post one. I had my signs custom made to include the word "biohazard" and the symbol. It's completely untrue, but they look very official and have a disease name and made up but realistic-sounding government agency name in small print at the bottom. They work very well...even invited guests are hesitant to go past them.

I don't have a picture of mine, but here's a generic biohazard sign...something about that symbol just inspires people to respect the property line...throw the word "ebola" in there and you really have something....


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## Nimrod (Jun 8, 2010)

The last time I had a meat salesman drive in my driveway his story was that he was delivering for a meat buying club. Supposedly people joined a club and got great prices on top grade meat. He said someone had moved and he couldn't deliver their meat so he would make me a great deal on it.

I looked at the meat and it was a light pink, not deep red. Then I noticed the address of the company on the box. It was 3 blocks from where I lived for 22 years and I walked past there every time I went to the barber shop. LOL There is no such company at that address. Goodby.


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## watcher (Sep 4, 2006)

TripleD said:


> A door to door meat salesman drives past two posted signs trying to sell me meat. Everything worked out well driveway alarm #1 goes off at 300yds #2 at 150yds and me and the dog were waiting on him in the yard.
> 
> He tells me a lie right off saying he sells to all 3 of my neighbors and points out the houses. Mom lives in one DB in the next one and Sis in the last one. We all live on the same farm.
> 
> I show him a pasture full of cows, pig pastures with about 15 hogs and a 40 X 40 pen of turkeys. I asked if he really thinks I need to buy meat off a truck ? His girl friend is scoping out the place pretty hard. I told him to leave and stop at the end of the driveway get out of his truck and read my sign and he did. ''Tresspassers will be shot and survivors will be shot again''


I'd met him in the drive with a shotgun in my hands and telling him I'd already dialed 91 on my phone so it won't take so long for the sheriff and coroner to get there if he didn't leave quickly. Of course some people say I'm antisocial.


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## Jlynnp (Sep 9, 2014)

simi-steading said:


> Ya know though... I'm going to bring up something here that's serious for a moment...
> 
> I've thought about getting some of the same kinda witty signs... But say for some really unfortunate reason a time does come you do have to shoot someone on your property to protect you or your family....
> 
> Those signs kind of take away from the legitimacy of having to do what you have to do... I've decided against any, and use strictly POSTED and KEEP OUT signs..


When I was still able to train protection/K9 dogs our yard was surrounded by a 6 ft tall industrial/commercial fencing. There were signs every 10 feet that clearly stated "Dogs on Premises" on the gate were 2 bright yellow signs - one stated "Do Not Enter - Ring Bell For Assistance" the other clearly said "Professionally Trained Protection Dogs on Premises". The gang bangers in the neighborhood would cross the street instead of walk in front of ours. Somehow my Belgian Malinois jumping up and down barking and slinging spit everywhere put the fear of dog in them. I even had a couple of the local LEO's ask if they could toss the gang bangers over the fence, it would have saved on dog food.


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## remmettn (Dec 26, 2005)

Ok, good you know the first rule âbe civil tell it is time to be not civilâ
Maybe just a dumb ass trying to make a buck.
But next time License Number of the truck or car and if you can photos of the people.
*People ask why are you taking my picture?*
*I say oh it is ok; I can never give good identification to the sheriff.*
If I was a bad guy checking out/ reckoning your dwelling the fact that you have photos of me would make me not come back.

In Spokane, Washington we have a number we call âcrimecheckâ when something funny not a crime but something we want the cops to know we call this number.
It gives the cops the heads up.




:cute:


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## Maura (Jun 6, 2004)

Bonanza and Ponderosa put papaya juice on the steak to make it tender. Or they used to, might be using a different tenderizer now. I cannot eat at one of those places.

When I lived in town about once a year a guy would come around saying he had meat left on the truck&#8230; blah blah blah. Yea, sure. The Schwann&#8217;s guy has a company truck and never seems to have &#8216;extra&#8217;.


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## Pack Rat (Nov 9, 2006)

The last trespasser (uninvited visitor) here was a G-ment ag inspector. Seems there's something about filling out paperwork that gives me permission to do certain things here that also gives them permission to come inspect at their whim. No problems found, of course. Just wouldn't want to presumptiously meet that person in the driveway while racking a round in a 12ga.


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## hurryiml8 (Apr 15, 2009)

Those driveway alarms are great and cheap! I also have a fence with a gate at my sidewalk and a beware of the dog sign. A couple of days ago the fedx or ups guy reached over the gate and was just about bitten by my pitt mix. He said " I didn't think he'd actually bite". He's not the first to ignore the sign while the dog jumps and snarls on the other side. I don't understand some people.


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## GeneMO (Dec 8, 2014)

I could have fun with those folks if I was in an onery mood. 5th Generation farmer, Degree in Animal Science and trained with the University of Missouri meat judging team.

Gene


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## SmokeEater2 (Jan 11, 2010)

We haven't had one of those traveling meat salesman show up in a couple of years. There was a truck in town a couple of weeks ago set up on a vacant corner. Rented Ryder type truck with a couple of residential freezers in the back and a sign for "Ribeye steaks, 20 for $30.00."

Yeah, I'll bet those were some quality cuts. :yuck:


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## Cygnet (Sep 13, 2004)

Used to be a truck that would park at an intersection near Maricopa, AZ, that sold fresh shrimp they supposedly brought up from Rocky Point, Mexico. Nope, nope, just NOPE. 

As far as meat salesmen -- I haven't seen one lately. Doesn't seem to happen much around here. I used to get guys selling huge bags of oranges out of the backs of pickups all the time, though. I always wanted to ask if oranges tasted better if they were picked by the light of the moon.


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## Conhntr (Aug 7, 2010)

remmettn said:


> *People ask why are you taking my picture?*
> *I say oh it is ok; I can never give good identification to the sheriff.*
> [/SIZE][/FONT]
> 
> ...


Thats a good tip. People who are doing nothing wrong have no trouble with getting their picture taken. 

My signS say "warning firearms in use no tresspassing" 

Been here 3 years and had 2 trespassers 1 was a "im looking for my lost dog" may have been true may have been casing?
The other was one of these meat salesman with the beat truck, girlfriend, and unplugged freezer...

i am a friendly guy; but trespassers and salesman that take advantage of people manners are exempt from being treated nicely


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